Posted on 01/24/2005 5:15:17 PM PST by ambrose
Ted Kennedy hosting own TV talk show
By United Press International
Friday, January 21, 2005
Sen. Edward Kennedy, D-Mass., one of the best-known figures in American politics, is hosting his own community-access cable TV show.
"It's been a kick," Kennedy told the Boston Globe.
His weekly half hour show, "Capitol Perspective," which the Globe says is equal parts C-SPAN and Rosie O'Donnell and vaguely reminiscent of "Wayne's World," is seen in 158 Massachusetts communities.
(Excerpt) Read more at pittsburghlive.com ...
"What's that, Mary Jo? You can't breathe? The water's coming up over your head? Huh? I don't understand. What are you trying to say?"
Sponsored by Jameson.
He's too fat to ski and he has a noted dislike for drop tops.
And his first guest will be Osama bin . . .er, Osama Obama . . .er, . . . Obama.
Ted, the alcohol-demented "Swimmer," had to wait for the invention of HDTV to broadcast the full magnificence of his mega-buttocks in widescreen.
Actually, it's a wade angle lens.
MIDI - SURREY WITH THE FRINGE ON TOP (scroll to "From Oklahoma")
Mary Jo, come for a drive with me
With the wind in our hair we'll feel free
I have all the power of two hundred horses
We will have a fun time, you will see
Fords and Cads and Jags better scurry
'Cause I'll really be in a hurry
'Cause I'll really be in a hurry in my Oldsmobile
You are making my dingy quiver
I am hoping you will deliver
I know a nice place by a river where I'll cop a feel
It's automatic and the engine sure purrs
It has air for summer weather
And if I am naked while I fool around
My butt sometimes sticks to the leather
Mary Jo, you're cute as a model
Will you pass one more Chevas bottle
You'll see when I step on the throttle it will be surreal
It is always an adventure in my hot Oldsmobile
I've a technique I haven't varied
Let us just pretend I'm not married
Let us just pretend I'm not married in this Oldsmobile
I know sometimes I am conniving
My friend just took my test for diving
But I swear that I'm fit for driving so it's no big deal
It's automatic and the engine sure purrs
It has air for summer weather
And if I am naked while I fool around
My butt sometimes sticks to the leather
Mary Jo, you're cute as a model
Will you pass one more Chevas bottle
You'll see when I step on the throttle it will be surreal
It is always an adventure in my hot Oldsmobile
When we hit the road, if it's raining
There will be no need for complaining
My brakes I've always been maintaining in my Oldsmobile
It's well known that I hold my liquor
Most officials get drunk much quicker
There's a barf bag if I get sicker after that big meal
It's automatic and the engine sure purrs
It has air for summer weather
And if I am naked while I fool around
My butt sometimes sticks to the leather
Mary Jo, you're cute as a model
Will you pass one more Chevas bottle
You'll see when I step on the throttle it will be surreal
It is always an adventure in my hot Oldsmobile
Giving tips like never going swimming by yourself I suppose.
I've got the title: "Everybody Hates Bush".
Dammm.... I lost my pic of ol' SWAMPTHANG.... !!
"Wen I wetuned, Mary Jo and the cah were gone..."
"He Ate Gilbert Grape"
How fat is he?
So waht's it called; "Drunks-N-Divers"?
First guest is Beau Bridges.....followed by Maxine Waters.
Plus a cooking segment featuring an Upside Down Cake recipe.
Followed by a sports segment with baseball's Mike McGwire and Sammy Sooser.
Oldsmobile, It's not your father's old boat anymore!
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