Skip to comments.From gay to God
Posted on 04/30/2006 5:01:22 PM PDT by DBeers
"I WAS EXCLUSIVELY HOMOSEXUAL; I had never been with a woman."
That's part of the riveting testimony of the Reverend Darryl Foster, a board member of Exodus Global Alliance a Christian organisation made up largely of former-homosexuals who promote the message that "change is possible through the power of Jesus Christ".
The Texas, United States, native was one of the featured speakers at the just concluded three-day conference: Sex, Sexuality and Homosexuality: Engaging The Truth hosted by Project PROBE Ministries, at the Sherbourne Conference Centre.
Foster, 45, is now a heterosexual who confesses that the first and only woman he has ever been with sexually is his wife of 13 years.
They have five children together but prior to that he was a practising homosexual for 11 years and declares he has been "free" of that lifestyle for the past 16 years.
"I was extreme in terms of my feelings for men. I got to the point where I literally hated women; I had no uses for them.
"But I'm a miracle of God that He can take something so messed up and turn it around. That's the power of God!" he told the SUNDAY SUN.
He grew up in the small town of Marlin, Texas, in a deeply religious household of "hard-core Pentecostals".
There was no father figure around and, as a boy, he was molested by a male in his church. The molestation started when he was 13 years old and continued until he was 17.
But from the time Foster was 11 years of age, he was attracted to other boys. He didn't have a name for the strange feelings he was experiencing, but he knew he was different from other boys.
He kept these feelings to himself, fearing he would be ostracised. So, like a good Christian, he went on attending church, "shouting, dancing and speaking in tongues".
However, his feelings toward members of the same sex grew stronger. At that time, and sadly still, homosexuality wasn't widely discussed in the church.
"The one thing I find is that they [Pentecostals] and I can only talk about Pentecostals, don't address it. Nobody told me, this is how you deal with these feelings. All I was told was if you feel that way or if you are that way you are going to hell.
"I knew I didn't want to go to hell but I didn't know how to stop or get rid of what was going on inside of me. I was having thoughts that didn't go away after I prayed," explained the reverend.
It wasn't until college that Foster fully explored his feelings.
College life was filled with others who were actively involved in homosexuality. And soon enough, he too embraced that lifestyle.
It wasn't until many years later, when he had pursued all the sexual partners he wanted to pursue, that he felt an overwhelming dissatisfaction with his life.
It reached the point where he actually started to plan his suicide during the Easter of 1990. He felt alienated from the church, God and his family and didn't think his life was worth living.
"It was during that time of utter despair that the Lord came to me via a movie about the passion of Jesus Christ. I saw this scene with Him struggling with the cross, being battered by men, suffering and humiliated.
"In my own suffering, I became engrossed in His suffering. It was at that time I heard Christ say: 'I did this for you'. Something broke inside of me; something supernatural happened that made me say: 'God how could you love me when you know all I've done?'
"And He said to me, 'But I do love you". It was at that time I asked God to forgive me for all the years that I was rebellious against Him.
"That day, He forgave me, He saved me, He filled me with His spirit and I became a new creature in Christ all at once. I walked away that day, and I've been walking further and further away every day since then," said an excited Foster.
The transformation from homosexual to heterosexual didn't happen overnight, however. It took time to resolve all the anger and emotions and the relationship issues he was carrying on the inside.
God, he explained, began to change him until he got a picture of who he was "not just as Darryl Foster but of who I was as God's son".
"When my spiritual identity started to come in place then I could see my path as a man much more clearly not a broken man, not a man who was sexually attracted to other men, but a man who had a destiny with God and I began to follow that destiny," he said adding:
"A lot of things you do in the gay lifestyle are habitual. I had to literally 'unlearn' it. God re-oriented me. You have sexual orientation, sexual disorientation, and sexual re-orientation where God says this is the way you should go. That's the path I follow."
The reverend, who wrote a book on his life-changing experience entitled: Touching A Dead Man, doesn't subscribe to the belief that homosexuals are genetically programmed that way.
He believes it is a choice one makes and just as drug addicts and alcoholics can overcome their addictions, so can homosexuals, with the help of God.
