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When One (baby) Is Enough (ultimate in cold selfishness)
nytimes ^ | July 18, 2004 | AMY RICHARDS as told to AMY BARRETT

Posted on 07/18/2004 11:39:14 AM PDT by dennisw

July 18, 2004 LIVES When One Is Enough By AMY RICHARDS as told to AMY BARRETT

I grew up in a working-class family in Pennsylvania not knowing my father. I have never missed not having him. I firmly believe that, but for much of my life I felt that what I probably would have gained was economic security and with that societal security. Growing up with a single mother, I was always buying into the myth that I was going to be seduced in the back of a pickup truck and become pregnant when I was 16. I had friends when I was in school who were helping to rear nieces and nephews, because their siblings, who were not much older, were having babies. I had friends from all over the class spectrum: I saw the nieces and nephews on the one hand and country-club memberships and station wagons on the other. I felt I was in the middle. I had this fear: What would it take for me to just slip?

Now I'm 34. My boyfriend, Peter, and I have been together three years. I'm old enough to presume that I wasn't going to have an easy time becoming pregnant. I was tired of being on the pill, because it made me moody. Before I went off it, Peter and I talked about what would happen if I became pregnant, and we both agreed that we would have the child.

I found out I was having triplets when I went to my obstetrician. The doctor had just finished telling me I was going to have a low-risk pregnancy. She turned on the sonogram machine. There was a long pause, then she said, ''Are you sure you didn't take fertility drugs?'' I said, ''I'm positive.'' Peter and I were very shocked when she said there were three. ''You know, this changes everything,'' she said. ''You'll have to see a specialist.''

My immediate response was, I cannot have triplets. I was not married; I lived in a five-story walk-up in the East Village; I worked freelance; and I would have to go on bed rest in March. I lecture at colleges, and my biggest months are March and April. I would have to give up my main income for the rest of the year. There was a part of me that was sure I could work around that. But it was a matter of, Do I want to?

I looked at Peter and asked the doctor: ''Is it possible to get rid of one of them? Or two of them?'' The obstetrician wasn't an expert in selective reduction, but she knew that with a shot of potassium chloride you could eliminate one or more.

Having felt physically fine up to this point, I got on the subway afterward, and all of a sudden, I felt ill. I didn't want to eat anything. What I was going through seemed like a very unnatural experience. On the subway, Peter asked, ''Shouldn't we consider having triplets?'' And I had this adverse reaction: ''This is why they say it's the woman's choice, because you think I could just carry triplets. That's easy for you to say, but I'd have to give up my life.'' Not only would I have to be on bed rest at 20 weeks, I wouldn't be able to fly after 15. I was already at eight weeks. When I found out about the triplets, I felt like: It's not the back of a pickup at 16, but now I'm going to have to move to Staten Island. I'll never leave my house because I'll have to care for these children. I'll have to start shopping only at Costco and buying big jars of mayonnaise. Even in my moments of thinking about having three, I don't think that deep down I was ever considering it.

The specialist called me back at 10 p.m. I had just finished watching a Boston Pops concert at Symphony Hall. As everybody burst into applause, I watched my cellphone vibrating, grabbed it and ran into the lobby. He told me that he does a detailed sonogram before doing a selective reduction to see if one fetus appears to be struggling. The procedure involves a shot of potassium chloride to the heart of the fetus. There are a lot more complications when a woman carries multiples. And so, from the doctor's perspective, it's a matter of trying to save the woman this trauma. After I talked to the specialist, I told Peter, ''That's what I'm going to do.'' He replied, ''What we're going to do.'' He respected what I was going through, but at a certain point, he felt that this was a decision we were making. I agreed.

When we saw the specialist, we found out that I was carrying identical twins and a stand alone. My doctors thought the stand alone was three days older. There was something psychologically comforting about that, since I wanted to have just one. Before the procedure, I was focused on relaxing. But Peter was staring at the sonogram screen thinking: Oh, my gosh, there are three heartbeats. I can't believe we're about to make two disappear. The doctor came in, and then Peter was asked to leave. I said, ''Can Peter stay?'' The doctor said no. I know Peter was offended by that.

Two days after the procedure, smells no longer set me off and I no longer wanted to eat nothing but sour-apple gum. I went on to have a pretty seamless pregnancy. But I had a recurring feeling that this was going to come back and haunt me. Was I going to have a stillbirth or miscarry late in my pregnancy?

