Posted on 04/07/2005 9:31:30 PM PDT by Beowulf9
Loch Ness Monster Finally Identified
Forensic Artist and private investigator William McDonald, finally identifies what Loch Ness Monster may be.
(PRWEB) April 7, 2005 -- After nearly 1,500 years of conjecture, it appears the Loch Ness Monster may finally be identified. According to American Forensic Artist and private investigator William McDonald, the famous lake monster known as “Nessie” is neither a plesiosaur or prehistoric reptile, but a real, predatory species of water animal possessing the ability to hunt on land.
In the winter months of 2004, McDonald photographed tracks left by a large animal on a mud-covered Loch Ness shoreline in an area south of Invermoriston, just off the A-82 highway. Movie footage may be viewed at http://loch-movie.tripod.com. Weeks later, McDonald was contacted by two American university students who had just returned from a Spring Break trip to Britain. The students provided McDonald with video tape footage of the remains of a 200-pound Highland red deer carcass, found in a boat-only accessible area known to local fishermen as a “Kill Zone.” The deer appears to have been torn in half, its pelt ravaged. (there are no bears in the Scottish Highlands). But the most shocking find was a shed animal tooth – found wedged between the deer’s exposed ribcage. The tooth is barbed, well-rooted, and measured nearly four inches in length!
According to the three eyewitnesses on the video, shortly after the find, the tooth and several video tapes were confiscated by a local water bailiff. Highland authorities were uncooperative in the students’ efforts to have their find returned. The salvaged footage and photos of the tooth have been posted at http://www.lochnesstooth.com, along with a $5,000 reward for any information leading to the return of the “Nessie” tooth.
Mr. McDonald is coordinating the students’ efforts to have the tooth returned. He can be reached at Argonaut-Grey Wolf Productions in Mesa, AZ. PHONE: 480-330-7553.
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This is what the other site says, along with pictures of the 'tooth'.
"I’m a college student in the Midwest U.S. In March (2005) my roommate and I went to the U.K and spent our last two days at Loch Ness. The boat rental season hadn’t started so we hired a local who took us on a private boat tour.
After a few hours we came across the remains of a dead deer. The animal had literally been ripped in half - hind quarters gone, its spine was broken and severed. There were huge bloody gashes, teeth marks and a bizarre bony protrusion sticking out of an exposed rib. Using a screwdriver, we cracked open the ribcage and pried it loose. It was a tooth - about 4 inches long, barbed and very sharp!
I'm about the biggest skeptic you'll ever meet, but this tooth was real, and whatever ate that deer had to have been huge. Our Scottish local told us there are no bears in the area. Excited, we signaled a passing boat to join us. Big mistake! The man told us he was the water bailiff, flashed credentials, then confiscated the tooth and the video tape that was in my camera, claiming we could get everything back from the Highland Authorities as long as we cooperated. Fortunately, he didn’t find the earlier footage in my backpack.
We wasted our last day trying to get the tooth back. Most thought we were nuts, one guy who knew the water bailiff threatened to "take our passports if we made trouble." Now we're angry and want the tooth back. I tracked down a Loch Ness expert through some blogs who discovered fresh animal tracks last December. (http://loch-movie.tripod.com) Mr. McDonald says the tooth will prove his own theories apparently - developed for some author. He swears he knows what the creature is and has investors ready to buy the tooth from us.
Please look at our footage. Send the links to everyone you know. Anyone whose effort help us to recover the tooth from the Highland authorities will receive a $5,000 reward! You can contact me by clicking here or contact Bill McDonald at bill_kia@hotmail.com"
I went to college in Aberdeen, Scotland. Every spring there is a Nessie sighting or controversy to get people to Inverness. There is NO other reason to go there.
That picture is part of a crab claw,
Are you sure that didn't come from an Orc?
Is Kirstie Alley swimming again?
Don't look much like a toof do it?
Bit late for April Fools Day???
Just an uninformed engineer's opinion.
That looks more like an antler than a tooth.
Notice the cruve of the tooth, not look at the root; it doesn't look structurally sound. So consider, we have a predatory mammal that has never been sighted, with a tooth 4 inches long, that isn't structrually sound nor does it have signs of wear (notice the tip). Sorry, my BS detector is going off.
How long has Nessie been around? Shouldn't it be dead by now?
> That picture is part of a crab claw, ...
Looks more like a pronghorn antler to me,
but in any event, not a tooth.
Someone is gaming someone here.
That's what I thought.
Sort of like a Pronghorn.
Could be a small antler of a deer(?). Wait a minute, wasn`t that take from a dead deer?
Celtic Ping list!
My funness about the Loch Ness... Monster :)
The thing is obvious. It's a dragon.
It looks like some kind of little horn to me. I can readily imagine that a deer might have been killed by another deer and that local dogs and foxes might have devoured parts of the corpse. People in general, particularly students, are so unused to the rather shocking sight of "nature red in a tooth and claw" that they can't see a dead animal in an objective way.
I think a wyvern...
Your antler guess is probably correct.
Or has crabs...
Well, there could be more than one.
There is definitely something there, and the evidence against Nessie is very weak.
However, that is no tooth.
Loch Ness Monster Finally Identified
"The Loch Ness monster is a...crab"?
LOL!
Inverness Crab?
Thanks for posting the picture. These comments are cracking me up. I needed a good diversion from the illegal alien thing, (too fwustwating).