In 1996 he co-founded with his wife an outreach ministry called 'WITNESS' particularly geared towards helping men and women of colour who find themselves in "unwanted" homosexuality.
It is not for the homosexual who wants to remain a homosexual, but it is for those who have decided: "God, I need help. I don't want to be this way".
He says he has seen the lives of hundreds of people most of whom have grown up in the church" transformed through this ministry.
And whereas the church had an excuse in the past for not dealing with the issue of homosexuality, Foster said it didn't have one anymore.
"There is a lot more openness now. I don't blame the church for my choices. But now God has given them more revelation, I don't think the church has an excuse to say: 'We don't know'.
"We (Exodus Global Alliance) are here to say to people: 'Here is what God wants you to know about all of these people who are in your churches serving, sometimes in high positions, but who are torn up. What we are doing here is planting a seed and, hopefully, there will be someone to water it," he said.
This one should have the pro-homo cheerleaders and the God-haters both up in arms. Heh-heh, they deserve each other!
It's an okay testimony but he does blame the church while he excuses himself. He couldn't help it. He was a victim. It would be infinitely more powerful if he simply accepted all the blame for his own sinful heart, desires, and deeds. No one else is to blame. The church is supposed to be innocent on these matters. I think it is tragic how knowlegable everyone is about the gory details of this particular sin. Just accept the blame, repent and go on. Stop expecting Christians to be experts on the ins and outs of perversity. Being shocked and appalled is merely a sign of their own innocence. That's a good thing really. Or it used to be.
Thanks for posting this article.
Additional note: Have you noticed that "homosexual agenda" doesn't seem to be in the keyword thingie lately? Have you figured out how it gets there? How many searches are done? How many times people type it in as a keyword?
I was thinking the same thing, but you do have to remember who is writing the article. Reporters are manipulative low-lifes. This guy was probably interviewed and his story parsed together to make it seem like he is someone he is not.
It seems to me that this man has humbled himself before a Holy God.
The topic is potentially a dual edged lightning rod.
I have not consciously made an effort to determine definitively the method. I assume that a formulaic method is employed with several factors including article topic(s), article popularity (# of posts & page imprints), article date, etcetera...
What everyone forgets in this age of no guilt (blame your mother) is that no matter what your circumstances, you are 100% to blame for your own choices and sins. It's our fallen nature that loves to blame others.
Well we certainly shouldn't dismiss his story. He was molested by a homosexual (recruited) and lived that life until he turned to Christ.
How many homosexuals were molested as children by other homosexuals? I would really like to see a study done on that.
LJ, DBeers, Do you know of a study done on this?
I completely sympathize with his abuse story. But it is vital for victims to understand that if and when they sin, they are 100% guilty and responsible regardless of their past. God won't be handing out get-out-of-sin-free cards to anyone (aside from those who with repentant faith, confess Jesus as Savior and Lord of their life). Everyone has a story about how they were wronged by others because we live in a world packed full of sinners. Accept the blame for your own sins. That's the only right response.
I am sure that the APA at one time had and or commissioned such research PRIOR to blindly embracing all things homosexual; however, I myself can not recall anything...
Scripter might be able to reference something though.
I will put looking for any studies on this on my to do list and ping you should I find anything.
Let me add that I think the man who molested him should be prosecuted if it is not too late. If it is, he should be exposed by name so that he cannot victimize anyone else. Nothing makes me more angry than the sexual abuse of children. But it doesn't change the truth about this guy's own sinful heart, lusts, deeds, etc., any more than a child who is beaten has an excuse to grow up and to beat his own offspring. Everyone has a story. It's no excuse. You sin because you are a sinner, not because you were sinned against.
Your post reminds me of something:
In addition it's now against the law for psychiatrists to try to 'treat' a homosexual who wants to change because it is "not" abnormal.
I wonder if they can touch the churches tho. This would be, maybe should be, something the churches should be doing.
Perhaps that's precisely what happened with this guy. It just gets a little lost with some of the stuff about what churches should and shouldn't know about homosexuality, especially since the m.o. of gay activists is to blame Christians for their troubles. Being innocent about sin should be a good thing.
