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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 07/18/2014 5:26:53 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

During a World Economic Summit, Barack Obama, Mexican President Felipe Calderón, Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin, and French President Nicolas Sarkozy are ceremonially riding in Japan's newest bullet train. As you might know all of these political leaders have big egos and this is what ensued.

Barack Obama says, "This is a fine bottle of wine Nicolas".

Upon hearing this, President Nicolas Sarkozy throws out a case of France's finest wine and says, "In France, fine wine is bountiful and plenty!"

Not to be outdone by Vladimir Putin, who then throws out two cases of Russia's finest Vodka, "In Russia, premier vodka spirits flow like the Volga River".

President Obama not wanting to seem weak, thinks for a moment, looks at Mexican president Felipe Calderón, and throws him out the window.



 

A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal immigrant in the bushes right by the border fence in Texas, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now."

The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senior, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!"

The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use 3 english words in a sentence."

The Mexican, of course, agrees.

The Border Patrol Agent tells him, "The 3 words are Green, Pink and Yellow.......Now use all them in 1 sentence."

The Mexican man thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, "Hmmm, Ok...... The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?"

A Russian arrives in New York City as a new immigrant to the United States . He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you Mr. American for letting me into this country, giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care, and a free education!"

The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am a Mexican."

The man goes on and encounters another passerby. "Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America ."

The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese."

The new arrival walks farther, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand, and says, "Thank you for wonderful America !

That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East . I am not American."

He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?"

She says, "No, I am from Africa ."

Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?"
The African lady checks her watch and says, "Probably at work.."


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: border; illegals; ofst; silliness
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1 posted on 07/18/2014 5:26:53 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
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To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...

It's an invasion

OF


CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST



2 posted on 07/18/2014 5:29:07 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top 10?


3 posted on 07/18/2014 5:29:24 AM PDT by secret garden (Why procrastinate when you can perendinate?)
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To: Lucky9teen

top five....woot woot


4 posted on 07/18/2014 5:29:38 AM PDT by Yorlik803 ( Church/Caboose in 2016)
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To: secret garden

Yay!


5 posted on 07/18/2014 5:30:59 AM PDT by P.O.E. (Pray for America)
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To: Lucky9teen
WOO HOO !!! TOP TEN !!!
6 posted on 07/18/2014 5:31:04 AM PDT by Hoodat (Article 4, Section 4)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top 8


7 posted on 07/18/2014 5:32:26 AM PDT by Dacula
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To: Lucky9teen

Woo-hoo Top Ten?!


8 posted on 07/18/2014 5:33:45 AM PDT by eCSMaster ("It is not the color of his skin, ... it is the blackness that fills his soul")
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To: Lucky9teen

in


9 posted on 07/18/2014 5:35:02 AM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> ---)
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To: Lucky9teen
Top 10 or close to it?




10 posted on 07/18/2014 5:35:26 AM PDT by upchuck (The country is being billed for its own execution. ~ h/t: SpaceBar)
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To: Lucky9teen

In


11 posted on 07/18/2014 5:35:52 AM PDT by ConservativeChris (I feel like Marvin Boggs!)
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To: Lucky9teen

Good Morning!


12 posted on 07/18/2014 5:36:13 AM PDT by left that other site (You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
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To: eCSMaster

Top 20????


13 posted on 07/18/2014 5:38:00 AM PDT by DooDahhhh
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14 posted on 07/18/2014 5:38:49 AM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> ---)
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To: DooDahhhh

Top 15!


15 posted on 07/18/2014 5:39:14 AM PDT by EQAndyBuzz (GM is dead and Al Queada is alive.)
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To: left that other site

In With the Dirty Dozen! :-)


16 posted on 07/18/2014 5:39:23 AM PDT by left that other site (You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top 20?


17 posted on 07/18/2014 5:41:17 AM PDT by JRios1968 (I'm guttery and trashy, with a hint of lemon. - Laz)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top Two Oh.


18 posted on 07/18/2014 5:43:04 AM PDT by TADSLOS (The Event Horizon has come and gone. Buckle up and hang on.)
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To: Lucky9teen
Top twenty...or so...

Reportedly from Austin last week during Zer0's fundraising run:


19 posted on 07/18/2014 5:46:43 AM PDT by ErnBatavia (It ain't a "hashtag"....it's a damn pound sign, number sign, or octothorpe. ###)
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To: left that other site
That's love
20 posted on 07/18/2014 5:47:07 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: ErnBatavia

EXCELLENT!!


21 posted on 07/18/2014 5:48:02 AM PDT by TADSLOS (The Event Horizon has come and gone. Buckle up and hang on.)
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To: upchuck

22 posted on 07/18/2014 5:48:32 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: upchuck

23 posted on 07/18/2014 5:49:34 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: Lucky9teen
A third grader's joke

What do you call a deer with no eyes ? answer : 'No Idea'......................

