Skip to comments.Morford: Kiss My Megatruck, Dude
Posted on 09/28/2004 6:25:12 AM PDT by presidio9
Aww, screw it. I mean, really. You just gotta love this thing. You just gotta love the fact that some semitruck company somewhere called International Truck and Engine Corp. is now coming out with what they claim is the world's largest production pickup, called the CXT, all 9 feet high and 8 feet wide, a whopping 21 feet long and 14,500 pounds and 18 million excruciating earthly groans of it.
And in most states that don't give a crap for their roads or the environment or any human life that might be existing in the various passenger cars surrounding it, you don't need a commercial truck license to own or drive the CXT, a vehicle that makes the Hummer H2 look like a Honda Civic and that makes all the manly thick-necked boys go, ooohhhyeessss, and that the company itself claims, oh so tellingly, will absolutely guarantee your title of "king of the dirt pile."
See, there is this point. There is this point where it all becomes just beyond silly and absurd and surreal. There is this threshold you reach where you finally just have to toss in the moral and spiritual and intellectual and commonsensical towel and just laugh out loud and shake your head and sigh and then run off to the woods with a bottle of fine sake and the collected Coltrane. This is what you have to do. Especially when faced with such wicked absurdities as, say, Kraft Lunchables. Or John Ashcroft. Or Dr. Phil. Or the CXT.
(Excerpt) Read more at sfgate.com ...
I want one... to go with my Miata. In fact, I want a long bodied model so I can use it to carry my Miata around with me.
Cool truck. I want one.
You think that would haul my boat, then? It'd be nice to pick up firewood, too. I think I'll check this out. My old Ranger is about to give up the ghost.
Um, its probably not a good idea to let people know you drive a Miata on a Morford thread...
And Mrs Morford, you are WAY past the threshhold of being taken seriously.
Mark Morford has a crush on John Ashcroft. S/he must, s/he mentions the Atty Gen in every column.
Are you sure you want anyone to know you drive a miata?
It is a bit rediculous, but hey, if youve got the cash and you want one, go for it I guess.
"Because this ain't simply a work truck. It's also designed for the "discriminating" blue-collar redneck with $115,000 to spare,..."
It's designed for all those celebrities who can afford it.
After all, the Hummer's designer is a bona fide Hampton's guy.
Check the latest Forbes Magazine to see the "Travel Trailers" for the truly wealthy. They even have a second story, some have recording studios and of course, the marble floors in the baths.
Dear Morford isn't hanging with the elites who truly matter in his world if he isn't seeing the truth of the matter.
Prissy little gay girly-boy in a snit.
I not only want one, I want to CONSTANTLY cruise it around Morford's neighborhood. . .
Yeah, I don't want to haul anything in it. I just want to drive around and get liberals ticked off.
OK Chronicle readers, you have your marching orders.
Just wondering, guys ... he compares this to a H2 ... how does it compare to a H1?
And how hard is it to drive? Does it operate like a commercial truck, which if my memory serves has an insanely complex gear system, or has it been tamed?
The poster it, Morford, for Girly its, has it's pink laced panties in another knot.
Morford, please wear your estrogen patch and stfu.
Is it 4x4? If so sign me up.