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Funny Answers From Real Students
Daves Daily ^ | 08/17/06 | Unknown

Posted on 08/17/2006 10:45:16 AM PDT by Froufrou

1. What happens to your body as you age? When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

2. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

3. What is artificial insemination? When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

4. How can you delay milk turning sour? Keep it in the cow.

5. How are the main parts of the body categorized? The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.

6. What is the Fibula? A small lie.

7. What does "varicose" mean? Nearby.

8. What is the most common form of birth control? Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

9. Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section." The caesarean section is a district in Rome.

10. What is a seizure? A Roman emperor.

11. What is a terminal illness? When you are sick at the airport

12. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: humor
Better study, there'll be testes!
1 posted on 08/17/2006 10:45:16 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou; Millee; Maximus; wallcrawlr

Pingaroo, I see you.


2 posted on 08/17/2006 10:45:59 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou

Hey Froufrou...you're nuts. ;-)


3 posted on 08/17/2006 10:47:30 AM PDT by Dark Skies
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To: Dark Skies

How ya doon? Good to C ya...got any new favorite baldy chickies?


4 posted on 08/17/2006 10:48:41 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou

I'd be real interested to know the ages of these students..


5 posted on 08/17/2006 10:48:45 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32 (I'm a Patriot Guard Rider..www.patriotguard.org for info)
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To: Froufrou
These were students from the California public schools, I assume. Our education budget is nearly $60 BILLION and we are next to last of all the states in achievement. Thanks, teachers' unions! You're doing a great job!
6 posted on 08/17/2006 10:49:15 AM PDT by hsalaw
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To: hsalaw

Wow, IIRC CA used to be among the best! Back in the late 70s...


7 posted on 08/17/2006 10:52:04 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou
...got any new favorite baldy chickies?

lol...no new ones, but you have reminded me to be on the lookout.

8 posted on 08/17/2006 10:52:25 AM PDT by Dark Skies
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

Scary, eh? Bet there are some in the upper classes, you know, 8th grade and up... ;o)


9 posted on 08/17/2006 10:52:49 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou
Sounds like Art Linkletter's Kids say the darndest things show.
10 posted on 08/17/2006 10:54:11 AM PDT by MrEdd (More cheep than a flock of baby chickens.)
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To: Froufrou

No longer. If it weren't for Arkansas (I think it's Arkansas; might be Mississippi), we'd be last in scholastic achievement.


11 posted on 08/17/2006 10:54:44 AM PDT by hsalaw
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To: Froufrou

Hee Hee, thanks for the laughs!

I am guilty of a gross stupidity myself, on a test back in junior high. (That's what we called it back then!) On a question in science class about who discovered penicillin, I wrote down William Penn.


12 posted on 08/17/2006 10:55:28 AM PDT by Theresawithanh (Every time I hear the word "exercise", I wash my mouth out with chocolate.)
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To: MrEdd

I miss that show. We need more like that nowadays.


13 posted on 08/17/2006 10:57:20 AM PDT by IM2MAD
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To: Froufrou

I remember a similar story from Catholic grade school. The teacher said a student turned in a drawing of four people in a plane. She asked what it was and the kid said "That's the flight to Egypt." "Who's flying?" "Pontius Pilate."


14 posted on 08/17/2006 10:58:51 AM PDT by Larry Lucido
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To: Theresawithanh

Dang it! Now I can't remember who really did! My friend's son was learning abbreviations when he took a history test asking why it's important to vote.

He said 'because it's a free cuntry,' but he appreviated cuntry in a way that was ~ahem!~ not reprintable here. ;o) But he did get an A on the test.


15 posted on 08/17/2006 10:59:54 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou
A friend just took a job in China. Among the comments he and his wife have heard... "China. Isn't that a city in Japan?".
16 posted on 08/17/2006 11:01:18 AM PDT by Fudd
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To: Theresawithanh; Larry Lucido

We must have been very good students...see how well we remember those little mistakes?


17 posted on 08/17/2006 11:01:50 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou
Now I can't remember who really did!

Marie Currie

18 posted on 08/17/2006 11:04:21 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: Froufrou
Reminds me of a student I once taught in Jr. College in N.C. near the Va. border. Her name was "Gina" and she wanted a prestige license plate that also proclaimed her home state here in Virginia. Hence: VA-GINA. Real story...
19 posted on 08/17/2006 11:04:57 AM PDT by meandog (While Clinton isn't fit even to scrape Reagan's shoes, Bush will never fill them!)
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To: Froufrou
4. How can you delay milk turning sour? Keep it in the cow.

What's the matter with this one? It's true.

20 posted on 08/17/2006 11:04:59 AM PDT by CholeraJoe (USAF Air Rescue "That others may live.")
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To: ShadowAce

Oops. I was wrong. Alexander Fleming.


21 posted on 08/17/2006 11:05:35 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: Froufrou

Define a more'. Answer: When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amore'.


