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51% of Women Are Now Living Without Spouse
New York Times ^ | 16 January 2007 | Sam Roberts

Posted on 01/16/2007 10:04:04 AM PST by shrinkermd

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To: Mr. Jeeves

You wrote:

"I'm sure your men can bench-press Volkswagens, but in this game they will lose every time to the guy with smaller muscles and more self-confidence."


That directly insulted my men without you having any clue what you're talking about. That gets me incensed. Damn right.


In fact, it might surprise you to know that I am much more a shy person than "self-confident" - primarily thanks to "self-confident" "good-looking" peers in elementary school and so on who like to mercilessly beat on people who aren't "cute". I am definitely not any "control freak" (although there are certain things where I could be said to be so). Again, you know nothing about me, or my men.


441 posted on 01/17/2007 3:14:56 PM PST by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: All

PER ANOTHER FR THREAD

Turns out the NYT reporter counted ALL females from 15 on up.


How many 15 year olds are married in the USA?


442 posted on 01/17/2007 3:27:38 PM PST by longtermmemmory (VOTE! http://www.senate.gov and http://www.house.gov)
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To: Scotswife
The hatred expressed towards women by freepers on thread after thread is downright frightening

I'll assume that getting into discussions of serial-killer techniques would bother you too much?

443 posted on 01/17/2007 3:39:55 PM PST by SauronOfMordor (Never try to teach a pig to sing -- it wastes your time and it annoys the pig)
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To: Syncro

Poor Michelle...LOL!!!


444 posted on 01/17/2007 4:24:49 PM PST by antivenom (If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much damn space!)
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To: the OlLine Rebel; Mr. Jeeves
re: shyness

Shyness certainly doesn't mean weakness. A shy man can be (and often are) very strong in their own way.

The issue here is more about sex appeal. That is, a shy guy will be diminished in sexual stature by a more engaging man. This is really only true in the courtship phase: if a woman meets several men and one is shy and one is engaging, more likely than not the engaging guy is going to talk her up, make her laugh, and then ask her out. The shy guy doesn't get out of the starting gate. Of course the shy guy is rejected: he is barely in the running.

This need not have much to do with weakness, thought it certainly could. The thing is that a shy person is unable to make their case, or at least is severely handicapped when it comes to making their case.

I don't blame women for generally passing these guys by. It takes no great courage to walk up to a woman and say hi and chat her up. Women know that. A guy who is scared of women has no sex appeal. Women admire men who see what they want and go for it. They don't want a boor, but a man who is afraid of saying hello to a woman is just unimpressive to most women, on balance.
445 posted on 01/17/2007 6:45:29 PM PST by HitmanLV (Rock, Rock, Rock and Rollergames! Rockin' & Rolling, Rockin' with Rollergames!)
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To: Melas; JamesP81
Church, bars, it's all good. A fella can meet an attractive woman anywhere. Most of the challenge is just walking up and saying hello (and honestly, that's nowhere near the challenge many folks seem to make it out to be).

What's the worst that can happen? ;-)
446 posted on 01/17/2007 6:49:26 PM PST by HitmanLV (Rock, Rock, Rock and Rollergames! Rockin' & Rolling, Rockin' with Rollergames!)
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To: Titan Magroyne
I've never wanted a "project." I don't understand the women who do. I just a want a guy to respect & love me the same as I do him. If that doesn't happen, well ... I've seen worse than being single, LOL!

You think wisely, Titan. Good luck to you. :-)

447 posted on 01/17/2007 6:52:50 PM PST by Victoria Delsoul
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To: gawatchman
I was just commenting on the disrespectful attitude I see many women exhibiting toward men. He can only do the guy things if and when she approves.

There is a whole industry (books, magazines, tv, radio, etc) and peer support network among women that constantly reinforces the concept that women's needs and wants are to be honored and indulged, but men's needs and wants are to be derided and dismissed.

It's incumbent on men - on a micro, not macro level - to firmly combat that mindset. Most appear not to. A shame. Sucks to be them.

