Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Iowahawk: Blue State Blues as Coastal Parents Battle Invasion of Dollywood Values
Iowahawk blog | 11/12/04 | David Burge

Posted on 11/12/2004 11:43:21 AM PST by IowaHawk

"I'm not sure where we went wrong," says Ellen McCormack, nervously fondling the recycled paper cup holding her organic Kona soy latte. "It seems like only yesterday Rain was a carefree little boy at the Montessori school, playing non-competitive musical chairs with the other children and his care facilitators."

"But now..." she pauses, staring out the window of her postmodern Palo Alto home. The words are hesitant, measured, bearing a tale of family heartbreak almost too painful for her to recount. "But now, Rain insists that I call him Bobby Ray."

Even as her voice is choked with emotion, she summons an inner courage -- a mother's courage -- and leads me down the hall to "Bobby Ray's" bedroom, for a firsthand glimpse at the psychic devastation that claimed her son.

She opens the door to a reveal a riot of George Jones CDs, reflective 'mudflap mama' stickers, empty foil packs of Red Man, and U.S. Marine recruiting posters. In the middle of the room: a makeshift table made from a utility cable spool, bearing a the remains of a gutted catfish.

"This used to be all Ikea," she says, rocking on heels between heaved sobs. "It's too late for us. Maybe it's not to late for me to warn others."

Pandora's Moon Pie Box

While poignant, Ellen McCormack's painful battle to save her son is far from isolated. Across coastal America, increasing numbers of families are discovering that their children are have been lured into "Cracker" culture -- a new, freewheeling underground youth movement that celebrates the hedonistic thrills of frog-gigging and outlaw modified sprint cars. No one knows their exact number, but sociologists say that the movement is exploding among young people in America's most fashionable zip codes.

"We first detected it a few years ago, with the emergence of the trucker hat phenomenon," says Gerard Levin, professor of abnormal sociology at the University of California. "At first we thought it was some sort of benign, ironic strain. By the time we realized the early wearers really were interested in seed corn hybrids and Peterbilts, it had already escaped containment."

Levin points to 'Patient Zero,' who in 1997 was a 23-year old graduate student in Gender Studies at San Francisco State University.

"During a cross-country trip to New York, he stopped at the Iowa 80 Truck Stop in Walcott, Iowa, and bought a John Deere gimme cap as a gag souvenir," says Levin. "Within a year, he had dropped out of graduate school, abandoned his SoMa apartment, and and was working at a drive-thru liquor store. Today he is a wealthy televangelist in Bossier City, Louisiana."

The contagion of 'Patient Zero' would prove devastating. Soon trucker hats were appearing throughout trendy coastal neighborhoods like Williamsburg and Park Slope and Portrero Hill, often accessorized with chain wallets and 'wife beater' t-shirts. A new alternative youth movement had emerged, rejecting the staid norms of establishment NPR society and embracing the 'tune-in, turn-on, chug-up' ethos of the Pabst Blue Ribbon underground. Before long, it would broadcast its siren call to an even younger generation -- one whose parents were woefully unequipped to recognize it.

Youthquake

"It was one day last spring," says Ellen McCormack. "My life partner Carol and I were in the garage, working on a giant Donald Rumsfeld papier mache head for the Bay Area March Against the War, when Rain walked by. I thought he looked kind of strange, so I stopped him and looked closely into his eyes. Then I realized the truth -- he was wearing a mullet. I was shocked, but he swore to me that it was only ironic."

"After a few months, it was clear Rain had lied to us -- that hideous Kentucky waterfall was completely earnest," she adds, choking back sobs.

Her 18-year old son would soon exhibit other signs of disturbing changes.

"I was driving past a McDonalds one day last summer, and I thought I saw Rain's bike outside. He had told me earlier that he was going to a friend's house to stuff envelopes for the Dennis Kucinich campaign. I pulled a U-turn and headed back," she recalls. "When I confronted him in the parking lot, he started giving me a lame story about how he was only there to protest globalization, but I could smell the french fries on his breath."

McCormack says that Rain's erratic behavior would also come to include excessive politeness and deference.

"Everytime I tried to talk to him it was 'yes Momma,' and 'no Momma,' when he knows damn well my name is Ellen," she says, anger rising in her voice. "It was like I didn't even know him anymore."

