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If You Suspect You Might Have A Drinking Problem (An Open Letter)
RobFromGa | December 11, 2004 | RobFromGa

Posted on 12/11/2004 5:37:20 AM PST by RobFromGa

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To: elfman2

God bless and keep you elfman2. May He be with you every step of the way.


61 posted on 12/11/2004 6:39:02 AM PST by PeriwinkleMinniepaws
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To: RobFromGa


The bottom is different for everybody.I thought I had hit bottom many times.Then when hit, There's a trap door!


62 posted on 12/11/2004 6:39:16 AM PST by Boazo (From the mind of BOAZO)
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To: RobFromGa

Godspeed on your journey.


63 posted on 12/11/2004 6:39:17 AM PST by P.O.E. (Thank you, Vets!)
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To: ßuddaßudd

"I admire your mental fortitude and hope to follow the same path one-day."

How about today?


64 posted on 12/11/2004 6:40:02 AM PST by Hand em their arse
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To: RobFromGa
Congratulations. I have been sober for 16 years on Thanksgiving. AA was the only way I could handle the hard times in early sobriety. Lots of good people willing to listen and lend a hand if asked. If things get tough try AA. Stick with the winners they will help. If you choose not to use AA then I hope your "whiteknuckle" days aren't so bad.

"My worst day sober was better than my best day drunk." Ray

65 posted on 12/11/2004 6:40:05 AM PST by raybbr
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To: RobFromGa

Alcoholism is the gift that keeps on giving, generation after generation, and you don't even have to be a drinker to be the recipient.

There's a wonderful book that I picked up at an Al Anon meeting in which different people describe their situations dealing with alcoholics or just having had an alcholic in their distant family and how it has affected their lives and how they've overcome.

In a nutshell, when you have an alcholic in your family, and it doesn't even have to be your immediate family, in this instance, let's say your grandfather on your father's side was a secret drinker, he kept his bottle hidden beneath the tractor seat and only drank when he was out plowing the field and your parents don't touch a drop, what happens is this:

He comes in from the fields and he's acting funny, erratic. The little boy that is your father now quickly learns how to act around his dad to keep the pressure off, he learns not to say what he thinks as his dad might blow up, he learns to keep silent, to joke around a bit, to not show his feelings, in fact, not to feel at all or at least not to know how he feels. His mother (your grandmother) reinforces this behavior as she's been dealing with this a lot longer than you have.

Your dad grows up and he thinks this kind of family relationship is normal. He finds a woman who puts up with his secretiveness, his inability to feel, she, too, probably grew up like this. They get married and have children. Nobody drinks in this new family but the gift that keeps on giving is always present. With no idea that they are not "normal" they teach their children the way they grew up, the way they deal with life, the way they they were shown relationships are supposed to be, with NO IDEA that they have been cheated and are now cheating their children.

And the "gift" just keeps on giving, from generation to generation.


66 posted on 12/11/2004 6:41:03 AM PST by Auntie Mame ("Whether you think you can or think you can't -- you are right." Henry Ford)
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To: Hand em their arse
The only line of your story that hit me a touch uneasy is the line of being totally confident you'll never drink again.

I probably should not have said it in exactly that way. I will address that more tomorrow morning. To give a short preview, I did go to about 75 AA meetings in the past year starting after I had been sober for four months. I got a lot out of that but I have some specific thoughts about the "One Day at a Time" philosophy as it pertains to me.

AA is a valuable organization, and has given me much.

The mental picture I went to my first AA meeting was that I was sober, but that I had a paper-thin coating around me to repel alcohol. I used AA and other reading to build that to 1/2" thick armor plate. I am working on hardening that plate and extending the thickness.

Thanks for your comment, it is on target. And hubris is one part of my weakness.