Proverbs 16:2 All a man's ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the LORD.
Proverbs 17:15 Acquitting the guilty and condemning the innocent the LORD detests them both.
Romans 16:19 Everyone has heard about your obedience, so I am full of joy over you; but I want you to be wise about what is good, and innocent about what is evil.
I disagree with the comment simply because a pastor is supposed to lead and instruct his flock in the way God expects us to act. A church who refuses to discuss certain topics such as homosexuality and dating by shoving them on the shelf isn't warning his flock of the dangers. In all of the churches I have ever been to I have only heard one pastor who hit the nail on the head about the issue of dating. I have been in more churches than I could count as my family has moved every few years for the last 22 years. The one pastor I speak of that discussed dating made the following comment: "Today's pastors are not willing to discuss 'controversial' topics because they are afraid that it will create discord among their congregations. BUT, these are the issues that are the most important because God cares about our actions. It is time now for pastors to bring these issues into the open and speak loudly for Jesus and all that he stands for!"
Now, the argument for dating is a more sensitive issue because there is no Biblical mandate prohibiting it. However, our bodies are to be the Lord's temple and we are supposed to be holy and blameless before him. The main point of all this is that there IS a Biblical mandate against homosexuality!! Pastors should be preaching on this and instead they are completely embracing it!! There is something wrong with this! Yes, we are supposed to accept people as they are, as God accepts us. BUT, God expects us to grow and change in him and become molded in His image. What did God tell Mary Magdalene? He told her to go and sin no more. Therefore we shouldn't be engaging in these practices and we should be making every effort to gently and yet adamantly instruct those who are in sin!!! Churches that openly embrace and encourage an "alternate" lifestyle are not are the right road and neither are churches that are neutral on these issues. Churches and pastors need to get back on track with God and speak his truth, not shove it on the shelf as has been done for years. Now, I do absolutely agree that each individual is responsible for their own actions and we will all one day answer toGod for every sin we have committed. This man isn't vindicated of his sin because he was a "victim". However, I think he made the point that he was to blame; it isn't fair to say that he blame the church while he excuses himself.
Granted it wasn't as clear as it could have been, but it was still there. Just because you admit your own blame doesn't mean you don't speak out against the fault of the church or the man who molested him. Stop expecting Christians to be experts on the ins and outs of perversity.
I don't completely disagree with the statement, however, I will say that by reading their Bibles Christians should know the boundaries of pervisity and therefore by willing to discuss issues and not allow it in the church and openly reject these pervisities. There are now churches that openly embrace gays and even some that are completely made up of gays.
But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.
I believe the Bible speaks plainly about leading others into sin.
I think the pastor and everyone else should preach/teach/speak the truth about homosexuality, that it is condemned by God. It's the hypersensitivity to all the various emotions of those caught up in the sin that I see as unnecessary. And the obsession over professing "love" for homosexuals (ungodly love that helps hide and protect sin), which actually gets in the way of proclaiming the truth. Love them with the gospel and the truth about their sin. There is a trend these days to condemn those who speak the truth and exalt those who go soft on sin, overly identifying with the emotional excuses the sinner gives. That's not love. It's what you call being an accomplice. Or to please the psychobabblers, an enabler.
Praise the Lord...
In case you haven't seen this.
Here are three articles with some info, at least one of the FR links (and maybe both) have more info down the thread as well. Scripter is the man when it comes to knowing all, I haven't seen him lately as he is very busy. Maybe he'll notice this and toss something our way!
How Might Homosexuality Develop?
Putting the Pieces Together
Root Causes, Homosexual Consequences
You are right, a large majority of homosexuals were molested when either pre-pubescent children or young adolescents.
Thanks for picking that statement out. I noticed it and thought about its relevance in other areas of life as well.
By repetition, habits are formed. Desires are reinforced, tastes are developed. How many people who smoke cigarettes really liked the first one (or first pack)? How about alcohol? Many vices (I consider smoking and drinking vices, pick your own habits here) have to be learned and you almost have to "force" yourself in the beginning.