448 posted on 01/17/2007 6:55:06 PM PST by HitmanLV (Rock, Rock, Rock and Rollergames! Rockin' & Rolling, Rockin' with Rollergames!)
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To: JamesP81

Forget eharmony. If you answer the test with a solid set of values, you would be considered dangerous, a threat, maybe even a psycho criminal. I took the test a second time (using another e-mail address), spoofing as a spineless sensitive liberal Harvey Milquetoast. Passed with flying colors. According to that test, it tells me that according to eharmony.com's assessment women want doormats.


449 posted on 01/17/2007 7:09:25 PM PST by Fred Hayek (Liberalism is a mental disorder)
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To: HitmanLV

OTOH, some of us view a total stranger just waltzing in as intrusive and pushy and full of himself - even at a "meat market" (some of us actually want to dance more than anything). I know, it depends on the situation exactly, including his facade (real or fake).

Now, a more normal situation would be like at work. If you sort of get to know someone there over time, it might be aggravating if the "shy guy" doesn't "come on" to you. This would be a situation where the more confident guy has the advantage. Of course, the shy guy here also has the advantage that he has gotten to know you, and is not as likely to be afraid and might "get around to it". Not like a "total stranger" thing at all, on either side.


450 posted on 01/17/2007 7:24:45 PM PST by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: JamesP81

It doesn't have to be eHarmony. Just use a regular "dumb" service and check things out yourself. And give yourself a good description.

Match.com worked for me (eHarmony, BTW, was at the time extremely vexing as far as user-friendliness and just plain stupid hyperlinking). My husband - shy as he is ;-) - e-mailed me through it and well, here we are. And we lived 5 min from each other for 15 years. You see, just winging it through "real life" just doesn't net you all the possibilities.


451 posted on 01/17/2007 7:29:22 PM PST by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: Victoria Delsoul

Thanks. This has been an interesting thread, to say the least! :o)


452 posted on 01/17/2007 7:42:04 PM PST by Titan Magroyne ("Y'know, I've always thought of politics as show business for ugly people." Jay Leno:Al Gore 11/29)
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To: Titan Magroyne

LOL.


453 posted on 01/17/2007 7:43:46 PM PST by Victoria Delsoul
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To: antivenom

To each their own


454 posted on 01/17/2007 8:58:05 PM PST by Syncro
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To: Hildy
Many of these middle-aged women with no career skills. Why should they give up their standard of living?

Nobody's saying they should give up their standard of living...they're just saying it shouldn't come out of the ex's hide. Everyone should enjoy the standard of living they can support.

455 posted on 01/17/2007 9:14:28 PM PST by gogeo (Irony is not one of Islam's core competencies (thx Pharmboy))
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To: gogeo

If a husband leaves a wife and family for a younger model, it should come out of his hide. Sorry.


456 posted on 01/17/2007 9:22:14 PM PST by Hildy (Words are mere bubbles of water...but deeds are drops of gold.)
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To: the OlLine Rebel

I think women tend toward the social aspect of church more.


457 posted on 01/17/2007 9:23:55 PM PST by gogeo (Irony is not one of Islam's core competencies (thx Pharmboy))
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To: petitfour
Your post reminds me of a several folks I know. One stay-at-home college graduate delivered her second child and within months her husband was busy keeping himself happy with an employee...

Now...that's not your friend...that's the plot from that movie City Slickers ;-)

458 posted on 01/17/2007 9:27:44 PM PST by gogeo (Irony is not one of Islam's core competencies (thx Pharmboy))
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To: IslandJeff
Turns out, the study included all women over 15 years old, not 18 or 20...

As I recall, there was a statistic about the number of "kids" killed with guns. That story included "kids" up to age 25.

The left is pretty flexible about definitions, aren't they? Any statistic offered by a leftie should be met with skepticism bordering on cynicism.

459 posted on 01/17/2007 9:31:46 PM PST by gogeo (Irony is not one of Islam's core competencies (thx Pharmboy))
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To: IslandJeff

Some gals like it when you hold the door, some don't. You can't generalize.


460 posted on 01/17/2007 9:41:27 PM PST by gogeo (Irony is not one of Islam's core competencies (thx Pharmboy))
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