Dear Mr. Hussein,
We appreciate your business with our most merciful bank. Unfortunately, we will require two forms of i.d. and the maiden name of your mother. Would you like to participate in our identity secure system? For only $4.99 a month we will notify by email or camel if any entity attempts to maliciously acquire your funds or access your account.
Warmest regards to you and Allah
Governor of the Bank of Iraq.
lol, you guys are killing me!