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[satire] Pope Says He Will Address Sex Abuse Scandal Once Hes Finished Talking About Climate Change
The Babylon Bee ^ | 8/16/2018

Posted on 08/16/2018 7:24:53 PM PDT by Beave Meister

VATICAN CITY—In his first public statement on the horrifying, devastating report on sexual abuse within the Catholic Church, Pope Francis stated he would address the controversy in detail once he’s done talking about climate change for a few more weeks.

The head of the Roman Catholic Church claimed he is deeply concerned with the tragic report, but is “just too swamped” with work fighting climate change, criticizing capitalism, and advocating for other issues of social justice to talk about the repulsive report at the moment.

“Rest assured, once I have exhausted my talking points on the need for government policies to crack down on their carbon footprints, we’ll start looking this report over,” he said. “Then I’ll be sure to make a statement on it. We just didn’t want to jump to conclusions too early, something that we’re not concerned about with man-made climate change. Just with this.”

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: catholicchurch; climatechange; globalwarming; gullabull; pedophiles; pope; popefrancis; romancatholics; satire; sexscandal; sexualabuse; vatican; vaticancity
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Don't just read the the caption...read the article...it's short and disturbing.
1 posted on 08/16/2018 7:24:53 PM PDT by Beave Meister
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To: Beave Meister

Short, disturbing, and satire. Where’s the tag?


2 posted on 08/16/2018 7:26:46 PM PDT by TheZMan (I am a secessionist.)
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To: Beave Meister

So never, in other words?


3 posted on 08/16/2018 7:26:57 PM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet (You cannot invade the mainland US. There'd be a rifle behind every blade of grass.)
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To: Beave Meister

Satire site.


4 posted on 08/16/2018 7:26:59 PM PDT by ButThreeLeftsDo (Free Republic Needs Your Monthly Donations!!!)
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To: Beave Meister

Great. Another bought off liberal politician.


5 posted on 08/16/2018 7:28:12 PM PDT by samadams2000 (Someone important make......The Call!)
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To: Beave Meister

I am so so so sorry. I did not know this is a satire....


6 posted on 08/16/2018 7:29:49 PM PDT by Beave Meister (Leave the gun. Take the cannoli....)
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To: Beave Meister
This guy is a howling at the moon lunatic. Obviously he never read

Genesis 8:22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.

7 posted on 08/16/2018 7:30:53 PM PDT by Just mythoughts
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To: Beave Meister

Love me some Bee.

Best satire site in the World.

“Captured Russian spy found to contain smaller spies nested inside”

“Calvinist dog tells his owner ‘No one is really a good boy’”


8 posted on 08/16/2018 7:35:34 PM PDT by PlateOfShrimp
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To: Beave Meister

It was maybe written as a satire, but unfortunately it is also true.


9 posted on 08/16/2018 7:35:53 PM PDT by Innovative ("Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing." -- Vince Lombardi)
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To: Beave Meister

One could only hope the Pope knows more about his religion than he does about science.
He currently displays imbecile knowledge on both, it appears.


10 posted on 08/16/2018 7:36:54 PM PDT by Da Coyote
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To: Beave Meister

It should be noted that although Pennsylvania’s report is out, Philedelphia’s report hasn’t been released yet. It will get worse.


11 posted on 08/16/2018 7:38:07 PM PDT by aimhigh (1 John 3:23)
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To: Beave Meister
The Babylon Bee is a satire site.

The Babylon Bee is Your Trusted Source For Christian News Satire.
12 posted on 08/16/2018 7:38:36 PM PDT by stylin19a (Best.Election.Of.All-Times.Ever.In.The.History.Of.Ever)
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To: stylin19a

Thought it was Mr. Ellison.


13 posted on 08/16/2018 7:40:47 PM PDT by DIRTYSECRET (urope. Why do they put up with this.)
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To: Beave Meister

Bwahahahaha

The communist pope continues his distraction of the Catholic Church and the cardinals stand by and do nothing


14 posted on 08/16/2018 7:42:38 PM PDT by Nifster (I see puppy dogs in the clouds)
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To: Beave Meister

Climate change caused those priests to do what they did I guess.


15 posted on 08/16/2018 7:42:49 PM PDT by SkyDancer ( ~ Just Consider Me A Random Fact Generator ~ Eat Sleep Fly Repeat ~)
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To: ButThreeLeftsDo

Ooops yes it is. They get me every time


16 posted on 08/16/2018 7:43:29 PM PDT by Nifster (I see puppy dogs in the clouds)
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To: Beave Meister

Incredible.


17 posted on 08/16/2018 7:48:55 PM PDT by GOP Poet
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To: PlateOfShrimp

Best satire site in the World.

This headline should have been a hint that it deals in parody:
“Death Penalty Still Permissible For People Who Drive Slowly In The Left Lane, Pope Francis Clarifies”

:D


18 posted on 08/16/2018 7:53:20 PM PDT by LouieFisk
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To: Beave Meister

Lock him up!


19 posted on 08/16/2018 8:25:00 PM PDT by bramps (It's the Islam, stupid!)
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To: Beave Meister

Satire is at it’s best when you get sucked-in because it is plausible.


20 posted on 08/16/2018 8:26:15 PM PDT by bigbob (Trust Sessions. Trust the Plan.)
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