Political Rift Drives Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt Apart—for Good (Jen is for Bush)

Swift Report ^ | 3/25/05

[KidGlock]

March 28, 2005 Political Rift Drives Jen and Brad Apart—for Good

Jennifer Aniston has filed for divorce from Brad Pitt, ending months of speculation that the two had healed the political rift that drove them apart in January. Meanwhile, Mr. Pitt has once again been spotted in the company of liberal activist Angelina Jolie.

Jolie denies plans to run for office, citing 'skeletons in my closet'

By Russell D'Arby

HOLLYWOOD, CA—Jennifer Aniston filed for divorce from Brad Pitt on Friday, ending months of speculation that the two were on the verge of healing the political differences that pushed them apart back in January. Ms. Aniston's divorce petition, filed in California Superior Court, cited irreconcilable differences.

The news came as no surprise to friends of the couple, celebrity watchers and the a-list duo's millions—even billions—of fans. Aniston and Pitt shocked the world earlier this year when they announced that they were formally separating, ending their 4-year marriage.

A red/blue couple When news of the high-profile split hit the airwaves, the Hollywood gossip machine immediately blamed famously liberal actress Angelina Jolie for the split, noting that she and Mr. Pitt had become close during the shooting of "Mr. and Mrs. Smith." But sources close to the couple say that it was political differences that drove Mr. Pitt and Ms. Aniston apart—differences that the famously liberal Ms. Jolie only aggravated.

Tension between the stars first appeared during the 2004 presidential election, say sources, when Mr. Pitt chose to throw his "Troy"-buffed weight behind Democratic nominee John Kerry, a move that Ms. Aniston thought was disrespectful to President George W. Bush. "That was what started it all," says a source close to the actress. "She started to feel like she didn't know the man she was living with. That they couldn't even have a conversation without real differences coming out."

Counseling fails The couple reportedly entered into counseling in early February, seeking the high-profile services of Elaine O'Connell, the Washington, DC based therapist who has assisted such famously independent couples as James Carville and Mary Matalin, and Lynn Cheney and her daughter Mary.

But their effort to heal the festering political divisions failed, say friends, when the couple became embroiled in yet another dispute, this one over President Bush's plan to introduce private Social Security accounts. Ms. Aniston, who earns more than $10 million per film, is said to be a strong supporter of Mr. Bush's privatization initiative, while Mr. Pitt has cast his allegiance with such Democratic stalwarts as Senator Harry Reid and the AARP.

Says a source close to the actress: "She just really feels that people should have the freedom to invest their own money, that we don't need a nanny government making those choices for us. That was really the straw that broke the camel's back."

True love—then 9/11 Pitt, 41, and Aniston, 35, began dating in the spring of 1998 and quickly emerged as one of the most watched celebrity couples in Hollywood. They tied the knot in 2000, joined by 200 of their friends as they said "I do" in an extravagant ceremony in Malibu.

But the couple's wedded bliss hit a serious speed bump when hijackers flew commercial airliners into the World Trade Center on September 11. Mr. Pitt was reportedly opposed to military action in Afghanistan, while Ms. Pitt believed that the situation demanded a strong military response, not the police action that her new husband seemed to advocate.

A political future? Mr. Pitt has reportedly expressed interest in running for office in the near future, although sources close to the star of "Ocean's Twelve," "Fight Club," and "Seven Years in Tibet" say that he hasn't yet determined whether he will confine his political ambitions to the state level, or enter into the national political fray.

Ms. Jolie, Mr. Pitt's costar and reported romantic interest, doused reports that she plans to run for office over the weekend, telling reporters that "I think I've got too many skeletons in my closet for politics."

[Ciexyz]

Brad, you're no Arnie Schwarzenegger. Better stay out of politics, bloke.

[Maria S]

You are RIGHT! Below is ANOTHER story from this website...and I don't think there's much truth in it either!!




March 25, 2005
Christian 'Conception' Parties Raise Ire, Eyebrows
Thousands of Christian couples plan to celebrate the occasion of their savior's creation by attending 'conception parties' tonight, intimate gatherings where the conception of the world's most famous baby is lovingly reenacted. Fans of the pro-life parties say that theirs is a way of livening up the culture of life. But some Christians say that they're uncomfortable celebrating the pregnancy of a teenage girl, even if the father was a heavenly one.

[Lancey Howard]

Hilarious!
This is a little more subtle than 'The Onion' or 'Scrappleface', so a big, bold "SATIRE" in the thread title would.... ah, nevermind! That's no fun.

[metesky]

Ms. Jolie, Mr. Pitt's costar and reported romantic interest, doused reports that she plans to run for office over the weekend, telling reporters that "I think I've got too many skeletons in my closet for politics."

Satire or not, that's just bad writing. I mean who even knew they were having elections over the weekend?

[Rummyfan]

Extremely well-written satire here.

[dfwgator]

I knew this could not be true, because Aniston said nasty things about President Bush before she even married Brad.

[Churchillspirit]

Ms Jolie does have some redeeming qualities. She gave $1million to the tsunami relief effort and I admire how she is raising her children. Gifts are not material things but travel. Perhaps enough travel will broaden her mind and convert her to the right side in politics.

[DoctorMichael]

Aniston ripped President Bush a new one in her ROLLING STONE interview that came hit the stands just before 911. Bush was one of the stupidist human beings on the planet according to her.

Aniston is a spolied Hollywood Lib.

[cubreporter]

A joke.

[E. Pluribus Unum]

Me too.

[beckett]

My BS detector has gone off the charts with this one. What is the "Swift Report?"

Aniston gave a furiously anti-Bush interview to Rolling Stone some years back and is bosom buddies with her famously leftwing co-star from Friends who is married to that Arquette guy, the Arquettes having an impeccable far left/communist pedigree in Hollywood dating back to the 30s.

More sources on this one are absolutely necessary before any halfway sane person believes a word of it.

[MotleyGirl70]

I'll give this satire a 7.

Mr. Pitt

When I see "Mr. Pitt", I think of the "real" Mr. Pitt :)

"I was hoping for my new socks today."

[Hildy]

This has to be a joke. Even the way it's written is dumb.

[Hildy]

Give me the backstory about the Arquettes. I know the Grandpa was Cliff (Charlie Weaver) Arquette. But what else is there? There sure are alot of them out there!

[cubreporter]

No comparison! Mr. Pitt of the sock world is a Real believeable actor!!!!

[Ghost of Philip Marlowe]

"Jolie denies plans to run for office, citing 'skeletons in my closet'"

If she were honest, that quote would read:
"Jolie denies plans to run for office, citing 'cobwebs in my skull'

[Ghost of Philip Marlowe]

For all those who can't write satire:

MOCKERY or HUMOR must be evident.

This article has no satirical or humorous elements whatsoever.

[rdcorso]

Only the real leftist nut jobs and America haters were against taking military action against Afghanistan.Pitts must be a Michael Moore democrat.

[beckett]

I read somewhere a few years back that Cliff Arquette, in contrast to the rube from Mt Idy he portrayed as Charlie Weaver, was a radical leftist and a proponent of free love in the 30s. A quick google search didn't produce any documentation of the claim, but anyway that's what I remember reading.

[annajones]

See

celiberal.com (lists of liberals)
Aniston is a know vocal liberal. Both Brad and
Angelina are not on the list.

However it's been known that Brad was out there helping out John Kerry's campaign and this is Kerry left of (Ted)Kennedy--not good. However before we jump on saying Angelina made Brad do it, look who else Brad is friends with like err George Clooney.