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ZOT! - An Open Letter from Donald to Saddam
The National Security Archive ^
Posted on 02/05/2004 1:36:09 PM PST by NC Yippie
Dear Saddam,
Remember when we first met on that magic night in Baghdad in 1983? You were gassing those wacky Iranians with chemical weapons and having a grand old time, but Ronnie and I just said hey, 'dictators will be dictators' - know what I mean?!! Hahaha. It's a good thing we sold you all those weapons and military equipment that you used in crushing your own people. Lord knows what might have happened if we hadn't stepped in to help you out.
What a time it was too! We sold you all kinds of fun things - anthrax, VX nerve gas, West Nile fever germs, you name it! Under Uncle Ronnie, we licensed over 70 biological exports to Iraq between 1985 and 1989, including at least 21 different batches of lethal strains of anthrax. So much fun, wow. We even sold you cool stuff like missile fabrication equipment and missile system guidance equipment. We were such pals.
In fact, it was those great military helicopters we sold you in the early eighties (against strong Democratic opposition in the Senate), that you later used to spray lethal gas on the Kurds in 1988. Hey, what's 5,000 innocent lives to crazy cats like us? So what if our friends in the Alcolac company of Baltimore illegally sold you that same mustard gas? People take things so seriously, really. You said they were asking for it, and I certainly believe you. After the gassing hit the news, those same pesky Democrats passed sweeping sanctions in an attempt to deny you access to any more US technology, but those moves were successfully blocked by me and my pals in the White House. After all, our big contractor friends love to sell you stuff.
With the help of our UK friends, we also sold you all the technology and materials you needed to develop even more nuclear, chemical and biological weapons of mass destruction. We gave you and your regime billions of dollars of credits, provided US military intelligence to your troops and pitched in with even more ammunition and vehicles. Billions of US taxpayer dollars just for you and your friends to party with my sweet! I'm sure you even used some of that money to build your palaces and maybe even that famous statue. Ronnie and I and all the fun loving Republicans just love our kooky dictator friends! Human rights are really just a nuisance as far as big business goes, right? Oh Saddam, the memories we have together will last forever.
It was tough to watch when Clinton had all those obnoxious UN inspectors poking around in Iraq, especially when they destroyed an estimated 90% of the great weapons of mass destruction toys Uncle Ronnie and Big George gave to you. What a waste! Remember in 1999 when Scott Ritter, the UN's former chief weapons inspector in Iraq, said 'the United Nations destroyed most of Iraq's weapons of mass destruction and doubts that Saddam could have rebuilt his stocks by now.' What a cad! So what if he is a Republican. It's sure a good thing that nobody believed him.
Anyway, Little George and I just want to say that we are sorry things turned out the way they did for you in the end. I'm sorry Clinton fired 23 Tomahawk missiles into Baghdad in 1993, and I'm sorry we had to do what we had to do in 2003. You know my little flower, you could have worked with us if you let our buddies in Halliburton, GE and Conoco take over your oil fields and telecommunications, but you were just so stubborn. But I still love you, you Magnum PI of the Middle East, you.
In the end dear Saddam, it was you or our big business buddies - but please remember my love, it's nothing personal. I'm sure you stashed away a few billion for a rainy day and I'm so sorry you won't get to spend it. But that's ok, because we will spend it for you. I'm also sorry about your sons, but they were really making us look foolish. You probably would have killed them yourself anyway. Yet now, alas, our love has turned cold, and I have to turn my back on you. But always remember our nights together looking out at the stars over Baghdad. You will always be my Big Bad Scud and I will always be your loving Patriot Missile.
All My Love,
Donald
TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Government; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: 10acrebutt; 5buckssezheeatsit; acnetsunami; actofdesperation; agitprop; ahole; aidandcomfort; albatross; anitbush; antiamerican; antiamericanism; antitruth; anumber15; barkingmoonbat; beatenbymice; bushhaters; clintoncatamite; clintoncronies; commie; defeatedbybutterfly; dirtyunderwear; duiq; dusruptor; erisisityou; fifthcolumnist; gethimabannedaid; humanshield; jaroftrollsouls; kneepadbrigade; liesliesandamnedlies; lovedclintonswars; lyingliar; muggedbyfleas; propaganda; pufromdu; ratchet; ratinfestation; reddiaperdoperbaby; ritterisamolestor; ritterwasblackmailed; saddamcaptured; saddamite; scottritter; smellyhippie; strikeupthebanned; takeashowerhippie; thisaccountisbanned; traitor; trollsinmyshorts; twinks4kerry; unamerican; unarmsinspector; unclejoestalin; unitednationsfailed; unlegsinspector; uselessidiot; vikingkitties; whatapantload; whoreofbabylon; willgetfooledagain; zot; zotforbrains
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-50, 51-92 next last
1
posted on
02/05/2004 1:36:10 PM PST
by
NC Yippie
To: NC Yippie
Bye Bye!!!
Allow me to get the door..