I had a boy, and everything is fine. But thinking about becoming pregnant again is terrifying. Am I going to have quintuplets? I would do the same thing if I had triplets again, but if I had twins, I would probably have twins. Then again, I don't know.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Front Page News
KEYWORDS: 2heartbeats; abortion; americasdownfall; americasholocaust; amyrichards; careervsbaby; catholiclist; childmurder; choice; cultureofdeath; culturewar; feminazi; feminism; godhavemercy; godwillnotbemocked; goodvsevil; hiredassassin; holocaust; ihatemarxism; ijustcry; infanticide; madeingodsimage; marxism; mockinggod; molechsfriend; moralanarchy; murder; narcissist; postabortivewomen; prodeath; promurder; relativsim; rightvswrong; rotinhell; sacrificingchildren; secularhumanism; selectivekilling; selectivereduction; sexinthecity; spiritualbattle; triplets; wicked
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1 posted on 07/18/2004 11:39:15 AM PDT by dennisw
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To: dennisw

Murderous bitch.


2 posted on 07/18/2004 11:48:58 AM PDT by Jeff Chandler (Do Chernobyl restaurants serve Curied chicken?)
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To: dennisw

Ugh. I was on bed rest with my now 11-year old son from ~15 weeks to the end. As far as I can tell, I've suffered no permanent ill effects. My employer also managed without me without facing financial collapse. Selfish woman.


3 posted on 07/18/2004 11:51:08 AM PDT by Think free or die
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To: dennisw
but now I'm going to have to move to Staten Island. I'll never leave my house because I'll have to care for these children. I'll have to start shopping only at Costco and buying big jars of mayonnaise.

and I might even start driving an SUV and voting Republican.

4 posted on 07/18/2004 11:53:01 AM PDT by Inyokern
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To: dennisw

Did she ever decide who's fault it was? He absent dad, her mom, her friends, her cousins, her "what ever you say dear" boyfriend, the twins... I agree with her on one issue though. Don't get pregnant again. Get a tubal.


5 posted on 07/18/2004 11:53:25 AM PDT by CindyDawg
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To: dennisw

I have no idea how to reply to this. Cold-hearted, yep.


6 posted on 07/18/2004 11:54:00 AM PDT by JockoManning
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To: dennisw

I desperately wanted identical twins when I was pregnant. I can't imagine having them and getting rid of them like that. Was her Manhattan apartment really so much more important than her children? I worry about the one remaining that was born. How will she treat him if he becomes inconvenient? How will she explain what she did to his siblings?


7 posted on 07/18/2004 11:54:05 AM PDT by blueminnesota
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To: dennisw
I watched my cellphone vibrating, grabbed it and ran into the lobby.

Awfully considerate of the murderer. Not wanting to disturb her fellow patrons she answers her phone in the lobby.

8 posted on 07/18/2004 11:54:47 AM PDT by Graybeard58
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To: dennisw

Oh yeah. Helluva mother she'll be. Wonder if she'll ever tell the kid his siblings were killed in the womb. And every woman should have an abortionist.


9 posted on 07/18/2004 11:55:59 AM PDT by GVnana (Tagline? I don't need no stinkin' tagline!)
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To: Jeff Chandler
"I lecture at colleges,"

In my opinion she is too very scary person to be allowed to lecture to young people.

And her boyfriend . . . what a _____!

10 posted on 07/18/2004 11:57:02 AM PDT by BenLurkin ("A republic, if we can revive it")
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To: blueminnesota
I worry about the one remaining that was born...

He'll always know that if he were inconvenient, she would have killed him too.

11 posted on 07/18/2004 11:57:42 AM PDT by Jeff Chandler (Do Chernobyl restaurants serve Curied chicken?)
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To: dennisw

It's sad that the woman was in that fix, and she faced a difficult decision. But if she was that ill-prepared and unsuited to raise more than one child, she could have placed the other two babies up for adoption. There are a number of married couples unable to have children who want them. Was she so clueless that than termination was the only option that occured to her?


12 posted on 07/18/2004 11:58:40 AM PDT by Clintonfatigued
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To: CindyDawg
Get a tubal

Tubal, hell. She should ask her doctor for a cranial ligation.

13 posted on 07/18/2004 11:58:52 AM PDT by Jeff Chandler (Do Chernobyl restaurants serve Curied chicken?)
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To: dennisw
>>but I'd have to give up my life.'<<

Her life interrupted, the babies life snuffed out. Even trade? Apparently for her. I am sure the babies have another opinion on that.

>>Not only would I have to be on bed rest at 20 weeks, I wouldn't be able to fly after 15.<<

Darned inconvenient, won't be able to make that trip to Las Vegas.

