Palestinian woman kills daughter to restore family's 'honor'

http://www.charlotte.com/mld/charlotte/news/ ^

[Stew Padasso]

Palestinian woman kills daughter to restore family's 'honor'

BY SORAYA SARHADDI NELSON Knight Ridder Newspapers

ABU QASH, West Bank - Rofayda Qaoud - raped by her brothers and impregnated - refused to commit suicide, her mother recalls, even after she bought the unwed teenager a razor with which to slit her wrists. So Amira Abu Hanhan Qaoud says she did what she believes any good Palestinian parent would: restored her family's "honor" through murder.

Armed with a plastic bag, razor and wooden stick, Qaoud entered her sleeping daughter's room last Jan. 27. "Tonight you die, Rofayda," she told the girl, before wrapping the bag tightly around her head. Next, Qaoud sliced Rofayda's wrists, ignoring her muffled pleas of "No, mother, no!" After her daughter went limp, Qaoud struck her in the head with the stick.

Killing her sixth-born child took 20 minutes, Qaoud tells a visitor through a stream of tears and cigarettes that she smokes in rapid succession. "She killed me before I killed her," says the 43-year-old mother of nine. "I had to protect my children. This is the only way I could protect my family's honor."

The guilty brothers are in jail.

Qaoud's confessed crime, for which she must appear before a three-judge panel on Dec. 3, is one repeated almost weekly among Palestinians living in the West Bank, Gaza Strip and Israel. Female virtue and virginity define a family's reputation in Arab cultures, so it's women who are punished if that reputation is perceived as sullied.

Victims' rights groups say the number of "honor crimes" appears to be climbing, but at the same time, getting little attention. Israelis and Palestinians are too busy with political and military issues to notice what they dismiss as domestic disputes, says Suad Abu-Dayyeh, who works for the Women's Center for Legal Aid and Counseling in East Jerusalem.

Poverty and war have exacerbated the problem, says Nadera Shalhoub-Kevorkian, a social work and criminology professor at Hebrew University in Jerusalem and an expert on violence against women.

"Men do not have any power except over women," she says.

Police in Israel investigated at least 18 honor killings in the past three years.

Palestinian police reported 31 cases in 2002 - up from five during the first half of 1999 - the last time such incidents were counted before the current Palestinian uprising began, according to the center's study.

But the number of killings is likely higher, given that Palestinian police investigate only crimes that have been reported, said Yousef Tarifi, the Ramallah prosecutor assigned to Qaoud's case. Shalhoub-Kevorkian says her past research showed the likely number to be 15 times higher than the number of reported cases.

Legal authority on the West Bank has been weakened by Israel's military crackdown, and the growing influence of militant Islamic factions has led clans to dole out their own justice. "In this chaotic situation, every man who thinks he knows a little bit of the Quran … thinks honor issues are supposed to be resolved by killing," says Shalhoub-Kevorkian, who adds that leading Muslim clerics in Jerusalem and Jordan have denounced such killings.

Qaoud says her husband, Abdul Rahim, 52, told her the Quran forbade such killings. But neither his pleas nor those of Palestinian crisis counselors swayed her. "Why did she accept what happened to her?" Qaoud asks. "Even a wife can tell her husband `no.' "

According to court records, Rofayda was raped by her brothers, Fahdi, 22, and Ali, 20, in a bedroom they shared in the family's three-room house. On Nov. 26, 2002, doctors at a nearby hospital who were treating Rofayda for an injured leg discovered she was eight months pregnant.

Palestinian authorities whisked her off to a women's shelter in Bethlehem, where she gave birth to a healthy boy on Dec. 23. He has since been adopted by another Palestinian family, court records show.

Rofayda, meanwhile, wanted to return to her parents in the Ramallah suburb of Abu Qash. Ramallah Gov. Mustafa Isa called a meeting with the family and village elders, demanding they pledge in writing not to harm the girl. "He asked me if everyone in the family and the village would promise not to bother this girl, but I told him I couldn't give him a guarantee," Abu Qash Mayor Faik Shalout says.

Rofayda returned home in late January without notifying the authorities.

The shame was unbearable, Qaoud said. Relatives and friends refused to speak to her family. Her elder daughters' husbands wouldn't allow them to visit because Rofayda had returned home.

On Jan. 27, Rofayda sent word that she was in danger to crisis counselors at Abu-Dayyeh's center in East Jerusalem. They, in turn, called Palestinian police in Ramallah, who have jurisdiction over Abu Qash. The police said they couldn't get to the Qaoud home because of Israeli checkpoints.

Qaoud, meanwhile, sent her husband, who suffers from heart disease, to a doctor in the nearby village of Bir Zeit. Her three youngest children went to a cousin's house.

At 11:30 p.m. she killed Rofayda, court records show. Tarifi says he's convinced Qaoud had an accomplice, but Qaoud insists she acted alone.

Qaoud turned herself in and, after four months in jail, was released pending the resolution of her case.

While honor killings committed in the heat of the moment - for example, by a husband who catches his wife in bed with another man - generally carry a six-month to one-year jail term, Qaoud will likely be sentenced to three to five years in prison, Tarifi says. The fact she is a mother who was trying to protect her family's honor mitigates the crime of premeditated murder, which is punishable by death under Palestinian law, he adds.

