Nothin' new here. Just go to ANY suburban shopping mall these days......I just wish they'd get the "walk" right, hehehehe.
Posted on 03/28/2006 11:11:06 AM PST by Tom D.
Change Your Ethnicity Day
Mar 27, 2006
by Mike S. Adams
The other day I logged on to my university’s website to investigate rumors that the administration has been using the site to exaggerate the number of minorities on our overwhelmingly white campus. After I heard a colleague’s extraordinary claim – namely, that there are more blacks on the front page of the site than on the entire campus - I was taken aback. So I decided to do a little experiment.
My simple experiment involved recording the races of the first 20 people I saw featured in the pictures that rotate in and out of the front page of http://www.uncw.edu/. The final count was three Asians (15%), eight Whites (40%), and nine Blacks (45%). The problem, of course, is that UNCW has always been around 90% white with a black population in the single digits – usually around 6%. (Author’s Note: There was a brief drop from 6% Black to 4% Black after the university spent its first one million dollars on improving diversity).
Those who believe that the discrepancy between a) the actual racial distribution of students, faculty, and staff at UNCW, and b) the distribution represented on the website is accidental are free to do so. They are also free to believe in the existence of Bigfoot and the validity of professional wrestling. I couldn’t care less. I’m just excited about a new idea inspired by this experiment.
My new idea is an official “Change Your Ethnicity Day” at UNCW. Actually, I got the idea from the Leadership Institute in Washington, DC. But, I’m not going to give them any credit. I got that idea – stealing people’s ideas without giving them credit – from Ward Churchill.
The Leadership Institute’s decision to launch a “Change Your Ethnicity Day” probably really was inspired by Ward Churchill. And knowing that Churchill got a job as Director of an Ethnic Studies program by saying he’s an Indian - without any actual proof, of course - will inspire UNCW students to participate in the event in massive numbers.
All UNCW students have to do on (Change Your) Ethnicity Day is to stop by the Registrar’s Office to have their race changed from White (or Asian, or Hispanic, or Native American, or “Other”) to Black. Once they do so, they will be eligible for lots of free stuff without having to earn it.
White students participating in Ethnicity Day don’t have to worry about getting in trouble for lying about race simply for their own personal gain. After all, they learned to do that from UNCW administrators who seek career advancement by telling lies about improving diversity without actually improving diversity. If that accusation seems harsh, just check out the website.
UNCW Ethnicity Day will also have some unforeseen benefits for Black students. Recently, numerous Black students began pressuring SGA Officer Candidates to promise to fight for more minority scholarships on campus instead of fighting for more merit scholarships. These students want to be judged by the color of their skin, not the content of their character.
After Ethnicity Day, there will be no need to worry about the “under-representation” of Blacks on campus. Almost everyone will be pretending to be Black after Ethnicity Day. And just pretending is good enough for an administration that specializes in make-believe diversity.
Nonetheless, I want to keep the minority scholarships after Ethnicity Day, even if every UNCW student decides to re-register as Black. Then, we will simply distribute the scholarship money at random. That makes sense – philosophically speaking - in light of North Carolina’s adoption of an educational lottery. I propose calling the minority scholarships “Junior King Luther Martin Scholarships” to reflect the university’s backward thinking on racial issues.
Of course, the greatest benefit of UNCW Ethnicity Day is that the sudden rise in the Black student population will help us get rid of Chancellor Rosemary DePaolo. By making her a national leader in make-believe diversity – and that makes sense in an age of make-believe racism – we can ship her off to a more prestigious university. I hear that Harvard has an opening for candidates with an innate weakness in math and science.
Sure, my idea for Ethnicity Day is controversial (thanks again, Ward Churchill!). In fact, few of you can probably believe I had the guts to write this column. But, there’s no need to worry. I can say anything about diversity because I’ll soon be Black. Before you know it, they’ll put me on the website.
Dr. Adams will speak at UNC-Charlotte on March 28th. The speech will take place at 7:00 PM in Woodward Hall (Room 120). He will speak at the University of New Hampshire on April 18th. Details to follow.
Mike Adams is a criminology professor at the University of North Carolina Wilmington and is a regular columnist for Townhall.com.
