Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Taxonomizing Theodore Rall.
Vanity ^ | El Cinco De Mayo (Mexico 1 - Francia Nada) | .cnI redruM

Posted on 05/05/2004 3:17:50 PM PDT by .cnI redruM

So what does make Ted Rall tick? How did this man come to pernisciously hate the Home of The Free and The Land of The Brave. Let's make no bones about it. Ted Rall hates America. But does he hate us with a passion?

I would answer no. He hates us with a fadish, vapid, boring consistency. He does it out a certain desperation for attention. Rall will never be really cool, like Jane Fonda or Ramsey Clark, but if he just gets off enough clever cheap shots at Bush, the crowd he seeks approval from will think he's one of the trendy people.

Rall's cartoons are never particularly deep or well-thought out. It's impossible to fill a large bucket from a shallow well. They generally parrot talking points from other far left luminaries in an obsequious, cloying fashion. Which again brings me to wonder what makes this sick puppy tick?

The answer lies somewhere on the campuses of America's leading universities, or maybe it was left on a table at Le Dome or The Three of Clubs. Ted Rall adopts his ideological pose as an effort to truly rank somewhere in the inteligensia of liberal America.

But to fit into The New Republic's version of an inteligensia, or even to rank as a Star Poster at Slate.com, you have to possess a certain, finite amount of actual intelligence. This is where the Tedster hits the horridly plastered ceiling of is own mediocrity. He's trying to be the next Loretta Lynn, with the talent of a luded-up Courtney Love. He lacks the ampage to turn many people on just based on his merits.

So what's a poor, Jacobite loser to do? He shocks the sensibilities of "dumb, middle Americans" in hopes of getting attention. He let's it all hang out, otherwise, no one would care enough to look.

Like Al Franken, he knows better than to cross intellectual or philosophical swords with his betters. So he does what he can get away with. He insults them and then runs for cover.

Rall's latest "masterpiece" certainly deserves the description of drive-by trashing. A drive-by trashing of someone who's entirely too dead to defend himself. This is the first time in decades that Pat Tillman can't beat Ted Rall like a snare drum. Rall senses this and vents his bilious spleen.

Ted Rall got what he wanted from The O'Really Factor last night. He got attention, he got face time, he got away with it and will be picked up by several more "objective" daily newspapers. He got it cheap and easy like a New Orleans pimp picking on a 17 year-old runaway.

There may not be much we can do about Ted Rall, except to realize what a pathetic man he really is. Then pity him, pity him deeply. Pity him with the utmost contempt that pity always entails.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Philosophy
KEYWORDS: antiamericans; elitism; rall
Sorry for the Vanity-Fest. There was just so much that's teed me off lately...
1 posted on 05/05/2004 3:17:51 PM PDT by .cnI redruM
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: .cnI redruM
I'd love to meet this POS on the street some day.

Oh, how I would love it.

2 posted on 05/05/2004 3:21:31 PM PDT by Bloody Sam Roberts (`,,`,,Election '04...It's going to be a bumpy ride,,`,,`)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Bloody Sam Roberts
I'm guessing you wouldn't pity him deeply until he had "met your little friend" as they said in the movie "Scarface".
3 posted on 05/05/2004 3:24:00 PM PDT by .cnI redruM (I got mines. Screw you!!" - Warren Buffet, John "Scary" Kerry)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: .cnI redruM
No apology needed.

Nice work.
4 posted on 05/05/2004 3:37:22 PM PDT by Redcoat LI ("help to drive the left one into the insanity.")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: .cnI redruM
I'm lost here! Why does the author call him a "a poor Jacobite loser"? Jacobites were followers of James II. Where's the analogy?
5 posted on 05/05/2004 4:02:52 PM PDT by Diogenes
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Diogenes
Jacabin was the actual intent.
6 posted on 05/05/2004 5:14:00 PM PDT by .cnI redruM (The words "nose candy" and the name Ted Rall belong in the same sentence.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: .cnI redruM
It's quite a good essay. Perhaps you consider starting a blog.
7 posted on 05/05/2004 8:46:56 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (Am Yisrael Chai!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: .cnI redruM
...you SHOULD consider... Stupid fingers.
8 posted on 05/05/2004 8:48:12 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (Am Yisrael Chai!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]

To: Slings and Arrows
I feel like I almost have. Two vanities in one day is streching Admin moderator tolerance...

Thank you.
9 posted on 05/05/2004 8:48:32 PM PDT by .cnI redruM (The words "nose candy" and the name Ted Rall belong in the same sentence.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson