'Superman Returns' is definitely not gay

UPI ^ | June 20, 2006

[Great Communicator]

"Superman Returns" is being advertised on Logo, the gay and lesbian cable TV channel, so the gay magazine, The Advocate, is asking "How Gay Is Superman?"

The Advocate is not trying to claim that Superman is gay.

It points out that like many gays and lesbians, Superman has a secret life. Superman has another identity that he doesn't share with anyone, ABC reported Tuesday.

The film's director, Bryan Singer, who is gay, insisted that Superman "is probably the most heterosexual character in any movie I've ever made."

In the Quentin Tarantino film "Kill Bill: Vol. 2," the character Bill shares his view on what Clark Kent, Superman's other half, says about humanity.

"When Superman wakes up in the morning, he's Superman. His alter ego is Clark Kent. His outfit with the big red 'S' -- that's the blanket he was wrapped in as a baby when the Kents found him. Those are his clothes. What Kent wears -- the glasses, the business suit -- that's the costume. That's the costume Superman wears to blend in with us. Clark Kent is how Superman views us. And what are the characteristics of Clark Kent? He's weak. He's unsure of himself. He's a coward. Clark Kent is Superman's critique on the whole human race."

[TexasCajun]

Next from Hollywood:

BrokeBack Super-Heros!

[RexBeach]

I see.

"But don't you just love Superman's cape! It is so fabulous! I can barely stand it!"

We now return you to our regularly scheduled parsing by UPI - longtime employer of that doyen of democracy, Helen Thomas!

[weegee]

Logo is owned by MTV-Viacom and they are both definitely gay.

[lormand]

It is safer to assume "everything in Hollyweird is gay", than to assume it is not.

They find it nessessary to point out that the director is a homo.

I'll pass on yet another movie, and I'll be better for it, I'm sure.

[weegee]

Superman has another identity that he doesn't share with anyone

He doesn't go to the office dressed as Clark Kent? He sits at home in a closet and marvels at himself in the mirror?

[TC Rider]

BrokeBrack Mountain?

[bwteim]

Bryan Singer: "he is probably the most heterosexual character in any movie I've ever made."


Didn't know there were degrees of heterosexuality. You either are or aren't. But then again, I am sure some transgendered challenged individual will straighten me out...

[Maceman]

I know I do.

[DoughtyOne]

It points out that like many gays and lesbians, Superman has a secret life.

If only...

[scott7278]

Here's an interesting observation. In the 1978 film, Superman is fighting for "truth, justice and the American way." By Superman IV, he's a citizen of the world and addresses the U.N. -- and the U.S. and the former Soviet Union were indistinguishable as far as their weapons were concerned.

Thus, Superman turned into a wuss. I almost wanted Nuclear Man to win. It's bad when as a nine-year-old kid I wanted Superman to leave our nukes alone.

[patriciaruth]

If any FReepers go to this movie, please let me know what they thought.

I'm a long time fan of Superman, and currently a fan of Smallville (as I was of TV series Lois and Clark and the Superman movies with Reeve and the comicbooks and the Superman TV series with Reeves).

However, I think I'm not alone among Smallville fans in wanting to see our current Superhero (Tom Welling) be the one to graduate to the red cape and red booties.

So, I'm holding back going to see the new movie till I hear it's not creepy.

[ozzymandus]

Gay? I just read he was Jewish!

[Constitutionalist Conservative]

[Antoninus]

It points out that like many gays and lesbians, Superman has a secret life. Superman has another identity that he doesn't share with anyone, ABC reported Tuesday.

Really? Here's the difference. Superman doesn't sneak around highway rest-stops, doesn't buy gerbils by the pound, and doesn't have a NAMBLA membership card.

[Mr. Silverback]

Clark Kent is Superman's critique on the whole human race."

Clark is weak not because Superman sees us that way, but because Clark has to seem as unlike the Man of Steel as possible.

[IDontLikeToPayTaxes]

What's going to kill this movie is that Lois Lane is a single mother (father unknown) with a live-in boyfriend.

[FrankR]

In one of the episodes of "Lois & Clark", when Lois found out he was Superman, and was angry at him for not confiding in her, Clark said the following:

"Clark Kent is who I am...Superman is what I can do."

Insofar as he was raised as "Clark Kent", and didn't discover his super powers until later, that was a pretty profound and true statement. Sums it up pretty good, I thought.

[weegee]

Well he did have gay allegory subplots in the X-Men films.

Director - filmography
Superman Returns (2006)
"House, M.D."
... aka House (USA: short title)
- Occam's Razor (2004) TV Episode
- Pilot (2004) TV Episode
X2 (2003)
... aka X-Men 2 (Singapore: English title) (USA: working title)
... aka X-2 (USA: poster title)
... aka X-Men 2: X-Men United (USA: promotional title)
... aka X2: X-Men United (USA: promotional title)
X-Men (2000)
... aka X-Men 1.5 (USA: DVD box title)


Apt Pupil (1998)
... aka Élève doué, L' (Canada: French title)
... aka Un élève doué - Été de corruption (France: dubbed version)
The Usual Suspects (1995)
... aka Üblichen Verdächtigen, Die (Germany)
Public Access (1993)


Lion's Den (1988)

[weegee]

So Lois Lane is Murphy Brown now?

[patriciaruth]

Agree about the degeneration of the Superman movies.

So, just how degenerate is this new one is the question.

Notice how they made the red cape and red booties kind of sooty in appearance.

