Posted on 07/30/2004 7:25:22 AM PDT by gopwinsin04
In a prime time address to the Democratic National Convention and millions of Americans at home, Alexandta Kerry stepped to the microphone Thursday night with a mission: Help humanize her father, a man plagued with descriptives such as 'aloof' and 'distant.'
The younger Kerry told how, when they were youngsters, her sister Vanessa has insisted on taking her pet hampster on the family vacation.
While the family was on the dock waiting for a boat to pick them up, the family's golden retriever became tangled in its leash and bumped the hampster cage, knocking it into the water.
As the cage sank beneath the waves, Alexandra continued, her father--the future Democratic nominee for president--'grabbed an oar, fished the cage from the water, hunched over the soggy hampster and began to administer CPR.'
'There were some reports of mouth to mouth, but I admit it's probably a trick of memory', Alexandra said.
He was never quite right after that, but Licorice lived.'
(Excerpt) Read more at mercurynews.com ...
Reminds me of the "cat milking" story Ben Stiller tried out on Robert DeNiro in "Meet the Parents".
Only because the author repeats this mistake, thus proving it's NOT a typo, am I compelled to say that...
It is not spelled HAMPSTER, but HAMSTER.
AS in, the smally furry animal loved by Richard Gere.
It's 'hamster.' Good job, San Jose Mercury News.
Stop, you're killing me!!!!
Hampsters is practically gerbils.
Hey Terayza, you know the fluffy toilet paper you were talking about.....uh, I was just drying out the hamster I rescued.
Where were the DNC who watched the speeches last night and what was said?? I have never heard anything so stupid in all my life. I am listening to W right now....and WOW what a leader we have!! I am so proud of this man I am busting out in pride. He was the only man after 9/ll who stepped up to the plate and DID SOMETHING. Thank God for him. Noone at that conflab in Boston mentioned the war we are in against terrorists world wide. The proud men and women, our sons and daughters are there because they love America and freedom. The DNC far left liberals are on Kerry and Michel Moore's side. All the rest of us are here with W !!!!!!!!!
ROFL!!
ROTFL!!!!
Hahahaha ....This is one of those perfect Friday threads!
Maybe this was a resident of East Hampton.
When the United States of America declares war on Hamsters, then indeed, I SHALL vote for John F. Kerry for President.
"Sir, you are no Ted Kennedy!"
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