Posted on 11/03/2004 6:14:58 AM PST by jakerobins
"lalalalala... I have my fingers in my ears, I can't hear you... lalalala"
All the conspiracy theories are enough to make Art Bell salivate.
Kerry won them before he lost them!
I'm hoping they try to stretch this out. I think it will work against them.
Did you see the post this morning where someone calculated every state except Vermont shifted to the right? There were a handful that stayed the same, but most shifted.
Good! That'll help the afternoon traffic congestion around Seattle.
If ever a group of people needed to be kicked to the proverbial curb it is the liberals. They were too smug. Too darn smug.
Oh yeah, we in the the south marry our fathers (to quote one DU'er) are dumber than stumps, don't bathe, have hound dogs in our pickups, are bigoted monsters and keep gun racks in every room in the house.
Not!
(OK, I do concede the hound dog and pickup thing, and two gun racks)
I will be very interested to see the county-by-county map this year, and to compare it to the 2000 map.
It is startling to think that this represents a huge number of Americans.
How many have committed self-immolation so far? None, as they don't really believe their own public delusions.
Wasn't there a "protest" group (instigator group) that often formed the kernel of various riots and protests-that-became-violent that was called the "Black" somthing or other?
We interupt this thread with live breaking news on the U.N intervention in Election 2004.
We have learned that the main contingent of the U.N. force are French Marines from the vaunted 21st RIMA brigade. The force had reportedly comandeered a number of city and local charter buses for their advance on Ohio. Details at this hour are sketchy and we have no offical comment from the White House but we have been told that senior administration officals are closely monitoring the situation...
... Wait, I have been just informed that there is some kind of clash between an unidentified American force and the U.N. troops and preliminary reports are that the French Marines have been routed and are surrendering in mass right outside Camden, New Jersey. We have reporters rushing to the scene as we speak but our crack team at the Pentagon is reporting that high level military sources are saying that they are not sure what has happened and that there was no known U.S. military pressence in the Damden area ...
... Okay, we are now getting reports from our people on the scene and we can now confirm that the French have surrendered and that the U.N. intervention has colapsed. We are hearing that the force responsible for the stunning and swift victory is ... what ... is that correct ... yes, we can now confirm that the French have surrendered to Boy Scout Troop 236 of Camden, New Jersey. More details as they become available.
... We want to go live to one of our ace reporters, Skip Skippers, live on the scene with one of the Den Mothers of Troop 236, Skip?
Skip: I'm live outside of Camden, New Jersey where in an unprecedented turn of events, a U.N. Force of French Marines have been routed and captured by a local group of Boy Scouts. With me is Mrs. Patty Peterson, den mother for the group and mother of 9 year old Billy Peterson, reportedly the brave lad that led his troop to victory. Mrs. Peterson, can you tell us what happened here today?
Mrs Peterson: Yes, sir. Well, it happened like this. We were about to hold an afternoon Scout meeting at the local elementary school when this l;arge group of buses started by. Well, this isn't a major street and buses like that just don't come by here so we walked over to see what was happening. As we got close we were shocked and sickened by this foul odor coming from the buses, something like a mix of B.O. and old cheese. Anyway, one of the boys said out loud; "Ewww, they stink!" and one of the bus occupants stuck his head out a window and yelled something at us and threw a cressant roll at us. Well, they boys weren't gonna take that so Billy and the other boys began calling them "stinky heads" and began making faces at the poeple in the bus. Well, they didn't take to kindly to that and they began yelling and throwing stail bread and old cheese at us. Well, I don't think and group of 8, 9, or 10 year old American boys can pass up a good old fashioned food fight so they began shooting spit wads, dirts balls, and the stash of twinkies and ding dongs we were gonna use for our mid meeting snack.
Skip: Wait, a minute, you mean the whole fight, the entire battle, was one big food fight?
Mrs. Peterson: Yes ... well, if you could call it a fight. It was pretty much over as soon as it began. After the first salvo of snack cakes the guys inside the first bus began crying and wetting themselves and begging for us to stop. The people in the other buses, seeing the "carnage" either ran or surrendered. So, it really wasn't much of a fight which really upset some of the boys, they were having a blast.
Skip: So, what has happened to the troops that surrendered?
Mrs Peterson: They're fine, we got them down in the school library waiting for someone from the Army to come and pick them up. We told them that if they behaved we'd put in a Jerry Lewis video but if they didn't we'd break out the spam from the cafateria. At the mention of the word spam, they began crying again, I mean, we didn't even have to tell them what we'd do with it, they were a bunch of whipped puppies.
Skip: There you have it, ladies and gentlemen, now back to the studio.
Special News Bulletin: Members of Democratic Underground held a Nov. 3rd "Special Picnic" this afternoon:
LOL Hindenberg!! Thats beautiful.
LOL. I can't take it! My stomach hurts from laughing!
LOL! Great pic! And wonderfully interchangeable with the MSM!
I know it's bad form to gloat over your enemies' discomfiture but . . . GLOAT, GLOAT, GLOAT, GLOAT, GLOAT ,EWWWWWW I LOVE IT, (I think I'll gloat some more) GLOAT, GLOAT, GLOAT . . . O'BABY, HEY, DUmmies, WHO'S YER DADDY NOW . . . GLOAT, GLOAT, GLOAT. (Gosh, I hope there's some DU lurkers out there)
The UN step in and intervene???? Well, as a wise man once said, we can't keep them from coming --- but, we can certainly arrange for them to leave with a serious limp!
So, President-elect Kerry. When you are engaged in casual, or business, conversation, mention President-elect Kerry. When you are online, mention President-elect Kerry. When you are imprisioned because your beliefs match reality more closely that Ed Gillespie, mention president-elect Kerry.
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