Because secrets aren't forever, sooner or later the truth will be discovered........and then what?
Will the discovery of your partner's infidelity be lessened simply because you found out 10, 15 years later? And if so, what assurance do you have that your partner wasn't also screwing around for the past 10 or 15 years with other people?
Marriage is based on total trust, and if that trust is broken just once, where is the guarantee that it won't or hasn't been broken again?
Ahhh...I will quote the Protestant pastor who was giving advice to the married sailors on my navy ship as we approached San Diego on our return trip from the Persian Gulf (including stops in the Philippines). I was single at the time.
“Some of you may have done some things you are embarrassed of or regret while deployed. Some of you may feel like you should tell your spouses what you did.
I would ask you, what good would that do now? What would telling your spouse accomplish? What are you trying to accomplish by telling your spouse?”
In short....the only person harmed right now...is the cheater. They are forced to live with theor actions. If they actually feel remorse and are no longer cheating....and there is no l dial reason for the child or non-parent to onow about the “one night stand”.....then telling everyone only ruins two or three more lives when only the cheating mother should be suffering.