2004 Presidential Debate Drinking Game

Slate ^ | Wednesday, Oct. 8, 2003 | June Thomas

[Califelephant]

Slate's Democratic Debate Drinking Game

Get drunk on political discourse!

By June Thomas

Posted Wednesday, Oct. 8, 2003, at 10:08 AM PT

This Thursday evening, the nine remaining candidates for the Democratic presidential nomination will meet in Phoenix for the fourth debate of the year. If these events have started to blend together, why not grab a bottle or two of your favorite tipple and bring on the blurriness by playing Slate's debate drinking game.

Cheers!

Take one drink if:

A candidate mentions an ordinary American by name

A candidate mentions Bill Clinton

A candidate mentions John Ashcroft

A candidate mentions John McCain

A candidate mentions Enron

A candidate mentions Halliburton

[Califelephant]

Is it too early in the day to create a debate drinking game thread? Well, no, actually it's not -- not if you're a Republican Party Reptile, (as defined by P. J. O'Rourke -- see below). Slate created a Democratic Debate Drinking Game last October. Words like HALLIBURTON, ENRON, and phrases like SUPPORT OUR TROOPS from Slate's list will be relevant for tonight's debate, but we should update it with our own keywords and phrases, along with detailed descriptions of favorite adult beverages we will be imbibing during the show. (As for me, it'll be a bottle or two (or three) of California's finest pale ale: Sierra Nevada.)

"What is the Republican Party Reptile? It is a creature of the eighties. It’s neoconservatism with its pants down around its ankles, the Rehnquist Supreme Court on drugs, a disco Hobbes living without shame or federally mandated safety regulations. The Republican Party Reptile supports a strong defense policy, but sees no reason to conduct it while sober. The RPR believes in minimum government interference in private affairs—unless the government brings over extra girls and some ice. In short, the RPR is the new label that our political spectrum has been crying out for—the conservative with a sense of humor and a healthy dose of depravity." - P. J. O'Rourke

[Constitution Day]

ping

[Prime Choice]

This one oughta have a "Pre-Emptive Barf Alert" on it. 'Cause based on those key terms, there's gonna be a whole lotta drinkin' goin' on.

[wrbones]

That game will require extra bottles of yer favorite beverage, and lots of shot glasses!

[Momaw Nadon]

John Kerry mentions Vietnam.

[Conspiracy Guy]

I'll need more Jack Daniels. Better hit the liqour store on the way home.

[TheBigB]

Do a shot whenever Kerry says Vietnam. :)

[Chummy]

"How many drinks if I mention I served in Vietnam? Did I mention I served in Vietnam?"

[theDentist]

For once, something funny on Slate that was meant to be funny.

[jwalburg]

Too bad the debates aren't held right before the election.

[Yaelle]

I do not like Slate's choices for drinking. Why don't we FReepers pick better ones?

I suggest:

1.) Viet Nam - 2 drinks if Nam is stretched into two syllables

2.) wrong

What are some others?

[Constitution Day]

I'd have alcohol poisoning by the time it was over.

[RipSawyer]

"Do a shot whenever Kerry says Vietnam. :)"


Tell me where to send the funeral wreath!

[LincolnLover]

Damn skippy it's not too early to start a "debate drinking thead"!

A toast from one Republican Party Reptile to another.

Here's mud in yer eye!

[Constitution Day]

Why don't we FReepers pick better ones?

Click here:
John Kerry Debate Drinking Keywords

[TheBigB]

"I'd have alcohol poisoning by the time it was over after the first round of questions."

:-)

[Ciexyz]

A drinking song in honor of John K:

"We had joy, We had fun, We had seasons in the sun,
My campaign, I did find, was just windmills in my mind.

All my life I'll have fun, I'll have mansions in the sun,
But the White House, you capeesh,
Is just effin' out of reach."

[Califelephant]

We're definitely going to hear Kerry say FAILURE or FAILED POLICIES more than once tonight.

[TheBigB]

RPR PING!

>

[Bobber58]

[sandpit]

Just got a bottle of Tres Generaciones.
Lots of salt and lime!