McCormack tried an intervention with friends from the Anti-war community, but to no avail. In October, Billy Ray packed up his Monte Carlo and left for basic training at Camp Pendleton.

"I have no son," she says in a barely audible whisper.

Across the country In toney Westchester County, New York, Jim and Sandy Vandenberg describe a similar tale of family grief.

"We are people of faith who keep the sabbath," says Sandy, a curator in the Dada collection of the Museum of Modern Art. "Even when she was a toddler,  we made sure Emily got up early every Sunday morning to read the New York Times Book Review. Sunday morning was our time, until..."

"Until those damned Jesus bastards stole my little girl," interrupts her husband, barely containing his anger. Once a Freshman honors student in Lacanian Deconstruction Theory at NYU, their daughter is now better known as Lurleen McDaniel -- reigning Princess of the Tulsa Livestock Show and Rodeo.

In Bainbridge Island, Washington, single mom Jane Michelson says she began suspecting that her son Brian was in trouble after he started hanging with a new crowd at school.

"These weren't normal kids, neighborhood kids in Che t-shirts who want to drop a couple of hits of X and chill on Radiohead," she says. "They would talk in a sort of strange code language, like 'Roll Tide!' and 'Gig 'em Ags!' and 'Piiiig Sooieeee!'"

Signs of trouble would soon multiply.

"One day I got into my Volvo and hit the stereo preset for Pacifica Radio, and then I heard this obscene 'Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy' song coming from the speakers," she recalls. "The very next week, the maid found a tin of Skoal in his Wranglers. I told him him right then -- it was either me, or his tobacco-spitting friends."

Now known as Randy Dale Cash, her estranged son is a starting linebacker for Sul Ross State University in Alpine, Texas.

Peer Pressure

Jane Michelson is not alone in her story. Throughout coastal America, school adminstrators and parents are reporting an alarming surge in 'Cracker' cliques on campus. Also known as 'Y'alls' or 'Neckies,' officials say the groups thrive by attracting outcasts and misfits from the student body.

"We try hard to engage all of our students in fun, healthy activities like Progressive Eco-Action March and Rage Against Intolerance Week," says Lawrence DiBenedetto of Patrice Lumumba Magnet School in Cambridge, Massachusetts. "Unfortunately, there are going to be those who fall through the cracks, into a life of bass fishing and stockcar racing."

It appears those cracks are widening. In one recent three-week period, fourteen high school students in Portland, Oregon were suspended for distributing pork rinds; a Burlington, Vermont high school was briefly closed for decontamination after janitors found a bible hidden in a restroom; and forty-six undergraduate coeds at Swarthmore were expelled for staging clandestine Mary Kay cosmetics parties.

"We became suspicious after several heavily made-up students arrived at Katha Pollitt lecture in a pink Cadillacs," says Swarthmore Dean of Students Geraldine Marcus.

Some say the craze threatens even the nation's most exclusive prep schools. At Exeter, Andover and St. Albans, rumors abound of secret societies where initiates are steeped in the black arts of restrictor plate cheating and satellite descramblers. Washington's elite Sidwell Friends School was nearly forced to close after scandalized parents learned that several students were openly touting Sams Club cards.

The Eclectic School Aid Hayseed Trip

To better understand what attracts young affluent students to the subculture, I spent a recent evening interviewing a group of self-described 'Neckies' from exclusive New Trier High School in Winnetka, Illinois. Like countless other Friday nights, the close-knit group had made the 80 mile ritual journey to rural Belvidere, Illinois, to cruise Steak 'N' Shake and hang out at the Mills Fleet Farm parking lot.

"Y'all, check out these new mudders," says 17-year old 'Dakota,' proudly displaying the gigantic knobbed tires under his radically lifted 4x4 Audi Allroad. "I'm fixin' to get me a winch and Tuffbox fer it next week."

Not to be outdone, friend and fellow Neckie 'Duane' sounds 'Dixie' on the novelty horn of his jacked-up BMW M3. An early graduation gift from his parents, Duane has turned the expensive German coupe into an homage to the Dukes of Hazzard's General Lee, complete with orange Stars-and-Bars paint job and spit cup on the console.