22 posted on 08/17/2006 11:08:31 AM PDT by NaughtiusMaximus (WARNING: Alcohol may cause you to think you are whispering when you are definitely not.)
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To: ShadowAce

"The serendipitous discovery of penicillin is usually attributed to Scottish scientist Alexander Fleming in 1928, though others had earlier noted the antibacterial effects of Penicillium."

Sorry, that's from wikipedia. Curie was a physicist who discovered radium and died in 1934 from aplastic anemia caused by handling the stuff.


23 posted on 08/17/2006 11:09:58 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou

When my oldest was six I once said to him, "Well that is your opinion you know."

His response was "I'm not a pinion, I'm a pumpkin."


24 posted on 08/17/2006 11:10:31 AM PDT by CougarGA7 (There are no trophies for winning wars. Only consequences for losing them.)
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To: meandog

And the football team in Neiderwald are the Nads...Go! Nads! Go! Nads!


25 posted on 08/17/2006 11:11:10 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: CougarGA7

Did he know that a pinon is a pine nut?


26 posted on 08/17/2006 11:11:56 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou
..Curie was a physicist who discovered radium...

I know. I've got a weird wire crossed in my brain. I keep confusing those two. I have no idea why.

27 posted on 08/17/2006 11:14:13 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: Froufrou
A friend of mine is a history professor at a community college. She has collected many hysterical exam answers over the years, but this is my asbsolute favorite:

Q. What was the immediate cause of the First World War?

A. They killed the Archduck of Austria.

28 posted on 08/17/2006 11:15:56 AM PDT by blau993
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To: Froufrou
"Wow, IIRC CA used to be among the best! Back in the late 70s..."

One of the best lies to traverse the US.
Right up there with, never discuss politics, religion or sex .. Where, I ask .. do we have most problems in America.

29 posted on 08/17/2006 11:18:42 AM PDT by knarf (Someone stole my tagline !! It was here a minute ago .. /8^( ...)
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To: blau993

That's good, but here are some of mine:

"He needed to lose weight. He had a 38-inch waste in his pants."

"Sex is not for pleasure. It is for recreation."


30 posted on 08/17/2006 11:18:59 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: knarf

knarf, nice name! Pinky and the Brain fan?


31 posted on 08/17/2006 11:19:55 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: ShadowAce

You glow in the dark after you take penicillin? <:o(


32 posted on 08/17/2006 11:21:11 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou
You glow in the dark after you take penicillin?

Of course! That must be it! LOL!

33 posted on 08/17/2006 11:22:13 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32
I'd be real interested to know the ages of these students..

Esp. being able to spell condominium.

34 posted on 08/17/2006 11:23:35 AM PDT by Vinnie
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To: Froufrou
No .. just my 'quick and original' thinking when I was asked for a screen name upon signing up for FreeRepublic .. a lifetime ago.

I've never seen Pinky and the Brain, nor Spongebobsquarepants, nor more than two or three episodes of Freinds, Seinfeld .. and a bunch of et cetera's.

frank

35 posted on 08/17/2006 11:24:26 AM PDT by knarf (Someone stole my tagline !! It was here a minute ago .. /8^( ...)
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To: Vinnie

maybe they lukt it up in a skool dikshunari..


36 posted on 08/17/2006 11:30:32 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32 (I'm a Patriot Guard Rider..www.patriotguard.org for info)
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To: patton

cute :)


37 posted on 08/17/2006 12:04:15 PM PDT by leda (Life is always what you make it!)
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To: Froufrou

yes. We love them.


38 posted on 08/17/2006 12:05:00 PM PDT by CougarGA7 (There are no trophies for winning wars. Only consequences for losing them.)
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To: blau993

I ran a test with a question worded much like that, and got the following answer:

"Someone shot at someone else - and the target resented it."


39 posted on 08/17/2006 12:07:57 PM PDT by Fatuncle (Of course I'm ignorant. I'm here to learn.)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32; All

These are taken off the SAT in California right?


40 posted on 08/17/2006 12:08:36 PM PDT by Rhadaghast (Yeshua haMashiach hu Adonai Tsidkenu)
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To: hsalaw

Ya bet me to it.


41 posted on 08/17/2006 12:09:05 PM PDT by Rhadaghast (Yeshua haMashiach hu Adonai Tsidkenu)
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To: NaughtiusMaximus
Define a more'. Answer: When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amore'.

A New Zealander man with an all over tan, that's a Maori.

(Originally by Spider Robinson)
42 posted on 08/17/2006 12:21:49 PM PDT by Gorjus
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To: Froufrou
Actually these probably came from some very bright kids. They sound very freeperish:')
43 posted on 08/17/2006 9:10:05 PM PDT by CindyDawg
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

Probably college grad students.


44 posted on 08/17/2006 9:13:27 PM PDT by Fledermaus (Iran must be dealt with now! Faster please.)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

college freshmen??


45 posted on 08/17/2006 9:15:53 PM PDT by cajun-jack
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