Wanna write a limerick~Freeper Canteen~19 Jan 2006

The Canteen poets

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Serving the best military in the world,welcome to the Coffee Klatch~ ~Wanna write a limerick? Welcome to the Coffee Klatch, the cyber coffee bar at your local Canteen. We always offer Service with a smile, pro-american reading material and witty conversations. If you love the troops, our veterans and our allies, you are with family here..so jump right in and perhaps before you go you will be writing a limerick! So gather round the fire and read along with us some quaint little poems from the Book of Nonsense: *** A limerick is a form of poetry that contains five lines and has an aabba rhyming pattern. They are usually nonsensical or humorous, and in spite of their reputation for sometimes being racy or bawdy, their easy-to-write form makes them fun for group use. 19th century, English writer and illustrator, Edward Lear, was famous for his fanciful limericks: There was an old man with a beard, Who said, "It is just as I feared! Two owls and a hen Four larks and a wren Have all built their nests in my beard." *** There was an Old Man in a boat, Who said, 'I'm afloat, I'm afloat!' When they said, 'No! you ain't!' He was ready to faint, That unhappy Old Man in a boat. There was an Old Man of Columbia, Who was thirsty, and called out for some beer; But they brought it quite hot, In a small copper pot, Which disgusted that man of Columbia. *** Limerick Lab (writing aid) Complete book of nonsense Limericks *** So, thanks for stopping by to say hello to the troops~ Please try your hand at writing a limerick and hey-dont forget my tip! (Don't be stingy) Here is mine, (being as corny as I wanna be!): American troops are so cool, They pack up and ship out the fools, They get the job done, From moonlight to sun, and they give the rest of us peace. (I tweaked the format a *bit*..because that is what kind of girl I am..hehe!) Thank you Troops, veterans and allies! Our world would be dark without you! You guys and gals are very cool cats! Hugs. Y~all do your thang! Limerick writers of Freeperville unite! Show the troops some love! ;]

[Diva Betsy Ross]

[Soaring Feather]

Good Morning Troops!
Thank You, for your service
Thank You, for my freedom.

Canteen Mission Statement: Showing support and boosting the morale of our military and our allies military and the family members of the above. Honoring those who have served before.

[dagoofyfoot]

Hey, I know one!


There once was a man from Nantucket.


Who's....


Oh man, I'd better not.

[Fast Moving Angel]

Lessee ... There once was a man from Nantucket ...

No, wait, that line's been taken ;-)

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

Click on the pic and I'll guide you
to the start of today's thread




FR CANTEEN MISSION STATEMENT
Showing support and boosting the morale of
our military and our allies military
and the family members of the above.
Honoring those who have served before.
CLICK HERE TO FIND LATEST THREAD.




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[Diva Betsy Ross]

Ping!

I Want To Fly Like An Eagle-Steve Miller Band (here)

Please let me know if you would like to be removed from or added to my Favorite Freepers Ping list...(by freepmail! Don't tell the whole world- hehe!)

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Here there! Welcome to the Canteen... lets (you and me) count how many times that one comes up... (*snicker*).

[MEG33]

Can't write..but here's a good one by Ogden Nash:

A flea and a fly in a flue
Were imprisoned, so what could they do?
Said the fly, "let us flee!"
"Let us fly!" said the flea.
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

Diva Betsy Ross

Roses are Red
Violets are Blue

The Canteen wants to Thank You!

[Arm_Bears]

There once was a plumber named Lee...

[writer33]

Good job, mother.

:)

[writer33]

Nice thread, DBR.

Here it is:

There once was a man from Nantucket....

:) HA!

[tje]

There once was a man from Peru
Whose limericks ended at line two.

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

FYI : Look in upper right corner of "My Comments" page.
Set it for "Brief" instead of Full.
You only will get title of thread and who pinged you.
No graphics will load.

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

From the men in the Military and the Canteen

[MEG33]

Thank you, son.

;)

[MikefromOhio]

Make the world a better place....
Punch a Steeler fan in the face :)

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Were Not going to Take it Anymore-Twisted Sister(here)

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

To every service man or woman reading this thread.
Thank You for your service to our country.
No matter where you are stationed,
No matter what your job description
Know that we are are proud of each and everyone of you.

To our military readers, we remain steadfast in keeping the Canteen doors open.
The FR Canteen is Free Republics longest running daily thread specifically designed
to provide entertainment and morale support for the military.
The doors have been open since Oct 7 2001,
the day of the start of the war in Afghanistan.
We are indebted to you for your sacrifices for our Freedom.

FR CANTEEN MISSION STATEMENT
Showing support and boosting the morale of
our military and our allies military
and the family members of the above.
Honoring those who have served before.
CLICK HERE TO FIND LATEST THREAD.

[Horatio Gates]

There once was a prez named Bill
He still thinks he has a legacy to fufill
He made the military a mess
Left a stain on a dress
And the sum of his presidency was nil

[mylife]

Welcome to the freeper Canteen
We support our troops seen and unseen
No Left wingnut ravers admitted
We think they should be committed
Particularly the likes of Howard Dean

[HiJinx]

There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose daughter ran off with a bucket
She met with a sailor
Who soundly regaled 'er
And as for the bucket, Paw tuck it.