Evil, selfish creature.
14 posted on 07/18/2004 11:59:38 AM PDT by Gunrunner2
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To: Jeff Chandler

I wasn't concerned about her


15 posted on 07/18/2004 11:59:57 AM PDT by CindyDawg
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To: dennisw

Utterly horrifying.


16 posted on 07/18/2004 12:00:07 PM PDT by RightOnTheLeftCoast (You're it)
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To: dennisw; nickcarraway

Wow! I'm stunned! She's right about one thing though. I believe she will live to regret her decision!

I find it equally repugnant that the doctor "helped" her through her "trauma". I guess they don't take that oath of "do no harm" very seriously, do they?


17 posted on 07/18/2004 12:00:50 PM PDT by Ohioan from Florida (The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.- Edmund Burke)
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To: Ohioan from Florida

I suspect the doctor was well paid for his or her fell "service".


18 posted on 07/18/2004 12:04:10 PM PDT by BenLurkin ("A republic, if we can revive it")
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To: dennisw
The NYT is so radically pro-abort that it doesn't even see how letting this get published exposes such people as the self-absorbed jerks they really are to anyone with even an ounce of compassion.

"Is it possible to get rid of one of them? Or two of them?'' GET RID OF?

But now I'm going to have to move to Staten Island. I'll never leave my house because I'll have to care for these children. I'll have to start shopping only at Costco and buying big jars of mayonnaise. OH THE HUMANITY!

The procedure involves a shot of potassium chloride to the heart of the fetus. THE FETUS? THESE ARE YOUR BABIES WE ARE TALKING ABOUT!

Note how the concept of adoption never gets mentioned. Note how it's all about her "trauma" of carrying them (yeah, I'm a guy, and I'm sure it's difficult, but we're talking murder here). Note how his or her family helping out is never mentioned. Also note how no one is wondering what God wants.

So, pro-aborts, here's your poster child. Ya like how it looks?

19 posted on 07/18/2004 12:04:33 PM PDT by litany_of_lies
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To: dennisw

God offered me the chance to be the mother to 3 children... I slaughtered 2 of them in the womb, and I feel good about that... aren't I a good little feminazi.

Cold hearted selifish murderous bitch. And that's about the kindest thing I can think to call her.


20 posted on 07/18/2004 12:04:50 PM PDT by HamiltonJay ("You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.")
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To: dennisw
Do you think Amy Richards will tell her son about how she aborted his two siblings? If she was just a LITTLE more selfish, he wouldnt be around either.

Who knows, he might someday browse old issues of the Slime, Amy will encourage him to read that trash.

21 posted on 07/18/2004 12:04:57 PM PDT by Navy Patriot
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To: dennisw

Pathological narcicissim posing as progressive enlightenment. Convenience winning out over conscience. Lifestyle trumping life.

She is the Heart and Soul of the Democrat party.


22 posted on 07/18/2004 12:04:57 PM PDT by spodefly (I can't handle the pressure to come up with interesting taglines for every post.)
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To: Clintonfatigued
she could have placed the other two babies up for adoption. There are a number of married couples unable to have children who want them. Was she so clueless that than termination was the only option that occurred to her?

Would have conflicted with her free lance career and her walk up apartment.

23 posted on 07/18/2004 12:05:45 PM PDT by dennisw (Once is Happenstance. Twice is Coincidence. The third time is Enemy action. - Ian Fleming)
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To: dennisw

I hate them.


24 posted on 07/18/2004 12:06:37 PM PDT by I-53 (How public, like a frog)
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To: spodefly

Excellent observation.


25 posted on 07/18/2004 12:06:56 PM PDT by BenLurkin ("A republic, if we can revive it")
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To: Jeff Chandler

"Murderous bitch."

Agreed. And the father is not better. And the doctor makes three. No pun intended.

I cannot believe anyone would admit this to the world. Cripes, talk about should women who have abortions be sent to prison, or executed - generally one thinks "no, they're victims too" but not in this case.

And the poor child who has her for a mother, may God help him, because she has already killed his siblings.


26 posted on 07/18/2004 12:07:02 PM PDT by jocon307
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To: dennisw
And adoption, in this case, would be wrong why?

Why do the twins have to die (no, be murdered) for the mother's irrational insecurities?

Babies don't get to pick their parents, unfortunately.

27 posted on 07/18/2004 12:07:50 PM PDT by kstewskis (BUSH-GIBSON 2004)
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To: Clintonfatigued
Was she so clueless that than termination was the only option that occured to her?

Unfortunately, my good-hearted friend, this woman didn't want to be inconvenienced by the bed rest during a pregnancy that would keep her from "having a life".