The brothers are serving minimum 10-year sentences in a Palestinian jail in the West Bank city of Jericho for statutory rape of a relative, Tarifi says.

No trace of Rofayda or her brothers remains in the family home. Qaoud says she ripped up all of their photographs and burned their clothes. The bedroom in which she killed her daughter is now a storeroom.

Erasing the memories is harder, she admits. She eases her pain by doting on her three children still living at home, especially the youngest, Fatima, 9, whom she lavishes with kisses. The children say they've forgiven Qaoud and return her affection.

"My mother did this because she does not want us to be punished by people," Fatima explains with a shy smile. Leaning into Qaoud's arms, the little girl adds: "I love my mother much more now than before."

[Stew Padasso]

Maybe we just don't "understand" their culture? </liberal pantywaste>

[BCrago66]

That's just plain old fashioned Palistinian family values.

[HELLRAISER II]

A mothers love from the Religion of Peace. POS Bi+ch! I say lets give them their Crusades that they keep accusing us of.

[Moose4]

You have to love it when Muslims do the work to show that the Judeo-Christian culture of the West is superior to their own.

}:-)4

[Lijahsbubbe]

sick story posted here

[Eric in the Ozarks]

Gimme that old time religion...

[Enterprise]

If they're so damned concerned about their "honor" they should just kill themselves instead of other family members. Then they can brag to God about how wonderful they are.

[MEG33]

I simply can't think of anything to say except that this is so sad...that a mother blames a child for being raped and kills her to preserve honor.I just can't understand how this culture was evolved.Here the parent might try to kill the rapist,and be punished for doing so.

[agrace]

Despicable.

[TonyWojo]

raped by her brothers

How was honor restored?

[Enterprise]

Ditto. Why don't they kill her rapist brothers instead?

[netmilsmom]

All I have to say is that this girl is in heaven and God is hugging her. He is telling how wrong her mother was for killing her and her unborn child.

Barbarians.

[witnesstothefall]

Don't expect to see Reuters to mention this. They only print what the Pali's say they can.

[MontanaBeth]

What is about this religion that we are suppose to understand? These people scare me.

[Hodar]

Rofayda Qaoud - raped by her brothers and impregnated - refused to commit suicide, her mother recalls, even after she bought the unwed teenager a razor with which to slit her wrists.

What a little ingrate.... < /sarcasm>

Oh, were are the liberals who tell us over and over that our culture is not superior to any other culture; they are just 'different'.

[drypowder]

Honor murder of one's own child no less. "Islam" is in dire need of change.

[joesnuffy]

Arafat and Powell should give her a medal....for a lifetime Palestinian Achievement award
her family name is restored...a credit to her religion...a role model for Islamic mom's everywhere

[Terriergal]

ABU QASH, West Bank - Rofayda Qaoud - raped by her brothers and impregnated - refused to commit suicide, her mother recalls, even after she bought the unwed teenager a razor with which to slit her wrists. So Amira Abu Hanhan Qaoud says she did what she believes any good Palestinian parent would: restored her family's "honor" through murder

She didn't give the boys the razors to cut their own wrists? That would have been far more effective IMO.

Returning to my mantras now...

...ohmmmmm.... Islam is a peaceful and loving religion.... ohmmm.....

[Ditter]

I read this yesterday. Pathetic!

[Terriergal]

Doesn't it strike you as odd/irrational that the *girl* was the child she chose to murder? Go figure! Kill the victim. What justice!

[Terriergal]

Makes me furious then when Americans defend these monsters as being 'oppressed' -- they are CHOOSING to be oppressed by living like animals. "Kill or be killed" "If it feels good, do it" - they aren't any better than the excesses they see in the 'great Shetan' (America) that they purport to hate so much.

[Terriergal]

over and over that our culture is not superior to any other culture; they are just 'different'.

Well, we have our problems too -- you know, like not giving enough welfare to the poor, etc... [/sarcasm]

To be honest, though sure we have people that are violent, that exploit and abuse others - but we don't have explicit religious and governmental sanction of such behavior as yet (except in the case of unborn babies).

[KC_for_Freedom]

This post needs to be saved so that we have a ready reference when we say our culture is superior and we really need to win this war.

[from occupied ga]

West Bank - Rofayda Qaoud - raped by her brothers and impregnated

Was this in West Virginia?

[Alouette]

At least, in the Old Testament, when a girl was raped (Dinah) her brothers went out and killed the rapist and all his friends.

[TheOtherOne]

and her unborn child.

Story says child was adopted.

[drypowder]

odd/irrational

That works. So does sick, sad, stupid, dumb, moronic...... Just think, middle eastern countries are full of these kinds of people wanting us to change and follow Alah, or they kill us. Too bad the alphabit news stations won't speak to this because the pacifist folks really ought to understand what confronts us.

[XJarhead]

Well, it should be noted that she's going to jail for this for some years, so its not like this is condoned.

[Stew Padasso]

"Qaoud will likely be sentenced to three to five years in prison"

That is not punishment.

