If anyone ever insists that she have an actual debate, her voice alone will scraaaaatch off many voters.
And the usual droning-when-not-screeching,11 midwestern-twanged-except-when-g-droppin'-preachin'-to-blacks-or-rubes 7 missus clinton was her usual arrogant, banal self, a familiar affect, which she invariably punctuates--just in case--with congruous and correspondingly condescending thematic attire. Gingham-cum-flag-pin is her standard rube/red-state garb. 8 Predictably, missus clinton donned a mandarin-collared shirt--no flag pin in sight--to pander to the Asian-infused, ultra-left-wing San Francisco set. But she forgot, apparently, to look in the mirror: The image on the screen was more Mao than mandarin 9. Yet some would argue, perversely, that the Mao look was, in fact, precisely what made her choice of attire absolutely perfect. This is the first in a series of (oops!) inadvertent disclosures made by the not very swift missus clinton during her chitchat with Jane Pauley in the city by the bay. THE (oops!) INADVERTENT (TERRORISM) ADMISSIONS OF BILL + HILLARY CLINTON
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During a series of small-town gatherings, Clinton told the rural crowds that she much preferred meeting with them to television appearances on shows like "Meet the Press." "It's the nuts-and-bolts stuff of being a senator, as opposed to being on TV, talking about stuff, which I could do every night if I wanted to," the superstar senator explained. Her newfound affinity for rural constituents stands in marked contrast to her days in Arkansas, where she used to dismiss such encounters with four-letter epithets. The New York senator's former business partner, Susan McDougal, described one such encounter in 1996 for "Blood Sport" author James Stewart. As McDougal looked on during a political reception, an Arkansas woman approached Mrs. Clinton with the gift of a pair of "razorback earrings" in the shape of hogs. She asked Hillary to put them on, but the then-Arkansas first lady icily demurred. After the gift giver moved away, Clinton blurted out to McDougal, "See, this is the kind of s--t I have to put up with here." Hillary Tells NRA Member: I Used to Be a Duck Hunter |
That's precisely the point, you dud. But the obsessively perfectionistic dodo wasn't able to fake even one wrong answer in the Letterman phony "pop quiz," a nostalgic electuary of "Twenty-One" fraud and (Groucho) Marxist left-wing crow. Instead, this documented incompetent with no apparent creative or analytic (not to mention thespian) skills gushed forth with a lame--"It's the bluebird--I know that" --globally exposing herself to be the corrupt clown that the sentient among us already know she is. It is no accident--and the Sheehy hagiography notwithstanding, it is certainly not because of any patriarchal society--that this reflexive kleptocrat never sought office. She never ran simply because she is a perfectionist and an incompetent who cannot tolerate personal (as opposed to bill-related) criticism, witness the prescreened, heavily controlled, sycophantic crowds, her pre-programmed, totally scripted appearances (or, alternatively, her totally mute "listening tour"), her unavailability to the press, indeed, her "bluebird." Thus, the question begging to be asked is this: Why would this compulsively perfectionistic grotesquerie allow herself to be unambiguously exposed as the utter incompetent and fraud and fool and horror that she is? And why would this self-proclaimed protector of "the children" prolong her own child's profound trauma by forcing her own bottom-heavy self, soiled in its own right, onto the political stage?
The answer, I believe, resides more in liberty loss than in power gain. Simply put, she is not running for office; she is running from indictment. And I fear Starr successor, Robert Ray, is unable to catch her... Ray's recent statement , " I have been charged with responsibly conducting the work of this office. Some of my responsibility is to ensure that there is no untoward effect on the political process," both confirms and encourages this latest round of clinton raping, pillaging, despoiling, destroying. Will this nightmare never end?
hillary's head revisited: hillary clinton, by contrast, subsists on cozy clintonoid interviews of the Colmes kind... In her new book, Political Fictions, Joan Didion indicts the fakery of access journalism practiced by vacant politicos like the clintons, whom she sees as "purveyors of fables of their own making, or worse, fables conceived by political strategists with designs on votes, not news." (More Didion: "No one who ever passed through an American public high school could have watched William Jefferson Clinton running for office in 1992 and failed to recognize the familiar predatory sexuality of the provincial adolescent.")
THE HILLARY, YOU KNOW, CLINTON TRANSCRIPT: Background: Using internal polling, the clinton 'infrastructure' determined that its cozy-clintonoid-interviews-of-the-Colmes/King-kind-scheme is no longer working. The scheme, which successfully shepherded and shielded the vacuous, inept, corrupt clintons for nine years, is now, post-9/11, yielding diminishing returns--and worse--increasing ridicule. Hence, we had the clinton 'infrastructure' interviewer recalculation last week that specified more interviewer gravitas...and less lapdog...but not more doggedness...that is to say...that specified Jeff Greenfield. A miscalculation, as it turned out. Greenfield made up in contempt what he lacked in inexorability. Although he conducted the entire interview circumambulating on eggshells, Greenfield did eventually ask the hard-boiled questions... Analysis: Greenfield's circuitous path to clinton depravity and failure necessitates a nonlinear analysis of the data; we will use a least squares curve fitter. Proportional hazards political survival regression analysis will generate a political survival curve for hillary clinton, which will show her viability (so to speak) over time. Political survival time is defined as the length of the interval between the initial political trial balloon and political moribundity. Political moribundity is defined as two consecutive political failures--(one in the case of 9/11), or three not-necessarily-consecutive boo-filled public appearances, or one instance of a serious proposal generating laughter. Survival is influenced by one or more factors, called "predictors" or "covariates", which may be categorical (such as the quality of 'infrastructure') or continuous (such as intellect or eloquence or character). Results:
"Bird of paradise" would have been a brilliant wrong answer for the New-York-state-bird question; in one fell swoop it would have flattered the necessary constituency, rendered hillary's cheating marginally believable and suggested a quick, secure, creative mind.
Or catch on. (On second thought, maybe the problem is that he does....)
COPYRIGHT MIA T 2000, 2005
hillary clinton's brain (such as it is)
he smartest woman in the world would relish "the raucous give and take of American democracy, " as Charles Kuralt once put it.
Analyzed and Annotated
January 22, 2002
(viewing movie requires Flash Player 7, available HERE)
ASIDE: The tough questioning was followed by Greenfield's sudden, post-interview departure from CNN, a development which will only further reinforce cozy-clintonoid-interviews-of-the-Colmes/King-kind 4th-estate malfeasance.
ASIDE: Since by any of these standards, hillary clinton is already flatlined, the more interesting question for this analysis would be: "What the hell is this moribund loser doing in the political arena, anyway?"
NB(2-06):
(MISSUS CLINTON SUPPORTS ALITO FILIBUSTER)
THE ALTERNATE UNIVERSE OF ANNE KORNBLUT
COPYRIGHT MIA T 2006