Posted on 01/31/2005 1:10:06 AM PST by ajolympian2004
Good ole Italian ass-kickers, the both of 'em.
I'm so desperate for hockey as an Avalanche fan here in Colorado I had to post this story just to feel connected to hockey in some way again... ;)
Good ole Italian ass-kickers, the both of 'em.Italian-American, I should've said.
Understood.
What if their ancestors are from Sicily??? It would be Sicily-Italian-American, eh?
Actually... Sicilian-Italian-American.
I reckon so.
Yo! HT!!! git n here!
Now that's a healthy young lady.
ROLLER DERBY QUEEN by Jim Croce
Gonna tell you a story that you won't believe
But I fell in love last Friday evenin'
With a girl I saw on a bar room T.V. screen
Well I was just gettin' ready to get my hat
When she caught my eye and I put it back
And I ordered myself a couple o' more shots and beers
Chorus: The night (you know) that I fell in love with a Roller Derby Queen
(Round and round, oh round and round)
The meanest hunk o' woman
That anybody ever seen
Down in the arena
She were five foot six and two fifteen
A bleached-blonde mama
With a streak of mean
She knew how to knuckle
And she knew how to scuffle and fight
And the roller derby program said
That she were built like a 'fridgerator with a head
Her fans call her "Tuffy"
But all her buddies called her "Spike"
(Repeat Chorus)
Bridge:
Round and round, go round and round (3 times)
Well I could not help it
But to fall in love
With this heavy-duty woman
I been speakin' of
Things looked kind of bad
Until the day she skated into my life
Well she might be nasty
She might be fat
But I never met a person
Who would tell her that
She's my big blonde bomber
My heavy handed Hackensack mama
(Repeat Chorus)
(Repeat Bridge)
(Fade)
The Skates, in their final season, signed Erin Whitten as a backup goalie. She only played in one Skates road game, so I never saw her play -- but I did see the beautiful Manon Rheaume in the stands of the ancient Oakland Auditorium when her boyfriend (and future husband) Gerry St. Cyr came to the Bay with the Sacramento River Rats. I waited too long to approach her for an autograph -- she left the game before the fourth quarter.
To get my hockey fix, I've been playing a lot of EA Sports NHL 2004. I bought NHL 2005, and, to my horror, the illegitimate rodents at EA Sports got rid of the Create Player feature! Since 1996, I have been creating a player in the EA game, naming him after myself, giving him my characteristics, and played him with my San Jose Sharks. I don't know why they killed Create Player, but if isn't back next year, I won't be back either.
P.S. Read my tagline. I mean it. For God's sake, ESPN gets higher ratings for poker than they did with NHL regular season games. Arena Football is coming up now, and the NBA season is just getting interesting. I am hoping against hope that the San Jose Sharks will not fold on the verge of being a perennial contender, something Bay Area hockey fans have never had going back to the Oakland Seals of the 60's.
They can't get people used to life without hockey. They're cutting their own throats, Clint Malarchuk-style.
Hey, I just realized, I have had a brush with Bermingham, as well! He was with the Skates' South Bay rival, the San Jose Rhinos, one season. I came to watch an exhibition game between the Skates and the Rhinos, and Bermingham got a little too rough with Skates' enforcer Sasha "The Masha" Lakovic. Right in front of me against the glass, Lakovic (whose most notable NHL moment was hanging over the glass behind the bench and clocking a fan who poured a beer over the head of a Calgary Flames coach) threw Bermingham down, pounded him between the shoulder blades, and was ejected from the game.
The emasculation of men continues.............
Don't worry. As nice a story as this is, it's a stunt. Neither Lisa Leslie nor Mia Hamm nor Serena Williams nor Annika Sorenstam nor Angela Ruggiero truly believes they can compete with men in a physically demanding role on a regular basis.
The only threat there is to men in professional sports is females as goalies -- they are protected physically by the sport's rules and by nature, women are more flexible than men. Being a goalie requires quickness, but doesn't require skating speed. Women can't compete with men in other aspects of the game.
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