28 posted on 07/18/2004 12:07:50 PM PDT by GVnana (Tagline? I don't need no stinkin' tagline!)
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To: CindyDawg

"Did she ever decide who's fault it was?"

I think she probably blames those nieces and nephews of her long ago schoolmates.


29 posted on 07/18/2004 12:08:57 PM PDT by jocon307
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To: litany_of_lies
It's amazing that someone would want a published record of this event and decision
She's worried Staten Island when she doesn't rise to Jerry Springer level.
30 posted on 07/18/2004 12:12:31 PM PDT by CaptainK
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To: Jeff Chandler

I was thinking more along the lines of that "C" word that the University of Colorado president referred to as a "term of endearment"...


31 posted on 07/18/2004 12:12:44 PM PDT by kdmhcdcfld (Any rebroadcast of this tagline without the express written consent of FreeRepublic is prohibited.)
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To: GVgirl
Wonder if she'll ever tell the kid his siblings were killed in the womb.

Since she just wrote the whole story for all the world to see... Yes of course he'll know.

Hey kid, if you ever come across this post I just want to say, I'm sorry. We can't pick who we are born to and sometimes that just sucks.

32 posted on 07/18/2004 12:12:57 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear ( "Lady Snuggles of the Lethal Yew" Ense et aratro!)
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To: dennisw
Wow. I wonder about the NYT's purpose in running this essay. It can't possibly be to support a pro-choice stance can it?

I have a more liberal stand on abortion than many freepers: I don't like it, I think it's wrong as a method of birth control, partial birth abortion is abhorrent, but it is the law- one that I hope will be changed. I'm not, however, a single issue voter.

I don't state my beliefs to incite an argument with those who feel more strongly about this issue. I state them rather to say that even with my relatively more liberal abortion stand I find this woman's behavior incomprehensible, and indefensible on every level. This story can do nothing to support the pro-choice position. Thus again I'm puzzled as to why the NYT would run this.

As an aside. I also grew up with my mother being my only parent. "It's OK, it doesn't matter, I'm over it," was my generic response whenever someone would express sympathy over my father's death. Somewhere in my early 20's I started to admit to myself that I had in fact missed my father's presence in my life... I still do.
33 posted on 07/18/2004 12:13:11 PM PDT by not_apathetic_anymore
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To: dennisw

Words escape me....my first thought was that this could not possibly be true...tragic.


34 posted on 07/18/2004 12:14:59 PM PDT by Katya (Homo Nosce Te Ipsum)
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To: blueminnesota

I wanted twins every time I had a baby, we have three kids in their 20s now. I always wanted twins.


35 posted on 07/18/2004 12:15:17 PM PDT by buffyt (Bush Cheney Victory 2004)
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To: dennisw
Selfish pig. ...get rid of one of them? Or two of them? Just "get rid of them." Like they're garbage.
36 posted on 07/18/2004 12:17:43 PM PDT by BlessedBeGod
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To: Katya
my first thought was that this could not possibly be true

It's true. Thousands of times every day.

37 posted on 07/18/2004 12:18:11 PM PDT by Graybeard58
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To: jocon307
I cannot believe anyone would admit this to the world.

Young women used to be ashamed of an unwanted pregnancy. Many times she would be sent way to relatives to have the baby or there would be a shotgun wedding.

Now there is zero shame in announcing to the the world, via the New York Times, that you legally killed (OK, she hired an MD hit man) two of your babies and let the third one live so you could love it and raise it.

38 posted on 07/18/2004 12:18:28 PM PDT by dennisw (Once is Happenstance. Twice is Coincidence. The third time is Enemy action. - Ian Fleming)
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To: dennisw; .45MAN; AAABEST; AKA Elena; al_c; american colleen; Angelus Errare; annalex; Annie03; ...
My immediate response was, I cannot have triplets. I was not married; I lived in a five-story walk-up in the East Village; I worked freelance; and I would have to go on bed rest in March. I lecture at colleges, and my biggest months are March and April. I would have to give up my main income for the rest of the year. There was a part of me that was sure I could work around that. But it was a matter of, Do I want to?

I looked at Peter and asked the doctor: ''Is it possible to get rid of one of them? Or two of them?'' The obstetrician wasn't an expert in selective reduction, but she knew that with a shot of potassium chloride you could eliminate one or more.