2
posted on
02/05/2004 1:37:38 PM PST
by
Dog
(Have you forgotten -- - --- -- the day when those towers fell...)
To: NC Yippie; Admin Moderator
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzot
3
posted on
02/05/2004 1:37:46 PM PST
by
Huck
(I was gonna write an opus, but we'll just have to wait and see...)
To: NC Yippie
I smell ZOTski!
4
posted on
02/05/2004 1:37:56 PM PST
by
bolobaby
To: NC Yippie
Just joined today, huh?
5
posted on
02/05/2004 1:37:59 PM PST
by
Gtown
To: NC Yippie
I guess you need a Zotox injection.
6
posted on
02/05/2004 1:37:59 PM PST
by
avg_freeper
(Gunga galunga. Gunga, gunga galunga)
To: Admin Moderator
Get the viking kitties!
7
posted on
02/05/2004 1:38:17 PM PST
by
Dog
(Have you forgotten -- - --- -- the day when those towers fell...)
To: NC Yippie
C-Ya!
8
posted on
02/05/2004 1:38:20 PM PST
by
TomServo
("Why does the most evil man in the world live in a Stuckeys?")
To: vwrcmember
Troll!!!
Call in the clans!!!!
9
posted on
02/05/2004 1:38:29 PM PST
by
cavtrooper21
(Hadj podj, I still haven't forgotten 9/11.... That goes for you 'crats out there too.)
To: Huck
I guess our new ZOT is equally upset by those photos of Madeline Albright meeting with Kim Jong Il.
To: 11th Earl of Mar; 185JHP; 4mycountry; aculeus; Admin Moderator; al baby; ...
Meow!
To: avg_freeper
A zotox in the butox
13
posted on
02/05/2004 1:51:06 PM PST
by
cyborg
To: Admin Moderator
Who is (Unknown) and why did they ping me to this thread?
14
posted on
02/05/2004 1:51:53 PM PST
by
Howlin
To: NC Yippie
15
posted on
02/05/2004 1:51:54 PM PST
by
Professional Engineer
(Spirit/Opportunity~0.002acres of sovereign US territory~All Your Mars Are Belong To USA)
To: NC Yippie; MEG33; dubyaismypresident; 4mycountry; Pan_Yans Wife; Charlie OK; E Rocc; ...
TROLL ALERT
16
posted on
02/05/2004 1:52:03 PM PST
by
Arrowhead1952
(WARNING! Every name on every tombstone in the country equals one democrat vote.)
To: NC Yippie
Nice try, rump-ranger.
Now don't let the door hit ya on the way out...
17
posted on
02/05/2004 1:52:56 PM PST
by
reagan_fanatic
(I'd rather be driving my '57 Chevy)
To: NC Yippie
And you are from the "there are no WMD's in Iraq crowd" aren't you. Why can't you people keep your story straight?
18
posted on
02/05/2004 1:53:18 PM PST
by
NeoCaveman
("Leon can't do it all himself" -- Budweiser ad)
To: Howlin
This is the second time I've been pinged by *unknown*...
19
posted on
02/05/2004 1:53:41 PM PST
by
mystery-ak
(*terrorism has been exaggerated*....Kerry....We must defeat him, our lives depend on it.)
To: NC Yippie
Think we need some of this....
20
posted on
02/05/2004 1:53:59 PM PST
by
Ragirl
("I think there has been an exaggeration")
To: NC Yippie
21
posted on
02/05/2004 1:54:19 PM PST
by
Johnny Gage
(God Bless our Firefighters, our Police, our EMS responders, and most of all, our Veterans)
To: Admin Moderator
Hey who is unknown.
22
posted on
02/05/2004 1:54:55 PM PST
by
Dog
(Have you forgotten -- - --- -- the day when those towers fell...)
To: mystery-ak; Howlin
It is someone who knows us..
23
posted on
02/05/2004 1:56:12 PM PST
by
Dog
(Have you forgotten -- - --- -- the day when those towers fell...)
To: Howlin
Unknown is the name given for a reply that is totally wiped.
In this case the mods made a duplicate ping, but wiping it didn't correct the ping itself
Our bad!
To: Howlin
Yeah - I got pinged too by (unknown)!
New database thingy? Did this troll figure out how to ping everyone?
To: NC Yippie
Typical Liberal rubbish. Rather than own up to who's financing your anti-Americanism, you promulgate works of fiction to try to smear the Bush Administration.
Sorry, Charlie. We're on to your hijinks.
26
posted on
02/05/2004 1:57:04 PM PST
by
Prime Choice
(I'm pro-choice. I just think the "choice" should be made *before* having sex.)
To: Howlin; Arthur McGowan
Apparently, some of us are on Unknown's ping list.
I wonder if Artur McGowan's been included.
27
posted on
02/05/2004 1:57:07 PM PST
by
headsonpikes
(Spirit of '76 bttt!)
To: headsonpikes; b4its2late
LOL!
