Man Fined For Trying To Smuggle Salami In Luggage

WFTV ^ | 12/23/04

[Ukiapah Heep]

Damn - fined for hiding the salami.

[NRA1995]

Words fail me......well, not really, but.....
BWAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA

[COUNTrecount]

[Ukiapah Heep]

Frankie and Johnny Yankovic megadittoes.

[robertpaulsen]

This guy was walking through the zoo one day. When he was in front of the gorilla cage he bent down to tie his shoe. He noticed through the corner of his eye that the gorilla had also bent down. Then when he stood back up he saw that the gorilla also stood back up. To see if it was a coincidence, he bent down to tie his other shoe and once again the gorilla bent down. He stood up and the gorilla stood up. After glancing over his shoulder to make sure that nobody else was around, the man jumped up in the air. And you guessed it, the gorilla jumped up. The man was getting a kick out of it. He started making faces at the gorilla and the gorilla would copy everything he did. Finally the man got next to the cage and pulled the lower lid of his right eye down. At this point the gorilla reached through the cage pulled the guy in, threw the guy around the cage, and generally beat the crap out of him, then threw him back out of the cage. After hearing all the commotion, the zookeeper came running over to the man.

"What on earth happened?" asked the zookeeper. "I don't know" said the man. "He seemed calm a second ago. I was jumping around and he was jumping around and he was doing every thing I was doing. Then all of sudden after I did this (pulls lower eyelid down) he got all mad and beat the hell out of me." "Well, no wonder!!!" exclaimed the zookeeper. "That," (pulls lower eyelid down) "means F... YOU in gorilla talk!" "Oh," said the man, not quite satisfied.

He left the zoo but returned an hour later with a large shopping bag. Again, after making sure that no one was watching, he started jumping around and the gorilla did the same. After a minute or two of this he grabbed the bag and pulled out two butcher knives and threw one of them into the cage. He lifted the other knife over his head at which point the gorilla grabbed his knife and also lifted it over his head. After a minute of cutting the air with his knife and watching the gorilla do likewise the man snuck a large salami out of the bag with his other hand and stuck it between his legs. With a sweeping motion he came down with the knife and whacked off the salami "WHACK!!!"

At this, the gorilla simply looked at the man and pulled down his lower eyelid.

[karenbarinka]

Luuuucy -- you got some 'splainin' to do!

[MaxMax]

I don't know how, but, somehow this is going to be Bush's fault.

[albee]

As the Security Inspector said upon spotting the contrabrand,"Mamma Mia...dat'sa some salami!".

[mountaineer]

I bought a sausage at a grocery store in Germany and hoped to bring it back, but after reading the customs rules as we approached the Philadelphia airport decided not to try sneaking it in. So I told the customs folks I had it and, of course, they seized it. I am convinced the customs inspectors had a nice little snack that day.

[Muleteam1]

>>Australia has strict quarantine laws,...<<

Australia has had for many year some of the world's strictest agricultural import rules. However, meat is simply a "no-no" for any international travel.

Muleteam1

[Charles Henrickson]

"Go ahead, do your wurst!" he told the kangaroo court.

[Muleteam1]

>I am convinced the customs inspectors had a nice little snack that day.<<

If you came into Philadelphia the guys who took your sausage, at least the ones who ended up with it, were with the USDA, Animal and Plant Health Inspection Service. In light of the very serious animal diseases going round in the world today, you can bet no inspector tasted your sausage. We used to put all that stuff into a large drain disposal but, with the spread of BSE, USDA now has to take imported meat much more seriously, especially meat from Europe.

Muleteam1

[No Surrender Monkey]

Happy Holiday Renee.

[No Surrender Monkey]

...And women and and children are going to be hardest hit.

[cyborg]

merry christmas ;-)

[expatguy]

Thank goodness you are not a "bone smuggler"

[No Surrender Monkey]

I am going to get permently banned if I post a ping to the website, but this is my favorite headline of 2004. I feel like it was a CHRISTmas present that the MSM left just for me. Anyway, Merry CHRISTmas, and Happy Chanukka. You are all good FRiends. I refrained from commenting about "hiding the salami" to the title because I know what thin ice I am on.