Hey, what's so bad about polygamy? That way, I won't have to choose between Mary-Kate and Ashley.
Hey, what's so bad about bestiality? There's a horse I'm very fond of. He's tall, dark, and handsome, he has a hairy chest, he never talks back to me or leaves underwear on the floor, and he's hung like a horse. What else do I need in a husband? Oh, yes, he made seventy thousand dollars at the track last year and he doesn't mind if I spend the evening online as long as his hay net is full.
Heh. You got issues, man.