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1 posted on 04/06/2006 4:45:16 PM PDT by neverdem
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To: neverdem

My father wasn't too strict on manners (or maybe I got them instilled quickly), but whenever I left an elevator before a woman (even I was closer to the exit), he would grab me by the collar and pull me back.

To this day, if I exit an elevator before a woman, even if it's the only way she can get out, I get a choking sensation.


2 posted on 04/06/2006 5:03:06 PM PDT by Celtjew Libertarian
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To: neverdem
Good article.

manners in my mother’s sense were but etiquette and that in turn etiquette was but a code by which the elite distinguished itself from hoi polloi in order to maintain its economic and cultural dominance

Actually it's the middle class which traditionally had the best manners. The upper class was often just as rude and vulgar as the lower class.

The decline of manners is a symptom of the increasing selfishness and lack of respect for others evident in society.

3 posted on 04/06/2006 5:08:12 PM PDT by SirJohnBarleycorn
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To: neverdem
He's quite right: good manners are taught. I prefer that gentle society of which he recalls. I still practice them. And have been called "overly polite" so often throughout my life, if I had a nickel for every time...

Many years ago, Ann Landers, I recall wrote something of what I very much agree: Good manners are the traffic lights in a civil society. These keep us from crashing into each other. Good article. Thank you for posting it.

4 posted on 04/06/2006 5:09:36 PM PDT by Alia
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To: neverdem

Nice article, neverdem. Maybe a lost cause, but still a worthwhile one.


6 posted on 04/06/2006 5:49:35 PM PDT by speedy
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To: neverdem
It is strange how egalitarianism results in a rabid form of individualism, an angry individualism without worthwhile individuality.

Awesome observation.

Not only do the ceremoniousness and formality help to smooth the rough edges of social interaction, but they allow some grading of such interaction, according to degrees of desired or achieved intimacy. Formality, moreover, is the precondition of subtlety and even of irony; without formality, life becomes coarse-grained and crude. The distinction between friendliness and friendship becomes blurred so that it is no longer even perceived.

Yes. Wow. So true. I went through my "egalitarian bratty slob" phase and nothing snapped me out of it faster than becoming a teacher in an inner-city middle school. Seeing how repulsive crudity really is straightened my spine immediately.

7 posted on 04/06/2006 6:03:35 PM PDT by wizardoz
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To: neverdem

Some very wise observations from Dr.Dalrymple (my favorite psychiatrist!) Good manners are not just superficial, pro forma behaviour. They are an essential part of the glue that makes a society a CIVIL society and part of a larger civilization. They presuppose mutual respect. By the way, when Dalrymple referred to the decline of good manners in Britain this dreadful state of affairs is described in his book "Life at the Bottom". Sadly, I think we're heading in the same direction. Rudeness, incivility, and lack of respect for persons, property, and authority have permeated our society. I think it's sort of like the frog put into the pot of warm water while the temperature is gradually increased. By the time the water boils it's too late. So we have become so gradually vulgarized and calloused that we don't realize what's happened to our own culture.


10 posted on 04/06/2006 6:13:50 PM PDT by T.L.Sink (stopew)
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To: neverdem
I noticed years ago that Hollywood and TV were stressing informal interactions and poor manners as being normal. Now, I can't watch anything that doesn't have characters using restrooms, talking while eating, and being rude to one another as though it's normal. Not that this is the only reason for it, but it's much harder to reinforce manners and etiquette to our children (and adults) when they are inundated with images of "cool" people lacking them.

I have worked very hard to get my son to realize that manners are tools in his toolbox of skills that will help him for the rest of his life. I often remind him that something simple like knowing which fork to use during a formal dinner could determine the outcome of getting a job or a contract. When I'm not around, he opens the doors for his mother and other ladies (he might realize how this could be useful for future dates...)

This article covers quite a bit of the subversive nature of the Left. What also could have been mentioned is that the Left has convinced generations that following traditions is silly and conformist. Somehow, if you do what your parents did, you aren't an individual- this is how they get people to NO LONGER honor their parents or tradition. If children can be convinced to not be like their parents, they'll have to let go of manners, because their parents had manners and social etiquette. I believe this has been part of the modus operandi of the Left to get to the egalitarian utopia they so desire.

That's my rant for the night. Thanks for reading.

12 posted on 04/06/2006 7:02:03 PM PDT by DilJective (Proudly serving in the US Army)
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To: wardaddy; Joe Brower; Cannoneer No. 4; Criminal Number 18F; Dan from Michigan; Eaker; King Prout; ..
Some Brits get it,

'9/11 Changed Everything'

and others don't.

'Let burglars off with caution', police told

Hidden Bombs (Extremely Important Article on Immigration)

From time to time, I’ll ping on noteworthy articles about politics, foreign and military affairs. FReepmail me if you want on or off my list.

14 posted on 04/07/2006 12:58:32 PM PDT by neverdem (May you be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows that you're dead.)
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To: neverdem

Good article. My father and mother believed in good manners. Sometimes I think they took it too far, such as when we ate. My dad insisted that the left hand remained in your lap with your napkin unless you were cutting something. To this day I eat with my left hand on my lap. If he saw that hand was up for no reason he would poke it with his fork. Your elbow , he would really start poking. I think good manners are a great asset and it is a shame more people dont use them.


15 posted on 04/07/2006 1:10:43 PM PDT by pandoraou812 ( barbaric with zero tolerance and dilligaf?)
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To: neverdem
Formality, moreover, is the precondition of subtlety and even of irony; without formality, life becomes coarse-grained and crude. The distinction between friendliness and friendship becomes blurred so that it is no longer even perceived.

Typical pommie bahstahd. Not the full quid.

16 posted on 04/07/2006 1:27:34 PM PDT by archy (I am General Tso. This is my Chief of Staff, Colonel Sanders....)
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To: neverdem
Image hosted by Photobucket.com i drive this young cow at work crazy because i say Thank You to her(and the others)every time she puts work on my desk, which is about 10 to 15 times a day, to the point that she won't even look at me any more when she does it.

she is almost turned completely around before she puts them on my desk with her back to me.

i think i pissed her off when she ask me why i always said thank you when people put work on my desk???

i told her for the same reason others don't... it's the way i was raised.

that's when it started... and someday, she's going to fall down doing it, and hurt a goodly part of her 300+lb azz!!!

17 posted on 04/07/2006 1:53:42 PM PDT by Chode (1967 UN Outer Space Treaty is bad for America and bad for humanity - DUMP IT. American Hedonist )
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