[Jonx6]

"In short, the RPR is the new label that our political spectrum has been crying out for..."

I thought the term "South Park Republicans" was already in use.

[RandallFlagg]

SHAKANA!!!!

Oh, we're not playing that one?

Sorry.

[BipolarBob]

i no spel so gud whin i dreenk

[Conspiracy Guy]

Tequila make me mean, so I seldom drink it.

[swheats]

What is the Republican Party Reptile

O rourke must be confused. His definition reminds me of Clinton. I don't think he was ever a republican though.

[Fierce Allegiance]

Thanks for the ping. I have to go to an open bar safety meeting tonight.

[Momaw Nadon]

[Fatalis]

Two words will beat your whole list.

Take a drink when a debater says "when I".

[Mad Dawgg]

"That game will require extra bottles of yer favorite beverage, and lots of shot glasses!"

I have two bottles of JD ready and waiting (Even though those PC Bastards in Lynchburg water it down now... don't get me started.)

I will reprsent the Reptiles well. PJ will be proud!

[Outlaw76]

I'm still trying to get over my "Lock Box" hangover from four years ago. I think I'll sit this one out.

[evets]

"Are you safer than you were four years ago?"

... hiccup...

[Califelephant]

"John Kerry reportedly flew in his private hairdresser before his "Meet the Press" interview for a total cost of $1,000. That's $1,000 for a haircut, which sounds like a lot, but have you seen the size of Kerry's head." —Jay Leno

[Notforprophet]

Take a drink every time John Kerry drones on past his allotted time for answering.

The reminds me I need to hit the liquor store on the way home.

NFP

[Beelzebubba]

What's interesting is that the Kerry blurbs are predictable (my word of choice will be "mislead"), while Bush's aren't. I predict that Bush will be ready with a clever, reserved, Presidential "there you go again"-type response to Kerry taking a position inconsistent with a past statement.

I have no idea how he will phrase it, but I'll bet Peggy is helping him come up with an appropriate zinger. (Others have sugggested "is that your final answer?", but I find it dated, snippy, and would be annoying if repeated.)

[Melas]

You'll never make it to the first commercial.

[E Rocc]

Whenever John Kerry says something dishonest*, drink a shot of screwdriver.

The winner is the one who stays coherent longest.

-Eric

[zbigreddogz]

Man! If we had been doing that since Kerry sewed up the nom, we'd all be so drunk we wouldn't even remember there was an election!

[discostu]

This could actually make the debate interesting.

[Cooter]

Take a drink when a candidate uses the word 'plan'.

[Califelephant]

Here's what we have so far:

WORDS
- Enron
- Halliburton
- Vietnam
- Wrong
- Failure
- Failed Policies
- Misled
- Plan

PHRASES
- "Are you safer than you were four years ago?"
- "When I..."

POISONS
- Sierra Nevada Pale Ale
- Tres Generaciones Tequila
- Jack Daniels

Am I forgetting anything?

[Dan from Michigan]

If Kerry mentions:
Wrong
Vietnam(or anything related to it)
allies
Question patriotism
Max Cleland
Jobs
Health Care
Hunter

[Dan from Michigan]

Whenever John Kerry says something dishonest*, drink a shot of screwdriver.

That would put me in the hospital and I'm of Irish blood.

[Serb5150]

Here's a surefire way to get good and f'ed up - take a shot anytime Kerry's tongue comes out of his mouth.

[Fudd]

If Kerry mentions "Quagmire".

[Island Girl]

The debate starts at 3PM here in Honolulu. I will have to watch the rerun later, too, when my husband comes home (ugh). I don't want to have to get my stomach pumped so I have settled on ladylike sips of white wine spritzer....

[talleyman]

John Kerry mentions Vietnam.

Was he in Vietnam?

[Living Free in NH]

...when my husband comes home (ugh).

Is he THAT bad?

[BJClinton]

Thanks for the ping B-man. Bottle of bourbon ready!

Man am I going to pay for this tomorrow...