How dark side is Superman in this new movie?

Smallville has done Jor-El dark side and Kal-El dark side episodes. While that was fun for Tom Welling to give a wider spectrum to his developing acting skills, it totally turned off my husband who likes his Superman pure, good and foursquare for America.

I think a lot of the ladies kind of lost track of Superman while enjoying the dangerous and erotic Kal-El, but in the end we also like our Superman to be pure and good and foursquare for America.

[patriciaruth]

Lois Lane is a single mother (father unknown) with a live-in boyfriend.

Oh, please say you are kidding...

[Mr. Silverback]

He doesn't go to the office dressed as Clark Kent? He sits at home in a closet and marvels at himself in the mirror?

Also, it should be pointed out that in the comic book continuity, he has shared it with Lois. Every once in a while he puts on the suit and flies her to Paris or something, but in general, if he's with Lois, even in private, he's Clark.

And Batman, Wonder Woman and Martian Manhunter call him Clark too. There's a reason for that.

[Clemenza]

Maybe, but that song "Superman (It's Not Easy to Be Me), is the GAYEST song of the past five years.

[FreeManWhoCan]

Superman is actually based on the Jewish legend of the Golem. His creators were Jewish and and he has writing on his chest similar to the Golem having writing on his chest.

[Mr. Silverback]

Didn't know there were degrees of heterosexuality. You either are or aren't. But then again, I am sure some transgendered challenged individual will straighten me out...

Maybe Singer is saying, "Just because he's a good looking city dweller doesn't mean he's a metrosexual."

[scott7278]

I will definitely be seeing it, but you raise some good questions. We'll just have to see, I guess.

[Clemenza]

Fan of all of the above, but I thought the last two Superman movies with Reeve were awful.

[scott7278]

I did like the fight between Clark Kent and Evil Superman in the third film, but that scene with the evil sister turning into a robot gave me the creeps.

[Mr. Silverback]

Thus, Superman turned into a wuss. I almost wanted Nuclear Man to win. It's bad when as a nine-year-old kid I wanted Superman to leave our nukes alone.

There's a reason that was the last Superman movie for awhile. It sucked.

Superman II was the best of the bunch, despite the stupid bit where he boinks Lois.

[Clemenza]

I loved the scene where Clark goes back to the Diner and beats the crap out of that Canadian truck driver.

"Funny, I've never seem garbage eating garbage before!"

[Clemenza]

I loved the scene where Clark goes back to the Diner and beats the crap out of that Canadian truck driver.

"Funny, I've never seen garbage eating garbage before!"

[steve-b]

You'd probably appreciate the Jabootu review of Superman IV.

[scott7278]

I liked Superman II the best, also. It had humor in it, without devolving into campiness.

I just have to laugh when watching the third one when Richard Pryor types simple commands into the computer to do the most ridiculous things.

"OVERRIDE ALL SECURITY." Done. And a weather satellite that actually changes the weather? Please! Karl Rove may have one today, but not in 1983.

[7thson]

Exactly! In fact, this is explained in the comics. Superman is Clark Kent's alter ego, while Bruce Wayne is Batman's alter ego.

[Windsong]

How do you know he was a Canuck?

[Kirkwood]

Frank, you're 1000% correct.

[uglybiker]

We now return you to our regularly scheduled parsing by UPI - longtime employer of that doyen of democracy, Helen Thomas!

If anyone could turn a man gay...

[FreedomCalls]

Superman is not gay.

But is he a dick?

[Mr. Silverback]

I loved the scene where Clark goes back to the Diner and beats the crap out of that Canadian truck driver.

Yeah, me too. And one of the great movie moments of all time is the look on Zod's face when Superman crushes his hand. The "Would you care to step outside" line is pretty good, too.

[Centurion2000]

Clark Kent is Superman's critique on the whole human race

That's a pretty interesting analysis ...

[OESY]

Not gay, not human, faster than a falling acorn,
more powerful than a rat, able to leap tall branches
at a single bound, look! Up in the sky! Is it a bird?
Is it a plane? It's Super-Squirrel!

[Clemenza]

Well, it was filmed in British Columbia. Don't know the nationality of the actor, but I always assumed Supey was in Canada when he had the confrontation.

Of course, Sea Bass from Dumb and Dumber was definately Canadian, although he did play for the Boston Bruins.

[Clemenza]

LOL. Great website!

[Kirkwood]

"Superman is actually based on the Jewish legend of the Golem. His creators were Jewish and and he has writing on his chest similar to the Golem having writing on his chest."

Shaloman is much closer to this description.

[Mr. Silverback]

Exactly! In fact, this is explained in the comics. Superman is Clark Kent's alter ego, while Bruce Wayne is Batman's alter ego.

In the Batman Beyond series, a villain was projecting voices into Bruce's mind. Bruce told his protege that he had known all along they were from an external source. Why? "The voices called me Bruce. In my mind, I don't call myself Bruce."

[Donald Rumsfeld Fan]

They find it necessary to point out that the director is a homo.

As if we would think otherwise? Hollywood is a gay town. Heterosexuality is rare.

[patriciaruth]

Agree. The last two movies with Reeve were see once, move on.

[Slings and Arrows]

Gay? I just read he was Jewish!

How the @#$%^! would you perform the bris?!

[patriciaruth]

If you're into Superman v. Clark Kent mind games then Seasons 2 and 3 of Smallville are recommended. The writers mine that territory quite a bit.