"Grandma gave me some money fer a summer study trip over ta Paris, but I thought the paint job was cooler," laughs Duane. "Hell, she thinks I'm over in the Sorbonne right now, studying Foucault and all that shit."

"I'm a-fixin' to put in a nitrous system on the General Lee, so I'ma call Grandma up and aks her for some book money," he adds.

Like most of their classmates, these North Shore Neckies were once bound for some of the top universities in America -- Yale, Duke, Stanford, Northwestern -- until they succumbed to the allure of the Downhome slacker lifestyle. Now some openly talk of dropping out, learning TIG welding, waiting tables at Waffle House or draining oil at Jiffy Lube; some even hint of enrolling at Iowa State. What drives privileged teens to such seemingly self-destructive behavior?

"I guess you might could say we're rebels," says Rachel 'Tyffanie' Stern, 17, lighting a Merit Menthol 100.  Once destined for Vassar, Stern is now living with friends after her parents kicked her out of the house for spending her bat mitzvah money on a bass boat. Last month she became the youngest Jewish female to win an event on the Bassmasters Pro Tour.

Pausing for furtive glances, several of the teens share sniffs from a bottle of Harmon Triple Heat deer scent.

"Wooo-eee, shit howdy, that's gonna bring a mess of them whitetail bucks," says 19-year old Wei-Li 'Lamar' Cheung. A former Westinghouse Science Award winner, Cheung has devoted his chemistry and biology skill to building a fledgling hunting supply business.

A first generation Asian-American, Cheung says he was drawn to the group by their acceptance of minorities. "Hell, I kept tellin' all my family and teachers I wanna play fiddle, not violin," he explains. "The 'Necks accept me the way I am."

African-American Kwame 'Joe Don' Harris agrees. "Just because I'm black, teachers were always pushing me to go to Spellman to study Langston Hughes and Thelonius Monk," says the 17 year old. "These ol' boys here never laugh at my dream to be a crew chief for the Craftsman Truck Series." 

If there is one aspiration that unites them all, it is the dream of moving to Branson, Missouri. Long famed for its laid-back attitude toward religion, country music and the military, Branson has become a Mecca for radical young Neckies seeking an escape from the stultifying conformity of their coastal hometowns.

"Shit, y'all, I heard Branson's got like four Wal Marts, and more $5.95 all-day breakfast buffets than Glencoe has Starbucks," enthuses Dakota, adding quickly that "pardon my French."

"Plus it's only a short drive up to Fort Leonard Wood," adds Tyffanie.   

Talk arises of Branson's 'Summer of Bubba,' the upcoming hedonistic hillbilly festival of music, hog calling and nightcrawler gathering expected to draw millions of Neckies from as far as Santa Monica and Ithaca -- even Europe.

"Y'all, I heard them Swedish 'Necks are hardcore," says Joe Don. "They digitally remastered all the original Jerry Clower albums."

A live-for-today attitude permeates the group's ethos, with little concern about consequences. I ask Justin 'Jim Rob' Borowski, 18, what motivates a young to abandon a promising academic career in Gender Theory and Critical History to take a wild ride in the dark world of roofing and drywall contracting.

"My daddy was sorta mad when I tolt him I was gonna skip Columbia Journalism School for a plumbing apprenticeship," he answer philosophically, popping a plug of Red Man into his lip. "I tolt him that journalism is important, but the world needs plumbers too."

"After the toilet backed up, I think he got my point."


TOPICS: Editorial; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: blue; bushcountry; iowahawk; red; teens; values; volatilemidwest
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-5051-74 next last
Cowboy up, y'all.
1 posted on 11/12/2004 11:43:21 AM PST by IowaHawk
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Ken: (at the door) One day you'll realize there's more to life than culture. There's dirt, and smoke, and good honest sweat!

Dad: Get out! Get out! Get OUT! You ... LABOURER!

http://arago4.tn.utwente.nl/stonedead/tv-series/sketches/fc-02/working-class-playwright.html


2 posted on 11/12/2004 11:45:58 AM PST by ScottFromSpokane (We're none of us prefect.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
PS - Choosy newsies choose Iowahawk
3 posted on 11/12/2004 11:47:56 AM PST by IowaHawk
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Beautiful piece of writing!