Having felt physically fine up to this point, I got on the subway afterward, and all of a sudden, I felt ill. I didn't want to eat anything. What I was going through seemed like a very unnatural experience. On the subway, Peter asked, ''Shouldn't we consider having triplets?'' And I had this adverse reaction: ''This is why they say it's the woman's choice, because you think I could just carry triplets. That's easy for you to say, but I'd have to give up my life.'' Not only would I have to be on bed rest at 20 weeks, I wouldn't be able to fly after 15. I was already at eight weeks. When I found out about the triplets, I felt like: It's not the back of a pickup at 16, but now I'm going to have to move to Staten Island. I'll never leave my house because I'll have to care for these children. I'll have to start shopping only at Costco and buying big jars of mayonnaise. Even in my moments of thinking about having three, I don't think that deep down I was ever considering it.

In a sane world, this couple and the Ob/Gyn would now be in jail for murder. We obviously live in a VERY sick world.

May God have Mercy on them.

39 posted on 07/18/2004 12:20:21 PM PDT by Polycarp IV (PRO-LIFE orthodox Catholic - -without exception, without compromise, without apology. Any questions?)
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To: dennisw

selective reduction???

sons of bitches!!


40 posted on 07/18/2004 12:21:23 PM PDT by petercooper (In the end, the Democrats are really just a bunch of jackasses.)
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To: dennisw

And that guy Peter--what a Pontius Pilate. "Shouldn't we consider having triplets?" "Oh, my gosh, there are three heartbeats. I can't believe we're about to make two disappear." But legally, what could he have done to protect his children? Nothing.


41 posted on 07/18/2004 12:24:09 PM PDT by I-53 (How public, like a frog)
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To: dennisw
The Bible speaks of those who have consciences seared as with a hot iron.

Here's someone from mythology/art of which I'm reminded:


42 posted on 07/18/2004 12:24:28 PM PDT by unspun (RU working your precinct & assocs. for conservatives? | Not "Unspun with AnnaZ" but I appreciate)
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To: Polycarp IV
I looked at Peter and asked the doctor: ''Is it possible to get rid of one of them? Or two of them?'' The obstetrician wasn't an expert in selective reduction, but she knew that with a shot of potassium chloride you could eliminate one or more.

Monstrous. Imagine explaining to the child later in life how the parents eliminated the siblings.

43 posted on 07/18/2004 12:25:25 PM PDT by HowlinglyMind-BendingAbsurdity
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To: unspun

How terribly appropriate.


44 posted on 07/18/2004 12:25:36 PM PDT by Polycarp IV (PRO-LIFE orthodox Catholic - -without exception, without compromise, without apology. Any questions?)
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To: kstewskis
#27..Kinda puts a different spin on the movie Sophie's Choice....

...the movie showed a woman in anguish forced to give up one child to save the other....

...so much anguish she couldn't live with herself....

..and this .....this....sorry excuse for a woman, nonchalantly selects her twins to be killed, and considers herself lucky.

sheeesh!

45 posted on 07/18/2004 12:26:43 PM PDT by Guenevere
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To: dennisw; PistolPaknMama; basil
This is why they say it's the woman's choice, because you think I could just carry triplets. That's easy for you to say, but I'd have to give up my life.'' Not only would I have to be on bed rest at 20 weeks, I wouldn't be able to fly after 15. I was already at eight weeks. When I found out about the triplets, I felt like: It's not the back of a pickup at 16, but now I'm going to have to move to Staten Island. I'll never leave my house because I'll have to care for these children. I'll have to start shopping only at Costco and buying big jars of mayonnaise.

Well sh*t. Why does this woman even want ONE child? For all the money she probably spent being on the pill all those years, she could have had her tubes tied and avoided all this "trauma".

Idiots like her don't want to have families; they want to accessorize. She needs to go buy a funky handbag instead.

46 posted on 07/18/2004 12:27:09 PM PDT by dbwz (CAN THE BAN!)
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To: dennisw
''Is it possible to get rid of one of them? Or two of them?''

This sounds just like tapes that police officers make of someone before they arrest them for attempting to hire a hit man.

47 posted on 07/18/2004 12:30:44 PM PDT by Chesterbelloc
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To: dennisw

I think I'm going to go hug my kids and buy a large jar of mayonnaise.


48 posted on 07/18/2004 12:31:55 PM PDT by I-53 (How public, like a frog)
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To: I-53

Agree.

Hey, how about we find out where she lives and send her some! She'll never have to worry about mayonnaise again!


49 posted on 07/18/2004 12:34:12 PM PDT by Ohioan from Florida (The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.- Edmund Burke)
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To: I-53

This gal is the ultimate anti-Laura. As I recall, Laura Bush was on bed rest for quite some time to ensure a healthy birth for Barbara and Jenna.


50 posted on 07/18/2004 12:34:50 PM PDT by I-53 (How public, like a frog)
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