Skip to comments.Giant anteaters kill two hunters in Brazil
Posted on 07/26/2014 7:46:12 AM PDT by Scoutmaster
Washington (AFP) - Giant anteaters in Brazil have killed two hunters in separate incidents, raising concerns about the animals' loss of habitat and the growing risk of dangerous encounters with people, researchers said.
The long-nosed, hairy mammals are not typically aggressive toward people and are considered a vulnerable species by the International Union for the Conservation of Nature (IUCN), largely due to deforestation and human settlements that encroach on their territory. [snip]
(Excerpt) Read more at news.yahoo.com ...
It doesn't look as if Brazil will get out of the Group of Death.
I guess we can expect the Obama regime to start importing “unaccompanied” hunters to America from Brazil.
From what I know of giant anteaters I’d say this story is complete BS.
Maybe they migrated from Belize, El Salvador, Guatemala, and Uruguay to the United States to seek asylum.
“concerns about the animals’ loss of habitat “
Climate change in other words. It is our fault.
That’s got to be embarrassing.
Global Warming is accelerating their metabolism.
They aren’t terribly fast moving animals and don’t even have teeth. The claws are the only real danger.
“Leaf blowers can startle them.”
“Honey! I can’t clean up the yard today.”
“What’s your excuse this time?”
“Giant anteaters. They have fingernails like switchblade knives and leaf blowers can startle them.”
“Have you seen many giant anteaters in our neighborhood?”
“I’m pretty sure there’s one in the Nelson’s back yard.”
“That’s a Labradoodle.”
“Are you sure? I could swear it was eating ants.”
I do have a scar from a muskrat bite.
Counsellor: Yes, yes, yes, I do follow, Mr Anchovy, but you see the snag is... if I now call Mr Chipperfield and say to him, 'look here, I've got a forty-five-year-old chartered accountant with me who wants to become a lion tamer', his first question is not going to be 'does he have his own hat?' He's going to ask what sort of experience you've had with lions.
Anchovy: Well I ... I've seen them at the zoo.
Counsellor: Good, good, good.
Anchovy: Lively brown furry things with short stumpy legs and great long noses. I don't know what all the fuss is about, I could tame one of those. They look pretty tame to start with.
Counsellor: And these, er, these lions ... how high are they?
Anchovy: (indicating a height of one foot) Well they're about so high, you know. They don't frighten me at all.
Counsellor: Really. And do these lions eat ants?
Anchovy: Yes, that's right.
Counsellor: Er, well, Mr Anchovy ... I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater.
Anchovy: A what?
Counsellor: An anteater. Not a lion. You see a lion is a huge savage beast, about five feet high, ten feet long, weighing about four hundred pounds, running forty miles per hour, with masses of sharp pointed teeth and nasty long razor-sharp claws that can rip your belly open before you can say 'Eric Robinson', and they look like this.
[The counsellor produces large picture of a lion and shows to Mr Anchovy who screams and passes out.]
It was determined that both hunters had ants in their pants.
I think Zappa read that article too.