4 posted on 11/12/2004 11:48:21 AM PST by JimVT (I was born a Democrat..but then I grew up)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Oh my GOD, this is funny. And smack on target too...y'all.

}:-)4


5 posted on 11/12/2004 11:48:39 AM PST by Moose4 (I'm not white trash. I'm Caucasian recyclables.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

WooHoo BTTT


6 posted on 11/12/2004 11:51:18 AM PST by NonValueAdded ("We are in the process of allowing them to self-actualise" LtC. Rainey, Fallujah, 11/04)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk; RhoTheta

Death of the Euphorian. Must ping Soucheray on this later...


7 posted on 11/12/2004 11:51:54 AM PST by Egon (Government is a guard-dog to be fed, not a cow to be milked.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Now some openly talk of dropping out, learning TIG welding, waiting tables at Waffle House or draining oil at Jiffy Lube; some even hint of enrolling at Iowa State.



Ouch, that's gotta leave a mark!


8 posted on 11/12/2004 11:51:57 AM PST by 2 Kool 2 Be 4-Gotten
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
OMG.

That is one of the most hilariously brilliant things I've ever read. Tears in my eyes.

I'm in awe :)

9 posted on 11/12/2004 11:52:48 AM PST by Dr. Frank fan
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
AWESOME! LMAO!


10 posted on 11/12/2004 11:53:12 AM PST by cj2a (When you're pathetic, but you don't know you're pathetic, that's really pathetic.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

I'm an EssieLou in a family full of LulaBelles, EmaLees, MinnieLous, LJ's, DL's, Snookies and Skeeters, all shopping at the Swamp Fox.

This is a WELL written story!


11 posted on 11/12/2004 11:53:25 AM PST by najida (Arafat dead- One down, a whole bunch left to go.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Righteous! LOL!


12 posted on 11/12/2004 11:54:00 AM PST by headsonpikes (Spirit of '76 bttt!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Damn funny.


13 posted on 11/12/2004 11:54:12 AM PST by RonF
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

I'm dyin'


14 posted on 11/12/2004 11:57:10 AM PST by Little Pig (Is it time for "Cowboys and Muslims" yet?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

I hate to say this because it is my liberal sister-in-law's favorite expression...but "IT'S BRILLIANT".

Really, really funny!


15 posted on 11/12/2004 11:59:04 AM PST by Rabid Dog (Make a difference in your community - Join your local Free Republic Chapter!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: stainlessbanner

This is all good. BBQ is way better that foi gras any day!


16 posted on 11/12/2004 12:00:32 PM PST by Fierce Allegiance (Stay safe in the "sandbox" Greg! THANK YOU TO ALL VETERANS!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
"It was one day last spring," says Ellen McCormack. "My life partner Carol and I were in the garage, working on a giant Donald Rumsfeld papier mache head for the Bay Area March Against the War, when Rain walked by.

LOL!

17 posted on 11/12/2004 12:01:12 PM PST by SkyPilot
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Snapping Turtle

You have to read this!


18 posted on 11/12/2004 12:03:00 PM PST by Rabid Dog (Make a difference in your community - Join your local Free Republic Chapter!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
LOL! You are a genius!

I particularly liked the image of Ellen working on her papier mache giant puppet of Donald Rumsfeld. I almost spit my coke on the keyboard!

Thanks for an afternoon laugh!

19 posted on 11/12/2004 12:03:31 PM PST by Miss Marple
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Dead-on and absolutely brilliant! Ridicule is the best weapon against arrogance.


20 posted on 11/12/2004 12:04:15 PM PST by Bernard Marx (Don't make the mistake of interpreting my Civility as Servility)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
Where did we go wrong?


21 posted on 11/12/2004 12:06:36 PM PST by SkyPilot
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

pinging me


22 posted on 11/12/2004 12:07:13 PM PST by hilaryrhymeswithrich (Have you thanked a Swiftie today for the election results???)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

This is brilliant, and will now take its place beside "Peace Elusive in the Middle West." I can't stop laughing.


23 posted on 11/12/2004 12:11:18 PM PST by Kay Syrah (nice finish)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Fierce Allegiance
This is all good. BBQ is way better that foi gras any day!