[Pharmboy]

A pansy who lived in Khartoum
Took a lesbian up to his room;
And they argued all night
Over who had the right
To do what of which and to whom

[AnAmericanMother]

One of the few clean limericks I know:

There was a young man from Japan
Whose verses nobody could scan.
When they asked him why,
He made this reply:
"I always try to get as many syllables into the last line as I absolutely possibly can."

The reason there are so few clean limericks:

The limerick's furtive and mean;
You must keep her in close quarantine,
Or she slips to the slums,
Where she quickly becomes
Disorderly, drunk, and obscene.

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Tom Petty- I Wont Back Down (here)

[AnAmericanMother]

. . . but wait, there's more:

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who kept all his cash in a bucket.
His daughter, named Nan,
Ran away with a man,
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.

The pair of them went to Manhasset,
(Nan holding the cash as an asset.)
Pa followed them there,
But they left in a tear,
And as for the asset, Manhasset.

Pa followed the pair to Pawtucket,
(Nan and the man with the bucket.)
Pa said to the man,
"You're welcome to Nan."
But as for the bucket, Pawtucket.

[Cincinnatus]

The Bin Laden Verses

There once was a man named Osama
Who spent too much time with his mama.
You won't see him strut
With that cruise up his butt
From our dear old B-52 bomb-a.

***********

There once was a group: Taliban.
Of Bin Laden, each one was a fan.
Here's a product for you:
Sun block 242.
Go prepare for your nuclear tan.

*************

A terrorist chap named Bin Laden
Wore robes of the best Egypt cotton.
The towers that fell
Should remind him of hell
Where he'll soon be for being so rotten.

*************

Dear Allah, I write from my cave.
It's Osama the daring and brave.
I have done all you ask.
I've completed each task.
Won't you come now and rescue your slave?

Osama! It's Allah, you schmuck!
I'm afraid you have run out of luck.
Now stand up tall and proud
And look up at that cloud,
And whatever comes down, please don't duck!

-R Poeta 11/20/2001

[TASMANIANRED]

A very clever idea Diva.. Should be a lot of fun.

I did compose a limerick last week but it was too naughty to post....

[grey_whiskers]

[anti-Clinton limerick deleted]

As it happens, I am starting to do daily political limericks, so here are the previous three:

1.A Senator, Max, from Montana
Preferred Indians to Indiana
He thinks we are snobs
Just for wanting our jobs
I know! Lets outsource Max to Havana!

2.Judge Alito went to the Senate
"Roe v. Wade?" they asked him; "Again' it?"
He looked in their eyes
and said (no surprise)
"I dunno if you can defen' it!"

3.A Congressman, named Tom Delay,
was indicted, which caused him to say:
"My pro-se-cu-toor's
a political whore
What else d'ya_expect me to say?"

And just for kicks, Tomorrow's limerick today:

A suit by the ACLU
wants to keep Bush from syping on you
But that ol' NSA
keeps Al Qaeda at bay
so I wish they'd just STFU!

(Alternate last line:
so I wish they'd acquire a clue!)

Cheers!

[HiJinx]

See, I can't even ad lib right!

I remember the general sense of that story from grade school.

[Mygirlsmom]

A crusty ol' gal name of Hillary
has a voice that's increasingly shrillery
"Got some dough?" she once said
"We'll just take it instead."
"And deposit it all in our Tillery."

[Arm_Bears]

A clean one from Shel Silverstein -

There are too many kids in this tub,
There are too many elbows to scrub.
I just washed a behind,
that I know wasn't mine;
There are too many kids in this tub.

[grey_whiskers]

There was a young man from Nantucket
Who kept all his brains in a bucket
And (to me) he said
As he emptied his head
"I regret the tsunami in Phuket!"

Cheers!

[Horatio Gates]

LOL...those are great. You've inspired me. I'm gonna work on some more here 8>)

[grey_whiskers]

Learn to type, grey.

Post 29, "syping" should be "spying..."

Cheers!

[Fast Moving Angel]

Yup, that's what we meant to write ... honest!

[Horatio Gates]

LOL!

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Uncle Crakcer-Follow Me (here)

[Kimmers]

There once was a women Named Hillary
Who took a man named Ted to a distillery

They consumed so much liquor
And started to bicker

Over who had the right to attract the queerly

[Diva Betsy Ross]

LOL! *excellent*

[mylife]

Here is to todays thread Diva Betsy Ross
Its composition so neat and so gloss
Were all sittin here ryhmin
Whilst passing the time 'n'
Admiring your thread, Its the Boss!

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Can you clean it up a bit.. I want to see it!

[Diva Betsy Ross]

I love it! Thanks!

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Very good! I love it!

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Hey welcome to the Canteen! That is a very clever!

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Well that is original Mr. Writer..... ;]

[Diva Betsy Ross]

You are a stinker.. ;]

[AnAmericanMother]

I'm running out of clean ones fast . . .

A bather whose clothing was strewed
By breezes that left her quite nude,
Saw a man come along
And, unless I am wrong,
You expected this line to be lewd.

[Diva Betsy Ross]

That is very sweet Tonk~thank you.

[doug from upland]

Scary choices, on that you can bank
To not face them your Lord you can thank
Would you rather be stuck
On a bridge in Ted's truck
Or a closet with Congressman Frank?