[netmilsmom]

I'm sorry, I was so credulous I missed that the child was adopted. Thanks for the correction!

[stuartcr]

Is honor a concept worth dying/killing over?

[Moleman]

I just can't understand how this culture was evolved It hasn't evolved one bit, it's primitive and barbaric. (but a peaceful religion of course)

[Moose4]

Is honor a concept worth dying/killing over?

You bet it is.

The real question is, what kind of a barbaric culture could imagine that killing your own daughter after she was raped BY YOUR OWN SONS could restore any sort of "honor"?

Western Judeo-Christian culture is superior to Middle Eastern Islam. It just is. (And if that makes me a racist, so be it.) But no world leader today--not even the majority of Jewish and Christian leaders--has the nads to say this truth.

When Ann Coulter said, "We should kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity," she was closer to the truth than many people care to think about. At least, we need to break the stranglehold Islam has over these people and give Christianity a chance to take root.

}:-)4

[stuartcr]

Who gets to determine the definition of honor and what it takes to restore it?

[Terriergal]

It's very sad that it even has to be said. :-( It seems pretty obvious when you look at the facts.

Then again, the libs are working to even the playing field and make our culture just as bad as everyone else's.

[Terriergal]

odd/irrational

That works. So does sick, sad, stupid, dumb, moronic

I tend to understate at times for effect. :-)

Too bad the alphabit news stations won't speak to this because the pacifist folks really ought to understand what confronts us.

Most people (including the media) are in denial that there is real human evil in the world - they always want to blame someone else and think that if X person would just stop being 'bad' to another person, then person Y wouldn't grow up to be bad. It ain't that simple, and besides, if you always can blame someone else for the evil you do, then the ones you blam can do the same, and nothing will ever be solved.

But the media sits and plays "see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil" when it comes to REAL evil. Instead they vilify those trying to do good, and call it evil.

[MacDorcha]

the child was born. this is after the birth that she returned, and was later killed.

[dfwgator]

Well at least look at the bright side, she decided not to use the baby as a suicide bomber.

[MacDorcha]

yes. but they dont know what honour is. i doubt they ever will.

for example. in the japanes culture, suicide is the only response to significant disgrace. (the kind that would jeopordize your family or a figure head). thats fine by my standards, even though i do not wish nor will i practice it. however. murder, especially of a family memeber has never been seen as honourable. the only honourable killing comes in war or necessity.

i just write this case off as a woman having a 15 years later abortion. she didnt want to cope with it, so she took a life rather than love it.

[MacDorcha]

it's punishment over there, but it still isnt enough. the jails over there dont know about human rights, which is good, but its only 5 years. make it 50 and we'll talk.

[pdunkin]

wooo hooo was that funny!!!!!! maybe next, instead of those snappy one-liners, you'll regale us with stories of how your Uncle Dad impregnated Aunt Sister and produced you. I can hardly wait.

[stuartcr]

You know what honour is, but those that think differently than you don't?....suicide is ok, because losing face is worth dying over? A murder that is considered a necessity is not?

[MacDorcha]

in a nut shell, then again, i am deeply in love with my heritage. Scotch-Norse. Honour is imbred. face and virtue are all you know in life. they are worth more than all but love.

i didnt say suicide was ok to me. i said that it is the persons choice. i have no pity for a suicide case, but i have no care if they do it either. it is a councious choice of someone in trouble. i once almost commited it myself, but found that to be a wrong choice for me.

call me cold hearted if you want, but i tell you, i have no greater passion than for the love of those dearest to me. if my actions should bring to much pain in their lives, i see suicide as a viable option to end it if need be. self sacrifice is the message here. SELF being the focus. agree or not with what i have to say, it is my standard. it has served me well, and made me feel at ease when others have been pained.

dont question my view of honour either. those who doubt honour just because it isnt their view of it have no view of honour, and thus, no honour.

[MacDorcha]

EXACTLY! :) well stated my man.

[MacDorcha]

who gets to determine love for that matter then? why are we here? what is God trully like? abstract thought has driven us for centuries. if you can't grasp it, i must say that society has had little effect of making you a man.

[cavtrooper21]

Nope, in WV it's willing, no rape involved...

Family tradition and all that... ;^)

[Jorge]

Reminds me of what Jesus said about the Pharisee hypocrites..who would "strain on a gnat and yet swallow a camel."

What warped mind would consider murder better than grace and compassion toward a rape victim.

These people are sick. No wonder their society is so stunted.

[bray]

Yeah, ol ma was savin her young virgin for some old mulla to rape and give her some extra allah points. What a sick religion satan has enslaven these people with.

Pray for GW and Iraq's Religious Freedom

[from occupied ga]

Uncle Dad impregnated Aunt Sister and produced you. I can hardly wait.

Sounds like you have some unresolved issues about your family. Like I give a $hit about sanctimonious a$$holess' opinions

[stuartcr]

As honour is inbred in you, I can understand why you feel that face and virtue are all there is to know in life, but what about others that don't think as you? Are they all wrong just because they don't have the same inbreeding? You would die to save face, even though it would leave your family father-less? Where is the face in that? Self, indeed.