Seriously, I'm with you. It looks like a claw, with the "teeth" mostly sanded off. The way it spreads out toward the base, tapers at the tip, is not very toothlike, but the base spread is what it should be near a joint and the tip is hooked like a crab claw. And the color at the tip, that's a claw thing, not a tooth thing.
As hoaxes go, there are better.
Notice the cruve of the tooth, not look at the root; it doesn't look structurally sound. So consider, we have a predatory mammal that has never been sighted, with a tooth 4 inches long, that isn't structrually sound nor does it have signs of wear (notice the tip). Sorry, my BS detector is going off.
Also, to me, it goes against logic that a tooth would have a barb on it. A barb would only make it difficult for the animal to consume what it just killed or bit into.
Naw, looks more like a griffin's claw...
I kind of liked Inverness... some parts of it are rather pretty to walk around, especially the islands in the Ness.
I went to college in St. Andrews - now there's a place that's not worth visiting. Feh.
LOL!
Just freakin great, the damn thing can walk now too!
Therizinosaurus
perhaps? (note the claws)Apparently, Mary (Queen Of Scots) saw "Nessie"
while being held captive in Castle Urquhart. My
mom read the book that's from (she doesn't remember
what one, it's been a while) & Mary wrote about
a large fish monster in her journal. Of course, she's
not the only opne in History to have seen it.
I particularly like the part where the blur out the faces of the "eye-witlesses"...
That gives me an idea. They're pretty gullible South of the border -- "Cupacabras" is believed by millions, and rumors spread like wildfire. Well, let's start a rumor about some large freaky beast that migrates (by air) from the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of California and whose route takes it approximately across the full length of the U.S.-Mexico border. It does its flying only at night in remote areas, and that's why there are no pictures of it. (In the day it rests, and camouflages perfectly into the landscape). When it hunts, it swoops down and picks off animals up to 250 lbs, leaving no trace of them.
If this rumor successfully spread it would be more effective than a full deployment of the National Guard.
Not only does the "tooth" look bogus (where is the root? what kind of enamel is black? what about that hook on the so-called tooth?)... but take a look at the FINGERS on the hand of the guy holding the tooth. He or she has the shortest fingers I've ever seen in my life. As much as I'd like to believe that there is something crawling around Scotland with four-inch teeth living in Loch Ness, this screams phony. Or at least one of those cheesy movies on the Sci Fi Channel.
Apart from the BS factor, I was thinking of the "tourism factor" as a motive.
Historically speaking, I have some ancient bloodlines going back a "few years" beyond the last "few years" (understatement, read extended generations) in the U.S. and there was never any rumor of anything amiss from the Old land, that I can recall from any fragmented information passed down. ...I saw Edinburgh, other areas... blue sky, fog and rain. They fly balloons in Edinburgh, by the green hills... When the fog and rain set in to the areas well North, that's a sight to behold....
'Been there once, and will probably never return due to the anti-family, anti-gun "liberal infestation" they have of late, without a Major Change in political and military leadership.
Sad. Scotland did have an excellent, fierce and free and noble heritage at one point. The nation once had ravenous wolves capable of exterminating Roman military units with extreme prejudice. What is lurking is not any Loch Ness Monster.
To think that the proverbial beast may yet walk ashore is still an interesting concept, if only for imaginative -- and tourist dollar -- purposes? The beast from a Scottish Loch walking the earth, now that's an idea.
The Police c/o Sting, Sychronicity II
Source: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/s/sting-&-police/132331.html
Another suburban family morning
Grandmother screaming at the wall
We have to shout above the din of our rice crispies
We can’t hear anything at all
Mother chants her litany of boredom and frustration
But we know all her suicides are fake
Daddy only stares into the distance
There’s only so much more that he can take
Many miles away
Something crawls from the slime
At the bottom of a dark Scottish lake
Another industrial ugly morning
The factory belches filth into the sky
He walks unhindered through the picket lines today
He doesn’t think to wonder why
The secretaries pout and preen like
Cheap tarts in a red light street
But all he ever thinks to do is watch
And every single meeting with his so-called superior
Is a humiliating kick in the crotch
Many miles away
Something crawls to the surface
Of a dark Scottish lake
Another working day has ended
Only the rush hour hell to face
Packed like lemmings into shiny metal boxes
Contestants in a suicidal race
Daddy grips the wheel and stares alone into the distance
He knows that something somewhere has to break
He sees the family home now looming in the headlights
The pain upstairs that makes his eyeballs ache
Many miles away
There’s a shadow on the door
Of a cottage on the shore
Of a dark Scottish lake
Many miles away, many miles away
Little Horn
The Loch Ness Monster is a communist conspiracy!
Good Psyop idea. Air-drop the pamphlets....
It's time to get inside their heads and do some "work" ..
I hear the naughtie monkeys ar'e sellin' a bridg ov'r the Englysh Chann'll. Wanna' buy it?
FYI, there's a loo nearbyie, you can paye' a poun'd to wlk-in n'go an see the-Egress!
C'mon, ya' juust' knoow ya want ta' see th' egress laddy! Jist pay' the pound' an' gooh see-it, eh? Thay'rs a suck'r borne ev'ry minutt!
Sounds like Hillary came out to feed.
Nope, no tourism motive, no way. Nope. No benefit to be had there. Sorry. There is NO tourist $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ involved, nope.
NOTE: tourist brochures, pamphlets, taxis, guided tours, rentals, food and lodging available upon request!
For just 70-P, you can have your own kit!
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