Skip to comments.LIBERAL AT MY DINNER TABLE (vanty)
Posted on 12/25/2004 6:54:14 PM PST by cyborg
How do I deal with a real Hillary Clinton sycophant in my house? I'm hiding in my bathroom and am so ashamed. I've avoiding talking so as not to start a fight.
Good Lord. Call 911!
Give her a cattle future.
Are you armed??
You obviously have WiFI..if you're really, truly, locked i the john..I gather you don't drink..at least not much...it IS one option..or, send them down here to Chappaqua to genuflect at the doorstep..
That's what I would do. :)
Seriously: get yer butt out there and disagree. Lay in to them good. You're a fireball and you have all your facts in a line.
If the pitcher lays a meatball on you, for goodness sake, swing away!
get a big picture of GW, or the democrat "crybabies" pic and set it as your computer wallpaper.
Make sure she sees it.
Try feigning laringytis and deafness. Of course that wont help you to avoid the periodic guffaw in response to a ponderous observation from the lib. To be honestcyborg, I think you may have pooped in your nest. I see no way out short of staying in the head. Sorry. Hope you have an otherwise Merry Christmas.
How did it get in? You didn't actually invite it, did you?
Just kidding! It's a joke! It's Christmas just serve dessert & shoo them off! Merry Christmas!
Liberals not allowed inside my door, sorry.
"I've avoiding talking so as not to start a fight"
That part is all right, but hiding isn't . . . don't let the lib win by default!
I would not want to ruin the occassion -- but I would not want to give in, either. IOW, let the liberal person ruin the occassion, if it comes to that; and you come off as the reasonable one!
Wait a min....you have a computer in the bathroom? LOL
The polite thing to do is agree with them on everything, get them drunk, and mug them.
I have to agree. I just don't go there anymore (tired me out).
We have a mix of conservatives & liberals in our family. In a light but dismissive tone, say, "Oh, it's Christmas, let's not argue about politics!"
Drink..and drink..and drink. it will get better after a bottle or two, or three,or four.
Although not many people can get a 1000% return in a year.
errrr, was that my out loud voice? LOL.
If that doesn't do it,tell her your best friends Juanita Broderick and Dick Morris are bringing the desserts....
you let a lib in your house? no pity.
Smile and try to understand that your guest has been brainwashed. If that doesn't work, I suggest accidently running her over with your car.
Let them talk, just let it fall along the wayside. But do offer ice.
Why the hell did you invite one(a liberal) to your house for dinner?!
For goodness sake--get back out there! Laugh at everything she says--big hearty guffaws when she says something really stupid. Tell her how funny she is. Fall out of your chair in a fit of laughter. Invite her back again for some more laughs tomorrow.
Two words (choice) "It's over!" or "We won!"
Well, if it is YOUR house (as you state) then you could order that clintorroid to clear from the premises, and call the police for assistance if need be, right?
A few belts of Jack and Ive never been particularly bashful (or whatever).
If she gets aggressive you punch her and call the PD.
Then, when youve sobered up and get bailed out you can think of whatever.
Thats how Ive seen it work. Otherwise just hang out in the bathroom and drink till theyre gone.
The previous may not constitute good legal advice (or even any legal advice, for that matter).
If we were to-morrow morning snowed up in the street in which we live, we should step suddenly into a much larger and much wilder world than we have ever known. And it is the whole effort of the typically modern person to escape from the street in which he lives. First he invents modern hygiene and goes to Margate. Then he invents modern culture and goes to Florence. Then he invents modern imperialism and goes to Timbuctoo. He goes to the fantastic borders of the earth. He pretends to shoot tigers. He almost rides on a camel. And in all this he is still essentially fleeing from the street in which he was born; and of this flight he is always ready with his own explanation. He says he is fleeing from his street because it is dull; he is lying. He is really fleeing from his street because it is a great deal too exciting. It is exciting because it is exacting; it is exacting because it is alive. He can visit Venice because to him the Venetians are only Venetians; the people in his own street are men. He can stare at the Chinese because for him the Chinese are a passive thing to be stared at; if he stares at the old lady in the next garden, she becomes active. He is forced to flee, in short, from the too stimulating society of his equals--of free men, perverse, personal, deliberately different from himself.
Rule one: don't talk politics.
Rule two: if they start, load both barrels and fire at point blank range. Reload and fire at will. Continue firing until you hear babbling sounds.
As a member of this forum - you have been paying attention, right?, you should be able to "slice and dice" with ease.
Great replies. Hey friend, if you are in your house get back out there and turn the garden hose loose on the shrill hag.
You have NO reason to be ashamed.
AND it is your house.
Now I am assuming that you don't have a lap-top in the potty with you....
So there MUST be an exit.
Use that. Maim people if you must
Go find some like-minded people. Go see "Lemoney Snickett"
Eat pop-corn WITH the artificial butter-like goo they put on it.
Order extra butter-goo if you think it will help.
In "Lemoney Snickett", there are people having a MUCH worse time than either you or ME.
If you are like *I* am, that always makes me feel better, to watch people having a worse time.
Some garlic and a wooden cross should do the trick.
You're hiding in your own house? WTF?
Well, since they say that a 'former liberal' is one who has been mugged, that could be the nicest thing you could do for em! ;-)
That should take care of it.
Roast for 2 hours at 350 degrees.
Serve with applesauce.
LOL..So, How is your pneumonia? "Seriesly", I hope you are not too sick! (or to cranky) *L*
Dont discuss Hillary at all. Just start the conversation nice and easy by recalling your favorite moment of election night '04 and go on from there. Merry Christmas, Girl!
Whenever the lib asks for chicken, give them ham. If they ask for ham, give them chicken.
When called on it, just say you meant to hand them the ham before you handed them the chicken, or you favor defining 'ham' as both ham and chicken.
Walk out and calmly proclaim that the first order of business of the new Congress is going to be to propose a Constitutional repeal of the 22nd Amendment so that Bush can run again and again. If Hillary was afraid to run against W with half the country against him wait 'till she sees his popularity rise over the next 2 yrs as the economy booms and Iraq becomes a democracy. Then sit back and smile as your liberal guest melts down.
Start humming "Hail to the Chief"
Ask her what SHE'LL be doing on the 20th of January?
Tell her John Kerry has syphilis.
Remind her that WE STOLE OHIO!
You get the idea...
The beer is helping. ;O)