67 posted on 12/11/2004 6:42:13 AM PST by RobFromGa (End the Filibuster for Judicial appointments in January 05)
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To: RobFromGa

Keep it up Rob, and if things ever get tough don't ever hesitate to Freepmail me. I'd happily give you my ph. # if it helps to keep you away from the drink, ok? God Bless!


68 posted on 12/11/2004 6:45:01 AM PST by Hand em their arse
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To: RobFromGa

If you do a PING list,Please put me on it. Thanks


69 posted on 12/11/2004 6:45:12 AM PST by Boazo (From the mind of BOAZO)
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To: bad company; RobFromGa
Been sober for 14 years now.

Scratch that. 14 years since starting recovery. 11 years since my last drink. (some are sicker than others, you know)

70 posted on 12/11/2004 6:46:07 AM PST by bad company (I'm a new Grandpa.)
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To: RobFromGa
You have two items:

1) Large brass conjones for posting this, and

2) My respect and admiration.

5.56mm

71 posted on 12/11/2004 6:47:42 AM PST by M Kehoe
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To: babyface00
I encourage you to build a ping list

I will build a ping list called "Addiction Recovery". If you want to be on it, let me know. If anyone knows how to mine a thread for all the names to start a ping list let me know. That way I can put everyone who responded here on it as a start.

72 posted on 12/11/2004 6:48:29 AM PST by RobFromGa (End the Filibuster for Judicial appointments in January 05)
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To: RobFromGa
I drove many times when I had no business on the road,

My fiancé was killed by a drunk driver, herself.  She was only 26 years old. Talk about a wake-up call.  Although I am happily married a over decade later there is still a hole in my heart that will never be filled.

Thanks for posting your story, it is important.

73 posted on 12/11/2004 6:48:50 AM PST by quantim (Victory is not relative, it is absolute.)
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To: RobFromGa

Alcoholism comes from a person's genes, not from some social problem. Many can enjoy a glass or two of wine or some beer and not go beyond that. Others just can't stop. Most people have examples of this in their own families as I have in my own.


74 posted on 12/11/2004 6:50:37 AM PST by hgro
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To: RobFromGa

I'd like to be on that ping list please.


75 posted on 12/11/2004 6:50:46 AM PST by bad company (I'm a new Grandpa.)
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To: RobFromGa
Why was I able to quit this time as compared with the previous 100 attempts? This is a very good question. The only answer I have come up with as to is that this time I was really ready to quit for myself alone. I was truly 100% sick and tired of the way alcohol affected me and I wanted a different life.

That is the key. No program, no matter how expensive of faddish will work if the person doesn’t want to quit.
76 posted on 12/11/2004 6:51:00 AM PST by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: RobFromGa

Congratulations. Keep up the good work.


77 posted on 12/11/2004 6:51:15 AM PST by airborne (God bless and keep our fallen heroes.)
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To: RobFromGa

Congratulations on your sobriety to date. I wish you many more 'one day at a time's. From a fellow traveller who has been a friend of Bill W's for 23+ years.


78 posted on 12/11/2004 6:51:51 AM PST by EnnisExile
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To: RobFromGa
Good for you Rob... I know that your daughters will appreciate what you are dooing now and even more later when your still alive to see your grandchildren..

I grew up in a family where I was surrounded by alcoholics. Both my mother and father died early because of it and I can think of a few more in the immediate family that shortened their lives from it.

I came close myself but thru the grace of God I was able to over come.

I do have a drink or two now and again but I do know what it can do and I can relate to what you say.

Feel proud for what you have accolplished. We will keep you in our prayers..

79 posted on 12/11/2004 6:51:57 AM PST by .45MAN ("God bless America and George W. Bush")
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To: SirLurkedalot

I never had a drinking "problem" other than I think I too developed an allergy to it. A severe headache within a few minutes of taking a sip is not a good sign. I stopped even taking a sip about 10 years ago. I am now the "designated driver" when I am out with my friends.


80 posted on 12/11/2004 6:52:51 AM PST by Ditter
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