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DATE RAPE! DID YOU SEE WHAT I SAW?
CookingWithCarlo.com ^ | Oct 16 2003 | Carlo3b Dad, Chef, Author

Posted on 10/15/2003 10:05:10 PM PDT by carlo3b

 

DATE RAPE!  DID YOU SEE WHAT I SAW?


Did he or didn't he?  Has our compassion for an alleged victim in a particular type of crime, allowed our Bill of Rights to go past due! 

Did she or didn't she?  It appears there are more the a few Americans that are now beginning to rethink the compassionate laws that awarded unquestioned protections, to unproved accusations. It has become obvious that these well meaning measures may have gone too far. Has today's culture allowed itself to believe only one side of a conflict where a woman is considered, without ever hearing the other? Are all men sexual brutes?

Would a woman lie?

"It is a besetting vice of democracies to substitute public opinion for law. This is the usual form in which masses (of men) exhibit their tyranny."
-James Fenimore Cooper

Men, I learned early on were by nature, bigger, stronger, and much more aggressive than women. The men in my life, great grandfather, grandfathers, uncles, and even neighbors were our protectors, safe keepers, and providers. They were to be emulated, learned from, looked up to. Men were a defense against anything that threatened us. Most men that I knew were good. They loved us, even if they never really said so. I loved the men in my life, because they were good, because the women in my home wouldn't allow them to behave any other way.

Where all men good, and by default, were all boys nice guys? Of course not, and I found that out the hard way.

"If you can learn from hard knocks, you can also learn from soft touches."
-Carolyn Kenmore

I was taught from birth, that women were always looking out for my best interest. My mother, grandmother, great grandmother, aunts and yes even my teachers were all there to help me. I didn't always agree with them, but I never for a moment doubted their veracity. Women were the soft ones, the good smelling, caring and tender people in our lives. Why would they want to hurt me, I loved them and they all loved me.

Were all women, and by default all little girls, always good?  Well, as I grew up, I began to discover that girls much like boys, are not always nice. So what happened to make things change?  That came later.

"The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping of females begins when the doctor says: 'It's a girl.'"
-Shirley Chisholm

Although women were smaller, and mostly weaker in a physical sense, they were not pushovers. Our mothers, and all adult women in our family were the benevolent dictators over everything within the home and family, and that included the men and boys. I didn't have any sisters, but my friends did and they became wiser, a lot sooner in the ways of the world where females were concerned than I did. What I didn't grasp until much later was that not all females were like my mother, and that mothers, acted like females to other people, but never us.

"We create an environment where it is alright to hate, to steal, to cheat, and to lie if we dress it up with symbols of respectability, dignity and love."
-Whitney Moore, Jr.

Can and do men and boys take advantage of smaller and weaker people? Yes, of course. Does that include women? Absolutely!  Does that include sex?  Without a doubt.

Ergo, all men always take advantage of everyone, especially women, in every case, without question, were sex is concerned!

That is absolutely absurd, and would be laughable if it wasn't so frightening. However, in most states in The United States of America, in the case of an accusation of sexual assault, a man is considered guilty, and is treated as such, until and if he can prove otherwise. However, he must never accuse the accuser of any motive other than of that misinterpretation of his disgusting intentions.

"There are no facts, only interpretations."
-Friedrich Nietzsche

Innocent Until Proven Guilty? Not a chance. Presumed innocence? Not in the current court of public opinion, and not in too many criminal courts of law either. A man is not allowed to proffer any questions or produce evidence of a pattern of behavior that casts any doubt on the accuser.

Thus, a man must present a defense that casts him as unethical, uncaring, and a vicious beast who perpetuates the accusation, promotes the stereotype, and confirms in public the appearance of guilt, beyond a shadow of doubt.

"The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it."
-Albert Einstein

Does it happen, that men, evil men, not only can and in some cases, do rape and brutalize women? You bet they do and when proven, the law should treat them in the strongest punishments allowable by law. A woman should be given an unencumbered opportunity to bring to justice anyone, that takes advantage of them and their bodies. They should be allowed to bring into court any pertinent evidence that casts the perpetrator in as damaging a light as the law allows.