Yeah, but when I used to be a line cook, I made some serious fois gras that was seared, and served on top of a duck breast. My mouth still waters, thinking about it. Of course it's always better, if you shot the duck yourself.

24 posted on 11/12/2004 12:12:18 PM PST by Seamus Mc Gillicuddy (Bush/Cheney 4 More Years Sports Fans!!!!!!!!!!! JETS/SB Champs 2005.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: SkyPilot

My gawd, I think that is my aunt Nina with her life partner Lisa.

My sick aunt decided after raising 5 great kids and 30+ years of marriage that she was a lezzy!. Marin County can do that to you, I guess!


25 posted on 11/12/2004 12:14:47 PM PST by Fierce Allegiance (Stay safe in the "sandbox" Greg! THANK YOU TO ALL VETERANS!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 21 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

GRRReat writing!


26 posted on 11/12/2004 12:16:00 PM PST by Gritty ("Once citizens are junkies for government crack, it's very hard to wean them off it-Mark Steyn)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
"We try hard to engage all of our students in fun, healthy activities like Progressive Eco-Action March and Rage Against Intolerance Week,"

That was funnier than a jun-bug in a ... ummm, on a ... ummm. It was funny ok. (sorry, I'm from a blue state)

27 posted on 11/12/2004 12:17:10 PM PST by Gumption
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

bump for brilliance...


28 posted on 11/12/2004 12:21:09 PM PST by eureka! (It will not be safe to vote Democrat for a long, long, time...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
Iowa,

I was only half way through this and enjoying it tremendously, when I realized I had to jump to the end and send you this note. You, sir, are not merely a fine writer. You are a national treasure with a keen eye for the culture and the language.

This is not merely excellent. It rises all the way to perfect writing. Strunk and White are smiling down from that Editor's Desk in the sky on your efforts this day.

Congressman Billybob

Click for latest, "A New Stoplight in Town"

29 posted on 11/12/2004 12:24:34 PM PST by Congressman Billybob (Visit: www.ArmorforCongress.com please.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Forwarded en-mass. Thanks a bunch.

"used to be all Ikea". ROFLMAO


30 posted on 11/12/2004 12:29:42 PM PST by PfromHoGro (The W knows)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Too funny. This I'm sending to my liberal, but Southern, wife.


31 posted on 11/12/2004 12:31:19 PM PST by madball
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
It's spreading.

Today, a young female law student came into my office and told me she went to a country music concert last night. She said it was great! She danced until her feet hurt. (But, she couldn't remember what country music singer it was).

She said she couldn't believe she let some of her friends talk her into going, but she couldn't wait to go again.

32 posted on 11/12/2004 12:36:30 PM PST by CFW
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
One small mistake. Marine Basic Training doesn't happen at Camp Pendleton. It's at MCRD in San Diego.

Other than that, brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

"I tolt him that journalism is important, but the world needs plumbers too."

"After the toilet backed up, I think he got my point."

Waaaay too funny.

L

33 posted on 11/12/2004 12:37:27 PM PST by Lurker (As a matter of fact I do serve Satan. But my duties are largely ceremonial.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Temple Owl
ping It appears those cracks are widening. In one recent three-week period, fourteen high school students in Portland, Oregon were suspended for distributing pork rinds; a Burlington, Vermont high school was briefly closed for decontamination after janitors found a bible hidden in a restroom; and forty-six undergraduate coeds at Swarthmore were expelled for staging clandestine Mary Kay cosmetics parties.

"We became suspicious after several heavily made-up students arrived at Katha Pollitt lecture in a pink Cadillacs," says Swarthmore Dean of Students Geraldine Marcus.

34 posted on 11/12/2004 12:38:29 PM PST by Tribune7
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Fierce Allegiance

"Life Partner" is a term that makes me laugh.


35 posted on 11/12/2004 12:39:23 PM PST by SkyPilot
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 25 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

That is absolutely hi-larious. Beautifully written satire. One thing, without trying to sound critical, is it Bobby Ray or Billy Ray? You call him each in different places.


36 posted on 11/12/2004 12:41:34 PM PST by tnlibertarian
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk; Homo_homini_lupus

Here's a work of genius for you to enjoy, Steve.


