Skip to comments.The Guild 4-12-2003 Hair Spray Saves the Day!
Posted on 04/12/2003 4:04:21 AM PDT by BigWaveBetty
A man was blissfully driving along the highway, when he saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the Bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place. Candy, too.
The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and got out to see that the colorful little Bunny was dead. The driver felt guilty and began to cry.
A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong.
"I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?"
The woman told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead Bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can onto the poor little bunny.
Miraculously the Easter Bunny came to back life, jumped up, picked up the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped on down the road. Fifty yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned round, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards turned, waved, hopped another 50 yards and waved again!!!!
The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heavens name is in your spray can? What was it that you sprayed on the Easter Bunny?"
The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: "Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."
Whew, what a whirlwind day. Took an unexpected trip to see my 39-year-old cousin in the hospital facing a balloon angioplasty tomorrow for two blocked arteries. That was three hours of driving on which I hadn't planned, but it was good to see him, anyway.
The French are beyond comprehension:
Mr. Lebel staunchly opposed the war yet appreciated the removal of a tyrant. The words that came to his mind when asked about American motives were dark: "hegemony," the "imperial idea" and "guardian of the world," he said. "If something threatens you, you have to eliminate it," he said. "It is justified politically; humanly, less so." Mr. Lebel said he remained convinced that alternatives existed to war like "the United Nations inspections, maybe freezing Saddam Hussein's assets."
Those "alternatives" were tried for 12 years, and proved ineffective and worthless. How long does it take a Frenchman to realize that he's wasting his time engaging in futile efforts, and what did he think would be effective in removing said tyrant, if not force? link These people are morons. Good grief, and/or zut alors!
JL, ROTFLOL! Poor rabbit.
mountaineer, I'm sorry to hear about you cousin, I'll say a few prayers for him. 39 is awfully young to need angioplasty.
What is the matter with the French??? Why don't they just refer to us as an evil empire and be done with it!
They are okay with the fact Saddam is gone, but they don't like the way we handled things? We know the French way is to surrender, how effective a course of action would that be? The French are like the democratic party, many complaints about how things are done, but possessing no realistic workable solutions to the problems at hand.
But when it came time to eat dinner, Saddam was served his food on the official fine china of the Kuwaiti royal family, complete with the family seal and gold and maroon trim.
I hope the Kuwaiti royal family gets their china back.
Top secret documents obtained by The Telegraph in Baghdad show that Russia provided Saddam Hussein's regime with wide-ranging assistance in the months leading up to the war, including intelligence on private conversations between Tony Blair and other Western leaders.
Moscow also provided Saddam with lists of assassins available for "hits" in the West and details of arms deals to neighbouring countries. The two countries also signed agreements to share intelligence, help each other to "obtain" visas for agents to go to other countries and to exchange information on the activities of Osama bin Laden, the al-Qa'eda leader.
The documents detailing the extent of the links between Russia and Saddam were obtained from the heavily bombed headquarters of the Iraqi intelligence service in Baghdad yesterday.
The documents, in Arabic, are mostly intelligence reports from anonymous agents and from the Iraqi embassy in Moscow. Tony Blair is referred to in a report dated March 5, 2002 and marked: "Subject - SECRET." In the letter, an Iraqi intelligence official explains that a Russian colleague had passed him details of a private conversation between Mr Blair and Silvio Berlusconi, the Italian prime minister, at a meeting in Rome. The two had met for an annual summit on February 15, 2002, in Rome.
The document says that Mr Blair "referred to the negative things decided by the United States over Baghdad". It adds that Mr Blair refused to engage in any military action in Iraq at that time because British forces were still in Afghanistan and that nothing could be done until after the new Kabul government had been set up. More at above link.
Pooty Poot, you're low life backstabbing scum and your mother dresses you.
Good news? News to be released on the 7 POW's by Gen Tommy Franks in the next 12 hours.
From cnn:Six U.S. prisoners of war found alive by the U.S. Marines near Tikrit, a military source tells a reporter embedded with the U.S. Army. CNN working to confirm.
It was not clear if the soldiers were prisoners of war or missing in action, Franks said.
James Kitfield, a reporter embedded with the U.S. Army's V Corps in the Iraqi capital, told CNN that the U.S. Marines found the U.S soldiers alive north of Baghdad.
Officially, the Pentagon lists seven American POWs -- five members of a U.S. Army maintenance convoy that was ambushed March 23 and the pilots of an Apache helicopter that was shot down March 24. Six others are listed as missing in action.
The Marines had been moving north in the direction of Tikrit, Saddam Hussein's ancestral homeland and the last major Iraqi city that is not under coalition control.
The 1st Marine Expeditionary force had been operating in the vicinity of Tikrit, where its mission was to "attack and destroy any type of regime forces in the area," a spokesman for U.S. Central Command said.
CNN Correspondent Brent Sadler, one of the few Western journalists to travel to the immediate outskirts of Tikrit, said the town looked abandoned -- with no military movement and only a few civilians on the road. Highway signs bearing the deposed Iraqi leader's image were still intact.
He spent about 2 1/2 hours touring the outskirts of the town with a photographer, translator and bodyguard, and decided to enter the town after residents assured him there was no fighting there. (Full story)