It is true that filthy crimes of this nature are seldom committed in public where witnesses can collaborate an accusation.  However, this is true of most serious crimes, and that unfortunate fact, does not change the burden of proof.

A man, or a woman for that matter, presumably enters court innocent until proven otherwise. In such cases the accuser can bring into court any past behavior or a propensity to commit such a crime. Thus is the character of our court system, and the reason we have juries of our peers, to weigh the facts, and dispense the entitled punishment, or exonerate. Nothing should interfere with the process that we have in place.

This is not a unique position that I propose.. It was the law of the land...



TOPICS: Constitution/Conservatism; Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Editorial; Front Page News; Government; News/Current Events; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: accused; rape
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To: Alamo-Girl
All I think anyone wants is a far trial.. no leg up, no assumptions, generalizations, or any predetermined bias. We have been sliding down a slippery slope for far too long. Men are not always wrong, just as women haven't been abused far too often.

I don't know if Kobe, a rich dumb jock, did it because I haven't a clue, but this nonsense that we can't cast dispersions on his accuser because women who claim victim hood in sex aren't to be doubted. That is as criminal as it is absurd.

41 posted on 10/16/2003 10:45:25 AM PDT by carlo3b (http://www.CookingWithCarlo.com)
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To: christie
 You can flame me all you want, but it's about time for both men and women to take some responsibility.

PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY???
GASP!
HOW DARE YOU?


42 posted on 10/16/2003 10:52:34 AM PDT by carlo3b (http://www.CookingWithCarlo.com)
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To: aruanan
Is it not a "fact" that Nietzche loved to outrage? Is it also not a "fact" that if someone blows my head off, I am then dead?
43 posted on 10/16/2003 10:53:16 AM PDT by justshutupandtakeit (America's Enemies foreign and domestic agree: Bush must be destroyed.)
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To: carlo3b
I especially want to be pinged on the diet stuff - not that I have a fat butt or anything.
44 posted on 10/16/2003 10:54:18 AM PDT by Saundra Duffy (For victory & freedom!!!)
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To: Saundra Duffy
not that I have a fat butt or anything.

Who said that? I didn't say that... butt .. LOLOLOLOL You are on my list of women to watch!..I'll ping ya some time. *<]:)

45 posted on 10/16/2003 10:57:44 AM PDT by carlo3b (http://www.CookingWithCarlo.com)
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To: carlo3b
I'm one of those who believes the jury ought to have access to whatever they wish to know. The fact that judges via motions in limini (sp?) and legislators by act can limit evidence is troubling to me --- whether a criminal or civil trial. Even in a simple business law case, a judge can utterly destroy either side by his pre-trial rulings.
46 posted on 10/16/2003 11:00:26 AM PDT by Alamo-Girl
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To: Alamo-Girl
whether a criminal or civil trial. Even in a simple business law case, a judge can utterly destroy either side by his pre-trial rulings.

Therein is the problem, we have wandered astray far way from the actual law and have now found ourselves deciding what was the intent, or the hidden meanings behind the laws.. BS. It depends too much on self-imposed filters, and strangled interpretations.

47 posted on 10/16/2003 11:07:53 AM PDT by carlo3b (http://www.CookingWithCarlo.com)
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To: Howlin
Colorado law demands that permission be granted by the judge before the claims are made public. Kobe's attorney failed to do that and just went ahead with her outrageous charges.
48 posted on 10/16/2003 11:14:39 AM PDT by OldFriend (DEMS INHABIT A PARALLEL UNIVERSE)
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To: christie
Yup, she asked for it. Went into the room with a man......got what she deserved. How dare she.......and those provocative yellow panties....worse than Monica's thong.
49 posted on 10/16/2003 11:15:59 AM PDT by OldFriend (DEMS INHABIT A PARALLEL UNIVERSE)
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To: justshutupandtakeit
Is it not a "fact" that Nietzche loved to outrage? Is it also not a "fact" that if someone blows my head off, I am then dead?

