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Dispatch from the Future (Satire)
JPFO ^ | 7-12-2014 | Claire Wolfe

Posted on 07/13/2014 3:54:17 PM PDT by Ellendra

NOTE: The following document was found in the ruins of the Mount Weather complex in the year C.E. 2715 and has been in the keeping of the staff of the Interglobal History Museum since then. Although our scholars and scientists are still analyzing this material, it is believed to date from the era of Malia Rodham-Bloomberg (reigned C.E. 2044-2067) or her successor Mitt Kennedy Bush (reigned C.E. 2067-?).

Below is our translation. --------------------


BACKGROUND: Following the Sunnyside Nursery School Massacre and similar disasters, Americans in the mid decades of the twenty-first century realized that "NO GUNS" signs and similarly stringent security measures were no longer sufficient to totally eliminate deadly violence from society.

Although the gun-rights movement had experienced decades of successes, Americans finally rose up and demanded sweeping reforms. Some notable pacifists called for the slaughter of all gun owners and the torture of any politicians perceived to be pro gun. Police chiefs threatened to have their officers shoot any armed person on sight. The nation was in crisis.

With Congress in its 23rd consecutive year of disarray, the president moved to calm the fury with a unilateral series of moderate but firm measures. The president issued a comprehensive series of Executive Orders targeting firearms and their owners.

It has been five years since these Orders took effect. We, the members of this impartial Blue-Ribbon Panel, are now charged with analyzing their effectiveness and making recommendations for additional measures.

(Excerpt) Read more at ...

KEYWORDS: banglist; clairewolfe; guns; satire

1 posted on 07/13/2014 3:54:17 PM PDT by Ellendra
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To: Ellendra

“We skipped the light Fandango
Turned cartwheels ‘cross the floor
I was feeling kind of seasick
But the crowd called out for more
The room was humming harder
As the ceiling flew away
When we called out for another drink
The waiter brought a tray”

2 posted on 07/13/2014 3:58:23 PM PDT by Zeneta (Thoughts in time and out of season.)
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To: Ellendra

The anti-gunners would institute every one of the EOs if they thought that they could.

3 posted on 07/13/2014 4:45:42 PM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (The cure has become worse than the disease. Support an end to the WOD now.)
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To: Conservaliberty; RepRivFarm


4 posted on 07/14/2014 10:40:49 AM PDT by lcms rev
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To: lcms rev

Claire Wolfe is one of my favorite writers. If she would have a beer with me, I’d love to ask her if the awkward stage is over.

5 posted on 07/14/2014 12:41:04 PM PDT by RepRivFarm ("During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act." -George Orwell)
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