{ no Eye deer}

24 posted on 07/18/2014 5:51:33 AM PDT by virgil283 (When attacked by clowns go for the juggler)
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To: TADSLOS
Men sometimes have to do some dirty work
25 posted on 07/18/2014 5:51:41 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: Lucky9teen

26 posted on 07/18/2014 5:52:04 AM PDT by ken in texas
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To: Lucky9teen

LMAO. Been there, done that many times.


27 posted on 07/18/2014 5:57:06 AM PDT by TADSLOS (The Event Horizon has come and gone. Buckle up and hang on.)
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To: Lucky9teen
Weird Al - Foil
28 posted on 07/18/2014 5:57:34 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (Tri nornar eg bir. Binde til rota...)
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To: upchuck

29 posted on 07/18/2014 5:59:54 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (Tri nornar eg bir. Binde til rota...)
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To: ken in texas

30 posted on 07/18/2014 6:01:18 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (Tri nornar eg bir. Binde til rota...)
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To: Lucky9teen

LOL! :-)


31 posted on 07/18/2014 6:02:40 AM PDT by left that other site (You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
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To: smokingfrog
I love Fridays...


32 posted on 07/18/2014 6:02:57 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (Tri nornar eg bir. Binde til rota...)
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To: Lucky9teen
TOP THIRTY!

Have a good weekend Lucky!

33 posted on 07/18/2014 6:03:21 AM PDT by Rummyfan (Iraq: it's not about Iraq anymore, it's about the USA!)
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To: Rummyfan
Okay, TOP THIRTY FIVE!
34 posted on 07/18/2014 6:04:29 AM PDT by Rummyfan (Iraq: it's not about Iraq anymore, it's about the USA!)
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To: smokingfrog

35 posted on 07/18/2014 6:04:54 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (Tri nornar eg bir. Binde til rota...)
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To: DooDahhhh

You’re not in the top twenty - you’re in the top thirteen!


36 posted on 07/18/2014 6:05:59 AM PDT by Izzy Dunne (Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top 627!!


37 posted on 07/18/2014 6:07:00 AM PDT by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (I'm not anti-government, government's anti-me.)
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To: virgil283

Don’t forget the sequel:
What do you call a dead deer with no eyes?

“Still no idea”


38 posted on 07/18/2014 6:07:05 AM PDT by Izzy Dunne (Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
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To: virgil283

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?

Still no-eye deer.


39 posted on 07/18/2014 6:08:11 AM PDT by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (I'm not anti-government, government's anti-me.)
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To: Dead Corpse
I really need one of those!
40 posted on 07/18/2014 6:08:33 AM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> ---)
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To: Lucky9teen

3 boys were fishing on the Potomac river. 0 was jogging by, slipped, and fell in the river. The boys pulled him out.
0 said, “You boys name anything you want.”
The first said, “Season tickets to Yankees games.”
0 says, “You got it”.
The second says, “Trip to Disneyland for me and my family.”
0 says, “You got it”.
The third says, “A motorized wheel chair.”
0 says, “Why would a healthy young man want a wheel chair?”
“When my dad finds out I pulled you out, I’m gonna need it.”


41 posted on 07/18/2014 6:08:48 AM PDT by wdk535
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To: Dead Corpse

I love Weird Al, but these days he releases a new song parody and chances are good I’ve never heard the original.


42 posted on 07/18/2014 6:13:04 AM PDT by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (I'm not anti-government, government's anti-me.)
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To: Lucky9teen

43 posted on 07/18/2014 6:26:54 AM PDT by DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis
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To: Lucky9teen

Two weeks in a row: Top SOMETHING!


44 posted on 07/18/2014 6:33:31 AM PDT by Monkey Face (When I told you I was normal, I may have exaggerated slightly.)
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To: Lucky9teen
 photo teachers_who_take_the_cake_for_awes_zps321fb03c.jpg
45 posted on 07/18/2014 6:35:28 AM PDT by SkyDancer (If you do not read the newspapers you are uninformed. If you do read the newspapers you are misinfo)
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To: Lucky9teen

46 posted on 07/18/2014 6:38:17 AM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis

47 posted on 07/18/2014 6:42:16 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: Lucky9teen
Thanks again Lucky9teen.

FMCDH(BITS)

48 posted on 07/18/2014 7:03:45 AM PDT by nothingnew (Hemmer and MacCullum are the worst on FNC)
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To: Lucky9teen
I don't recall my wife and I being taped. Where did you get that??!!

FMCDH(BITS)

49 posted on 07/18/2014 7:12:09 AM PDT by nothingnew (Hemmer and MacCullum are the worst on FNC)
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To: Lucky9teen

Gramps has got himself some twerking moves!! That’s awesome!!


50 posted on 07/18/2014 7:20:47 AM PDT by Hoffer Rand (Bear His image. Bring His message. Be the Church.)
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