So it would appear. The point of "there are no facts, only interpretations" is that too many people too blithely believe that their characterization of their own percepts is the same thing as an independently existing reality. They're not. They may be close; they may be close most of the time; they may be sufficiently close most of the time, but they're not the same. Something like this can be seen in a poster on a Cubs game thread who said, "Baseball is boring" as though the predicate were an intrinsic property of the subject rather than an unwitting description of his own reaction to the subject.
He's a lot more right than you think. You can posit that a certain relationship or characteristic exists on its own apart from anyone's perception and call it a "fact." You can further posit that if it is perceived by different people with similar abilities under similar circumstances they'll all come up with a similar description and call that similar description a "fact." However, as soon as someone has taken his percept and compared and contrasted it with his previous experiences in the context of his intellectual abilities and formulated a description of what he experienced, he has produced an interpretation of his percept. If there are enough similar descriptions under similar circumstances, people say that a "fact" has been established. This, of course, may or may not be true, but whatever the case, the consistency lies in their interpretation of what they believe they experienced.

50 posted on 10/16/2003 11:17:00 AM PDT by aruanan
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To: christie
But the concept that all you have to do is say NO at the last moment and all is well is insane. That's like standing in front of a freight train, whispering "Stop."

Well said. Or a pedestrian expecting that right-of-way rules will protect him from a truck. It seems, unfortunately, that because a woman has "a right to say no" at any point in a sexual encouter, that some girls believe this will actually ensure their safety. Philosophy is full of rights that can be mighty difficult to enforce.

I take no position on whether this young woman was raped; there's simply too much conflicting "evidence" being offered. However, she's unquestionably an object lesson for other women who'd like to avoid rape. My lecture would start "Don't do a single thing that Miss X did."

51 posted on 10/16/2003 11:21:03 AM PDT by Tax-chick (Where am I? Who are all these kids, and why are they calling me Mom?)
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To: aruanan
YEAH.. what you said!.. :)
52 posted on 10/16/2003 11:23:25 AM PDT by carlo3b (http://www.CookingWithCarlo.com)
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To: carlo3b
Sex is an act that involves two people......I have to ask myself why the law only affords legal recourse to one of them if the act is not performed to her liking. In the interest of "sexual equality," I've come up with an option. Maybe men should be given equal time by allowing them to bring charges against female sexual partners for "being a bad lay." That way, the playing field would be leveled and both participants could enter into the act with the fear of legal charges hanging over their heads......wouldn't that make sex fun???
53 posted on 10/16/2003 11:34:54 AM PDT by freedox
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To: carlo3b
That is particularly sad with regard to the tortured interpretation of the Constitution.
54 posted on 10/16/2003 12:16:06 PM PDT by Alamo-Girl
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To: christie
what a great post!
55 posted on 10/16/2003 12:23:40 PM PDT by Queen Jadis
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To: freedox
Sex is an act that involves two people..

What? What happened to the other 7?.. Sheeeesh ..Youth.. :@)

56 posted on 10/16/2003 1:00:45 PM PDT by carlo3b (http://www.CookingWithCarlo.com)
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To: OldFriend
Yup, she asked for it. Went into the room with a man......got what she deserved. How dare she.......and those provocative yellow panties....worse than Monica's thong.

I don't think I ever said she got what she deserved. That is the argument to stop the discussion that there are consequences to conduct.

No woman (or child or boy for that matter) deserves to be raped. It's a horrible crime. And a crime it is. And it should be severely punished.

But in a generic sense, I wish we would find some common sense and dignity in our behavior. Being taught that you can just say no is crazy. Yes, women have the right to say no, but changing her mind midstream and then charging rape is not right.

When it becomes a he said, she said situation, the defendant should have every right to defend himself.

57 posted on 10/16/2003 2:17:51 PM PDT by christie (http://www.clintonlegacycookbook.com)
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To: Queen Jadis
Thanks.
58 posted on 10/16/2003 2:18:40 PM PDT by christie (http://www.clintonlegacycookbook.com)
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To: carlo3b
Great essay, carlo!

(cough)

Collaborate: to work jointly with others
Corroborate: to support with evidence

:-p
59 posted on 10/16/2003 3:22:38 PM PDT by mamaduck (I follow a New Age Guru . . . from 2000 years ago.)
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To: carlo3b
Good piece. Pinging for a later read.
60 posted on 10/16/2003 3:28:58 PM PDT by Buggman (Jesus Saves--the rest of you take full damage.)
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