Posted on 08/08/2004 10:32:40 PM PDT by ETERNAL WARMING
Alan Keyes, the Republican candidate for the U.S. Senate from Illinois, has his die-hard fans.
But who among them would actually bid to purchase a napkin Keyes used to blot sweat from his brow at his acceptance speech?
Only eBay knows for sure.
Immediately following the announcement by Keyes to replace Jack Ryan as the candidate to face Democrat Barack Obama in a long-shot bid for the Senate, a zealous Alan Keyes supporter daubed sweat from the candidate's brow and placed the perspiration-soaked napkin for sale on eBay.
No lie.
Here's the ad copy from eBay: "Napkin with sweat from Ambassador Alan Keyes' forehead: Blotted from Keyes' brow at Senate announcement 8-8-04
"Own a part of American history; own the napkin containing sweat from Ambassador Alan Keyes' forehead, immediately following Alan Keyes' historic announcement that he agreed to replace Jack Ryan as the Republican candidate for U.S. Senate in Illinois to take on Democrat Barak Obama.
"GOP senatorial candidate Keyes was sweating profusely after his stem-winder speech and the sweat was collected from a napkin at approximately 3:02 pm Central Time just outside the Wellington Restaurant in Arlington Heights, Illinois, under the watchful eye of multiple news reporters including multiple television cameras.
"Many at the Keyes event are calling for Lincoln-Douglas style debates between the first match up of two African-American senatorial candidates in the history of United States elections.
"Current plans are to donate proceeds from this sale to the Keyes for Senate campaign, pending a legal opinion. Due to Federal Election Campaign Laws, we might have to stop the bidding at $999.99 to avoid having to form a political fundraising committee. This sale is on behalf of an individual Alan Keyes supporter but not affiliated directly with the Keyes' campaign."
The unnamed napkin entrepreneur has even hired a publicity firm to book interviews should the media take interest.
Betcha pax outbids you for that sweat. She is already the lucky winning bidder on the hot pink bird-pen thingie.
Sigh. I feel your pain.
The scary thing is, I'll bet I know some buyers.
Being an indigent young guy with a liberal arts degree, I just don't seem to have the scratch necessary to purchase some of that fragrant Alan Keyes sweat.
Hey! That was my line.
(Bites lip. Sheds phony tear. Embraces Ron Brown's widow.)
Reminds me of a zip lock bag full of "hurricane air" from one of the devestating South Carolina storms.
I think it sold for over $100.
LOL! That reminds me of a few years ago, when I was stuck sick at home, with a high fever. When I was trying to explain to someone (on the phone) just how sick I was, as soon as I said that I was sweating more than Patrick Ewing at the free throw line, he understood!
I bet Pax wins it!!!
This reminds me of the eBay auction for a ziploc bag of air that Elvis breathed.
Where is Cal?!
I hope she returns.
It's up to $24.95 now.
Eeeeeeeew!
Ummmm, y'all go first.
its up to $105.00 unbelivable
Nope! Never had the pleasure of the seeing the green Caddy.
The story however reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where George buys a car that was once owned by Jon Voight.
Pastor Rod Parsley does this as well. Rumor has it the handkerchiefs bring many blessings.
It sold for $540! What kind of a moron has that much money to throw around for a sweaty napkin. What'll be next? His used kleenex?
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