28
posted on
02/05/2004 1:58:25 PM PST
by
Dog
(Have you forgotten -- - --- -- the day when those towers fell...)
To: NC Yippie
You know, I absolutely love how you lefties enjoy referring to GW as "little George". If any of you wimps ever attempted to call him that to his face, chances are good he'd break your lousy jaw.
29
posted on
02/05/2004 1:58:28 PM PST
by
Joe Brower
(The Constitution defines Conservatism.)
To: NC Yippie
TAKE THIS TROLL. ZOT!!!!
30
posted on
02/05/2004 1:59:13 PM PST
by
NRA2BFree
(http://www.angelfire.com/nm2/chainreaction/ValentinesDay.html)
To: NC Yippie
Intergalactic ZOT!!!
31
posted on
02/05/2004 1:59:37 PM PST
by
TheBigB
(I got a fever...and the only prescription...is MORE COWBELL!)
To: NC Yippie
(sniff) Is that ozone? No wonder the eco-extremists are worried about ozone holes with people like this representing their ludicrous political spectrum! So many of them the "hole" grows bigger and bigger each time an important election comes around.
32
posted on
02/05/2004 2:01:10 PM PST
by
theDentist
(Boston: So much Liberty, you can buy a Politician already owned by someone else.)
To: NC Yippie
Is that you Mark Morford?
33
posted on
02/05/2004 2:01:37 PM PST
by
demlosers
(SUV=Haliburton=Bush=Religion=Flag=VRWC=Republicans=Cheney=WMDs=Military=Oil=Black heli)
To: headsonpikes; HairOfTheDog
see 24
To: NC Yippie
Candygram for Mongo!
35
posted on
02/05/2004 2:02:21 PM PST
by
evets
(tagline malfunction)
To: NC Yippie
36
posted on
02/05/2004 2:03:24 PM PST
by
Professional Engineer
(Spirit/Opportunity~0.002acres of sovereign US territory~All Your Mars Are Belong To USA)
To: headsonpikes
He'll be mad if he's not!
Should we ping him to see?
37
posted on
02/05/2004 2:03:31 PM PST
by
Howlin
To: NC Yippie
Ass
38
posted on
02/05/2004 2:04:25 PM PST
by
Enterprise
("Do you know who I am?")
To: dubyaismypresident
My thoughts too. On one hand there are no WMDs. OTOH, they complain about all the WMDs the United States sold Iraq.
39
posted on
02/05/2004 2:06:35 PM PST
by
Enterprise
("Do you know who I am?")
To: NC Yippie
40
posted on
02/05/2004 2:07:27 PM PST
by
Ragirl
("I think there has been an exaggeration")
To: Admin Moderator
Thanks....I thought it might be a secret admirer...shucks!
41
posted on
02/05/2004 2:08:28 PM PST
by
mystery-ak
(*terrorism has been exaggerated*....Kerry....We must defeat him, our lives depend on it.)
To: Howlin
I believe my #27 did. ;^)
42
posted on
02/05/2004 2:09:00 PM PST
by
headsonpikes
(Spirit of '76 bttt!)
To: NC Yippie
ZOT!
43
posted on
02/05/2004 2:10:05 PM PST
by
SquirrelKing
(February 5, 2003 - One year since signing up on FR.)
To: NC Yippie
OH GOODIE! We're going to a ZOT!
Puttin' on my white tie
Puttin' on my spats
Gettin' out my "bye bye"
Callin' out the CATS
44
posted on
02/05/2004 2:13:07 PM PST
by
kitkat
To: NC Yippie
I thought Donald Trump was from NJ?!?!?
45
posted on
02/05/2004 2:14:13 PM PST
by
MortMan
To: NC Yippie
I can't believe you hippocrit liberals. With one side of your mouth you say that there are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, with the other you say "Donald" sold tons of mustard gas, nerve gas, etc, to use against Iran in retailiation for taking our hostages. Do you really think Iraq "used up" the weapons? We sold Iraq 6% of their weapons, while 57% came from Russia. Who is Donald anyway? Rumsfeld? Duck? Trump?
To: Enterprise; NC Yippie
"ass"
Your ability to articulate what is in my heart to say to nc yippie is truly astonishing.I salute your command of the English language.You have made a profound statement.Thank you for finding just the right word....;)
47
posted on
02/05/2004 2:21:14 PM PST
by
MEG33
(BUSH/CHENEY '04)
To: MEG33
Aw shucks. Ya embarrass me. (Do it some though - LOL)
48
posted on
02/05/2004 2:22:41 PM PST
by
Enterprise
("Do you know who I am?")
To: NRA2BFree
Very good!
49
posted on
02/05/2004 2:23:33 PM PST
by
MEG33
(BUSH/CHENEY '04)
To: Enterprise
I stand in awe of your way with word(s)!
50
posted on
02/05/2004 2:25:16 PM PST
by
MEG33
(BUSH/CHENEY '04)
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