37 posted on 11/12/2004 12:42:05 PM PST by Buggman (Your failure to be informed does not make me a kook.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
McCormack tried an intervention with friends from the Anti-war community, but to no avail. In October, Billy Ray packed up his Monte Carlo and left for basic training at Camp Pendleton.

"I have no son," she says in a barely audible whisper.

Buck up, Ellen! At least he doesn't have the mullet anymore!

Bwahahahahahaha!!!

38 posted on 11/12/2004 12:42:39 PM PST by ArrogantBustard
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

BUMP


39 posted on 11/12/2004 12:46:30 PM PST by Grit (Nov. 2nd, 2004: Get out the Vote! Nov. 3rd, 2004 : Get out the Gloat!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
"They digitally remastered all the original Jerry Clower albums."

Oh.My.God that's funny.
40 posted on 11/12/2004 12:46:37 PM PST by Mike Fieschko (I'm not part of the problem. I'm a Republican.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: SkyPilot

My aunt & her "life partner" make me want to puke!


41 posted on 11/12/2004 12:47:14 PM PST by Fierce Allegiance (Stay safe in the "sandbox" Greg! THANK YOU TO ALL VETERANS!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 35 | View Replies]

To: tnlibertarian

I think you can make up your own "nom du redneck" by combining Wayne, Lee and Ray in any combination. "Wayne Lee Ray" or "Ray Wayne Lee" or such. For variety, throw in an occasional "Bobby." (Warning - This is also an all-purpose death-row inmate name builder).


42 posted on 11/12/2004 12:59:41 PM PST by Kerfuffle
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 36 | View Replies]

To: Kerfuffle
I think you can make up your own "nom du redneck" by combining Wayne, Lee and Ray in any combination

Hey, now. I am not sure I appreciate that since one of those three names is my middle name. Of course, I used to have season passes to Dollywood, so maybe you have a point.

News of the Weird used to have a section occasionally listing the criminals with 'Wayne' as the middle name. They were convinced there was a causal factor.

43 posted on 11/12/2004 1:08:54 PM PST by tnlibertarian
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 42 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk; Big Giant Head

Red State Ping! YeeHaw!


44 posted on 11/12/2004 1:54:55 PM PST by Marie Antoinette (The same thing we do every day, Pinky. We're going to TAKE OVER THE WORLD!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk
Hilarious. I put it up there with "Il Scumbaggio" in the Iowahawk Hall of Fame.

Once a Freshman honors student in Lacanian Deconstruction Theory at NYU...

I've heard you mention Lacanian Deconstruction before ("Hail to Thee...," maybe?). What the heck is it?

45 posted on 11/12/2004 2:14:20 PM PST by untenured
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

Comment #46 Removed by Moderator

To: IowaHawk

This satire in a bizarre way reminds me of the movie 'Adaptation' where Meryl Streep plays (and probably is) a middle aged, cosmopolitan, sophisticate (the dinner parties, the endless inanities, etc.) against the hillbilly character whom she eventually admires for having qualities she never dreamed of. Perhaps this movie is a symbol of what afflicts America: it harkens to the great divide between the ‘trendy' and the not-even-close ‘trendy', between the Democrats and the Republicans, between the urban and rural, between the washed and great unwashed, etc. I'm sure all this is just a caricature but the election has drawn out this kind of comparison. Toward the end of the movie, Meryl Streep's character gives up her swank, chic lifestyle and becomes the hillbilly's lover. But the twist at the very end is, she gets him to commit murder . . . so the moral of the story may be: Republicans better watchout who they jump in bed with. Mind you, this was a movie by Hollywood and the hillbilly was bound to lose!


47 posted on 11/12/2004 3:23:06 PM PST by Blind Eye Jones
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: The Shrew

Pure poetry ping...


48 posted on 11/12/2004 7:07:25 PM PST by Interesting Times (ABCNNBCBS -- yesterday's news.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

LMAO!


49 posted on 11/12/2004 7:10:44 PM PST by TADSLOS (Right Wing Infidel since 1954)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: IowaHawk

Thank you, thank you! You made me laugh and made my day. ;-D


50 posted on 11/12/2004 7:21:49 PM PST by Judith Anne (Thank you St. Jude for favors granted.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 49 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-5051-74 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson