Chimp Trying To Quit Smoking

Chinadaily.com ^ | 06/27/06 | Chinadaily.com

[Froufrou]

A chimpanzee at a zoo in Urumqi, capital of the Xinjiang Uygur Autonomous Region, is trying to stop smoking. The chimp, which used to perform in a circus, had previously been smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day. Zookeepers said that the animal would get very uneasy if it didn't get its daily fix of nicotine.

They have been giving it beer in a bid to stop it smoking. The chimp is now on less than four cigarettes a day.

[Froufrou]

But their losing money on the kegs...

[Froufrou]

their = they are

[tumblindice]

I don't smoke, I don't chew,
and I don't go with chimps that do.

(OK, a little RedMan. And a cigar every so often.)

[rightinthemiddle]

Take away its wallet and it can't buy any more cigs.

[synbad600]

Oh yea, beer always makes me smoke less.

[beyond the sea]

Zookeepers said that the animal would get very uneasy if it didn't get its daily fix of nicotine.

The first person who gave the chimp a cigarette is an *ss.

****

By the way........... "their losing money on the kegs... " ----English--- they're losing money.

[beyond the sea]

You're fast. :-)

[samson1097]

I think this is the same chimp that took cigs from visitors standing near the fence.

[Rakkasan1]

for lack of proper I.D., right?

[beyond the sea]

I prefer my chimps with nothing but cantaloupe and strawberries on their breath.

;-)

[beyond the sea]

Theif!

;-)

[Red Badger]

So, they make him an alcoholic to get him to stop smoking?........

[coconutt2000]

Is the chimp trying to stop or are they trying to stop the chimp?

There's a significant difference between the two.

[beyond the sea]

(correction) thief....... (YOI!).....

:-)

[AnotherUnixGeek]

They have been giving it beer in a bid to stop it smoking.

Yeah, replace the nicotine addiction with an alcohol addiction - real smart. Anyone who would get an animal addicted to cigarettes is abusing the animal.

[rightinthemiddle]

Well, it could carry a credit card somewhere.

[Froufrou]

Well, we all know that cigs cost way more than beer...but I think they're deluded if they believe they can break the little guy's habit now...

[Froufrou]

See, that's the point. Like substituting Purina for bananas, how would we like that? Nah...not so much...

[BenLurkin]

Good point.

[robertpaulsen]

That's right!

They should give him some medical marijuana.

[Froufrou]

Of course some idiot must've thought it would be cute to see him mimicking someone smoking. There's no excuse for it, really...

[INSENSITIVE GUY]

"QUIT SMOKING,BECOME AN ALCOHOLIC".I hope he saved his marlboro miles.

[Ditter]

They can't break his habit? Give me a break,he is an animal, he lives in a cage, stop giving him cigarettes! he will get over it.

[Red Badger]

He could have just picked up the habit from hanging around the wrong crowd...........

[4yearlurker]

Just raise the smoking age on chimps....And execute anyone who gives him cigarettes.

[Mase]

Yeah, replace the nicotine addiction with an alcohol addiction

I used to be a heroin addict now I'm a methadone addict.

[Froufrou]

Mebbe he can get a gig doing Marlboro Man commercials...scarf, denim shirt, little cowboy hat...

[Teacher317]

This is China. They might be doing that anyway.

[mallardx]

This is a horrible example to set for younger monkeys. Having a smoking, drinking monkey is just poor animal management, all the way around.

[Ditter]

Now that he has retired from the circus, that might work for him. I wonder if he inhales?

[Mase]

He could have just picked up the habit from hanging around the wrong crowd...........

I think this guy is to blame:

[Froufrou]

I know, it's really tragic. All in all, worse than hurling stuff at passersby, really...

[4yearlurker]

I know! Anybody near the chimp cage must show their organ donor card.

[LexBaird]

So, when he gets a beer gut, will they give him cigs to suppress his appetite??

[Froufrou]

It's probably a good thing he has that problem with hirsutes...hides the wrinkles...

[MediaMole]

After he stops smoking, they'll give him heroin to stop the drinking.

[Froufrou]

What if he moves on to better alcohol...Chivas...fine Cubans...and cigars!

[2 Kool 2 Be 4-Gotten]

Just cut out his morning coffee and newspaper - he probably just picks up a cigarette out of habit when he sits down with his coffee and newspaper.

[Rakkasan1]

my cartoon bubble has a teenage store clerk telling the monkey there's no such thing as a $2 bill.

[tumblindice]

(Obscure `Taxi Driver' reference*)
Think he flicks his live butts at gawkers?

[Red Badger]

Hurling stuff?.........you know what kinda stuff apes throw?........

[Cobra64]

[Space Wrangler]

Yes, that would be like trying to give up jelly by switching to peanut butter. ;>))

[Froufrou]

Careful, you're starting to read me like a book... ;o)

[LexBaird]

Everyone in China is a potential organ donor ... often involuntarily.

[tort_feasor]

I just quit last week, I empathize with the chimp.

[Froufrou]

It gets easier. You may eat a few pillows in your sleep, but hey, after two weeks you should be fine.

[tumblindice]

4 years for me, FRiend.*
1.) lots of cinnamon red-hots.
2.) buy some new trousers two sizes too big, tonight.
3.) avoid Chinese chimps, bars & other smokers for at least 6 months.
I took the weight off and can take a deep breath now without startling the cat and kid.
You can do it, if *you* really want to.

[Old Professer]

How about those people who get rats addicted to carcinogenic compounds?

[stylecouncilor]

ping