Posted on 08/12/2017 5:49:55 AM PDT by sodpoodle
Some good ones for all the jocks.....
Don Meredith, Dallas Cowboys Quarterback once said: “Coach Tom Landry is such a perfectionist that if he was married to Raquel Welch, he would expect her to cook.”
Harry Neale, professional hockey coach: "Last year we couldn't win at home and we were losing on the road. My failure as a coach was that I couldn't think of anyplace else to play.”
Reggie Jackson commenting on Tom Seaver: "Blind people come to the ballpark just to listen to him pitch."
Doug Sanders, professional golfer: "I'm working as hard as I can to get my life and my cash to run out at the same time. If I can just die after lunch Tuesday, everything will be perfect."
Mickey Lolich, Detroit Tigers pitcher: "All the fat guys watch me and say to their wives, 'See, there's a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer.'"
Max McGee, Green Bay Packers receiver: "When it's third and ten, you can have the milk drinkers; I'll take the whiskey drinkers every time."
Tommy LaSorda , L A Dodgers manager: "I found out that it's not good to talk about my troubles. Eighty percent of the people who hear them don't care and the other twenty percent are glad I'm having them."
E.J. Holub, Kansas City Chiefs linebacker regarding his 12 knee operations: "My knees look like they lost a knife fight with a midget."
Vic Braden, tennis instructor: "My theory is that if you buy an ice-cream cone and make it hit your mouth, you can learn to play tennis. If you stick it on your forehead, your chances aren't as good.”
Tommy John , N.Y. Yankees, recalling his 1974 arm surgery: "When they operated, I told them to add in a Koufax fastball. They did, but unfortunately it was Mrs. Koufax's."
Walt Garrison, Dallas Cowboys fullback when asked if Tom Landry ever smiles: "I don't know. I only played there for nine years."
John Breen, Houston Oilers: "We were tipping off our plays. Whenever we broke from the huddle, three backs were laughing and one was pale as a ghost.”
Bum Phillips, New Orleans Saints, after viewing a lopsided loss to the Atlanta Falcons:"The film looks suspiciously like the game itself."
Some New Ones. Pretty Good
Al Hrabosky, major league relief pitcher: “When I'm on the road, my greatest ambition is to get a standing boo."
Bill Veeck, Chicago White Sox owner: "I have discovered in 20 years of moving around the ball park that the knowledge of the game is usually in inverse proportion to the price of the seats."
Paul Horning, Green Bay Packers running back on why his marriage ceremony was before noon: “Because if it didn't work out, I didn't want to blow the whole day."
Lou Holtz , Arkansas football coach: "I have a lifetime contract. That means I can't be fired during the third quarter if we're ahead and moving the ball."
Knute Rockne, when asked why Notre Dame had lost a game: "I won't know until my barber tells me on Monday."
Jim Frey, K.C. Royals manager when asked what advice he gives George Brett on hitting: "I tell him "Attaway to hit, George."
Bill Walton, Portland Trail Blazers: "I learned a long time ago that 'minor surgery' is when they do the operation on someone else, not you."
George MacIntyre, Vanderbilt football coach surveying the team roster that included 26 freshmen and 25 sophomores: "Our biggest concern this season will be diaper rash."
Rick Venturi, Northwestern football coach: "The only difference between me and General Custer is that I have to watch the films on Sunday."
Will Rogers’ quotes:
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Will_Rogers
Hundreds of his words of wisdom; here are just a few.
________________________________________________________
I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they do today.
Will Rogers
I was not a child prodigy, because a child prodigy is a child who knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows up.
Will Rogers
I’m not a real movie star. I’ve still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago.
Will Rogers
If you want to know how a man stands, go among the people who are in his same business.
Will Rogers
Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
Will Rogers
My favorite sports quote was, I think Jim Robinson.... Coach of the Putrid Tampa Bay Bucs. When a reporter asked “ What do you think about your team’ s execution?”
His reply, “I’m in favor of it!”
Or maybe, Tug McGraw, first relief pitcher to get a million dollar contract. When aske how he’d spend the money, he replied, “I’ll spend most of it on whiskey and wild women. I’ll probably Judy blow the rest.” :-)
Bump Worsley, NY Rangers goaltender in the 1950s was asked which team gave him the most trouble. Without hesitation, he said:”Tthe NY Rangers”.
***I’ll probably Judy blow the rest.” :-)***
LOL!
OK Tim, let’s JUDY wait to see how long it takes the “grammar police” to show up;)
sod
bookmark saturday sports
A reporter asked about keeping players dialed in with so much attention on the program.
And Saban let loose.
“I said the same thing as when y'all buried us last week, aight, and all that,” Saban said. “It really doesn't matter what you think. It doesn't really matter what you say. And I'm hoping nobody on our team is playing for you. I hope they're playing for each other and their team and what they want to accomplish and not what you think because that's not certainly what I'm doing. I'm coach and working for our players and our team to be as good as it can be. And if that's not pleasing to somebody else, it's not pleasing to somebody else.
"And it's not going to be for you. The fans, yes. Because if it was up to you, we're six-foot under already. We're dead and buried and gone, gone."
http://www.al.com/alabamafootball/index.ssf/2015/10/heated_nick_saban_to_media_if.html
A Mariners reliever years ago during Griffey, Jr’s rookie year (I think his name was Holman):
“High School cost Griffey two years on his pension”
That was a great one.
Thanks! Great way to start a morning!
I believe it was Baltimore Colts defensive lineman “Fatso” Donovan who told a story on hard living quarterback Bobby Lane.
He tackled Lane during the second half of a game the Colts were easily winning.
He looked at Lane and asked “Bobby, did you start drinking at halftime?”
He said Bobby shook his head and answered “the way this team is playing I start drinking BEFORE the game.”
I remember one football player who, when being asked by a smug newspaper reporter if he’ d majored in basket-weaving in college, replied “No. I wasn’ t smart enough for basket-weaving. I had to major in journalism.”
John McKay. Jim Robinson owns FreeRepublic.com.
still not in the “Lee Elia” class.
My Favorite Will Rodgers
” The game of golf has made liars out of more people than the IRS “
Ping Bodie when asked how Babe Ruth was as a room mate
I don’t know I room with Babe Ruth’s Suitcase
Ex NHL coach “If he lost another step, he’d be skating backwards”
“My teeth weren’t that good to begin with, so hopefully I can get some better ones.”
Blackhawks defenseman Duncan Keith after losing more teeth during a game.
Lol. Thanks. I knew it wasn’t right, but I was in a hurry
It’s still funny
Ugh. Auto correct fail on an iPhone without my glasses on the morning after a big party.
That’s my story ... I’m sticking to it.
John McKay - “I had a five-year plan” he said about his work in building the Buccaneers and taking them to the NFC Championship Game in just their fourth season. “But that was because I had a five-year contract. If I had had a three-year contract, I would have had a three year plan.”
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