Copyright © 2006 Townhall.com
The Southeast corner to be exact.
I wanna be a pygmy for a day!
I love Mike Adams' columns. It makes me happy to think how many ulcers the Liberals must get from them.
Can I be a lesbian? I always thought I was a lesbian in a man's body anyway.
Yeah, you need a change from being a twerp! :P
A hottie lipstick type or a bulldyke?
Or I can be a stick in the mud. See what it feels like to be YOU! LOL
I've always thought of myself as the lipstick lesbian. The bullish ones tend to scare me.
I love the choice of wording, throwing Martin Luther King Jr. right at them.
If I tell the university that I'm a dead radical militant Muslim, can I then appeal to them to provide 72 virgins, or coeds, or some similar arrangement. Just for the day of course.
Not without the surgery, no, not technically.
This topic reminds me of commercials you always see in advertising. Four or five guys sitting around on a Saturday afternoon, watching a sports' event, and what do you see? An African-American, an Asian, one chubby white guy, and usually another white guy that looks just a little on the gay side. My weekend get-togethers just aren't nearly as diverse.
Those, believe it or not, are crips gang signs.
The funny thing is, REAL crips would LAUGH at our friends here....just before they beat Larry, Curly, and Moe down....
LOL. You'd make a fine lesbo, I'm sure!
May you wake up tomorrow with Helen on one side and Hillary on the other, making you into a big Pissant sandwich!
Can I become Tierra Del Fuegan?
I want to be a Klingon!
Some days I think I'm a Pentode. Other days I think I'm a Triode.
Circling around Uranus? :-)
Then I retract my statement your honor!
I want to be Irish for a day. Great food, music, beer, and pretty girls.
Thank you from an Irish "girl".
Irish girls want to be Italian so they will get a great tan instead of sunburns, and have that great Italian hair.
Don't forget that the gay looking white guy has a full head of hair and a buff body and the straight looking one is balding dork looking kind of guy.
Better than a diode, I suppose.
I want to be Hispanic, so I can get the free health care and in-state tuition at any university in the country. Or maybe I'll be a Native American, so I can start my own tribe, call myself Chief Standing Pat, and open a thousand-room casino/hotel on my underdeveloped, sacred, native land in downtown San Francisco. ;)
'cept the Irish gals like yanks better than the irish dudes with bad teeth!
I'd like to be British for a day (though thats more a change in national origin rather than ethnicity). In fact, I'l like to be John Steed from the old Avengers tv show. :-)
Or you can be black liberal, so if you ever get fired from a job, 50 lawyers will rush to your side and get you respected ($$) again.
Absolutely. Thanks for the clarification!
No problem. The govmnt has never given us an official definition of black or white, so we are free to put down whatever we want.
And I'd like to be Mr. Peel.
"Democrats pi$$ me off..."
I'm so damned confused.
Thirty-eight years ago, when I left Cuba, I went from being "Caucasian" to "other" in the space of a forty minute flight.
I've never been able to go back.
I've tried checking "Caucasian" in applications and forms since, but they get rejected.
Once you go "other", don't even bother.
Sigh.
I went "other" at a job I once had, and left the fill-in-the-blank part blank. Since the form was submitted "voluntarily", no-one from HR ever challenged it.
That was 14 years ago, and it has not haunted me since.
Don't be hatin'.
LOL! Well, that's what I'm going to say politically from now on, so maybe I'll try it with race, too. ;)
May I be a Drunkard?
Whenever I have to fill out a form asking my race, I always put down "human".
I haven't been called on it yet.
I've been checking the "Other" box and writing on the line next to it "American" for years. Pisses people off to no end. I make sure to do it very dark and circle the Other choice as well, to make sure they don't change it back.
Labels suck as it is. Don't make it easier by labeling yourself.
Better to have your statement retracted then...well, you know.
Can I be shania twain's filipino poolboy? Please?
The term Alky-American is preferred.
Reminds me of the episode of Last Comic Standing where Kathleen Mulligan bemoaned being in a bathing suit at the pool when Tammy Piscatelli was out there.
Can I be shania twain's filipino poolboy? Please?
I'll bet you already perform a lesbian sex act. hehehe
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