Habits create subtle (and maybe not so subtle) "grooves" in the brain. Brains actually change depending on what we do. We remember past pleasures, shames, guilts, fears, emotional reactions, and they mold future choices.
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure; but if we want a cure badly enough, we'll be willing to do what it takes to make the cure. I've been around the block (more than once) and have unlearned a great many vices and bad habits. We can become new. Our hearts and minds can change, and we can become the servants God wants us to be. It's not that we become something different, it's becoming more who we really are.
Psalms 19:7 The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple.
Galatians 3:24 Therefore the law was our schoolmaster to bring us unto Christ, that we might be justified by faith.
Very appropriate verses. This is why I love FR. The knowledge here is some much greater than even my own Sunday school class. Sometimes when I speak about the law (Exodus 20:1-17)to others they give me a stupid blank look.
What kind of Christian's are we if we don't even know God's commandments?
This teaching was a revelation to me. It is the single most important teaching of my Christian life. Watch it. I beg of you.
My evidence is purely anecdotal but extensive. I worked in the airline industry(a very gay heavy industry) for some years and early molestation was the one common thread between all the gay men I got to know in my time there.
This is beautiful sanity appearing on a confused and sick scene.
I am a tiny soul who would be entirely lost and wretched without the mercy of God that is available to every one of us. The Prodigal Son is my favorite story in the Bible. It is a story of my life, only I was worse.
bump for later
On the other hand there is something to be said about judging by FRUITS. If the rock ribs like you are managing to get almost nobody out of gayness but the "softies" are leading a true "exodus," then something has to be rethought about the way the rock ribs are parsing the Bible.
How many lesbians were molested by heterosexual men? I would really like to see a study done on that.
Someone is probably going to make a cheap pun at your expense, but this is correct.
Many biblical maxims need to be seen in context to make sense. It seems to make more sense that Paul was not preaching that Christians should be ignorant of evils that press themselves upon Christians, but rather was discouraging curiosity seeking. Like "hey, we want to see what is happening in the idol temple across town, the one that never bothers us, just because it would be cool." That would be a no-no, but Paul himself preached a wonderful sermon to idolaters on Mars Hill based on what he already knew about that. Much more than "hey, just don't do it and all will be okay."
I don't hear any blame on the church for his choices. It is a fact though, that bible-believing churches have not, nor do they still, help people deal with this particular sin. It's not enough for churches to acknowlege sin--which of course we must--but we need to help people fight certain sinful patterns in their own lives; this is the process called Christian maturity or sanctification.
Just as many churches sponsor AA or do their own version of it, so too churches need to help people out of sexual sinful habits. One of the main principles of AA is to acknowlege individual responsibilty and not blame anyone else--that doesn't mean churches shouldn't help AA-type programs--even though alcaholism is an individual problem, based on a person's own bad choices.
Divorce in the church is an indicator that MANY active evangelical, born-again, bible-believing Christians have sexual/relationship problems (yes, involving their individual sinful habits) which the Church, as the people of God, need to help them mature out of....and of course that includes repentance, from start to end.
Individual responsibility for sin, AND Church bodies helping people to overcome such sins, are not mutually exclusive.
The homosexual agenda probably wouldn't be nearly so powerful had Churches been doing what they are supposed to do--glorifying God by helping people repent and grow up in spiritual maturity.
Unforunately I don't know of any studies on the subject. I've seen studies that hit on the subject but none specifically on the issue of molestation. While molestation is certainly one avenue into homosexuality, there are many factors involved, and of course environment remains the key factor.
The Root Causes, Homosexual Consequences (People can Change) link has a reference to their own study. The study, a PDF document is very interesting, especially pages 6-9 which hit on the abuse factors. That is, (page 8) ~48% claim to have been sexually abused.
This is worth repeating: different people respond to different stimuli/methods/messages. I say that merely because there are some folks who insist their way is the only way. And in doing so, they put themselves and everybody around them in a box.
Dr. Throckmorton was playing with words when he wrote there is: More than one way out, but that fits with what I'm saying.
Some folks use Christian organizations to leave the homosexual lifestyle. Some use Jewish. Some Mormon. Some secular. Some...