Posted on 01/23/2007 9:43:34 AM PST by null and void

TOM Cruise is the new Christ of Scientology, according to leaders of the cult-like religion.
The Mission: Impossible star has been told he has been chosen to spread the word of his faith throughout the world.
And leader David Miscavige believes that in future, Cruise, 44, will be worshipped like Jesus for his work to raise awareness of the religion.
A source close to the actor, who has risen to one of the churchs top levels, said: Tom has been told he is Scientologys Christ-like figure.
Like Christ, hes been criticised for his views. But future generations will realise he was right.
Cruise joined the Church of Scientology in the 80s. Leader L Ron Hubbard claimed humans bear traces of an ancient alien civilisation.
Disgusting!!!!
I guess I have to say it again: God invented Scientologists so Jehovah's Witnesses would have someone to laugh at."
...at least until some fool with more money comes along.
Yeah. Right. *snrk*
Don't be taking my name in vain, null and void...
Crucify! Crucify!
Can't wait until Matt Lauer interviews him about that!
Soon to be starring in "The Last Temptation of Tom."
ES get in here ROFL
The nutjobs of Hollywood. If this is what having alot of money does to your brain, I will remain a humble pauper.

I'm thinking not.
Nail, meet hammer.
Well said.
Cruise-ify?
ROTFL
Being the Christ of Scientology, isn't that like being the best hockey player in Nicaragua?
So he's a legend in his own mind, huh?
I am the Anticruise.
How dare those whacko compare him to our Savior? That is outright blashphemy.
LOL!
That's snrk not Snark...
Rhymes with irk, not ark....
Yeah, and scientology is anti-gay. (At least Hubbard was. Very)
Tom Cruise may well be the Messiah.... But this is the test - -flog him to within an inch of his life and then hang him on a cross until his lungs collapse and he is very dead (pierce his lungs with a spear so we know his lungs have filled up with water - scientifically prove he is dead beyond a shadow of a doubt), then bury him in a cave sealed with a huge boulder cutting off the air supply, just in case, and armed guards to do away with any monkey business from his followers... Then if he comes back from the dead, says he is the messiah, ascends on a cloud into heaven in front of 300 amazed people who then spread through the world and multiply to form a new religion that ultimately becomes the underpinning philosophy of the majority of the civilised world for centuries, well, give him the gold BluePeter messiah badge.... -- LongDistanceRunner, US
I'd be willing to bet Lisa McPherson would vehemently challenge that if she could
I haven't a clue who a scientologist would call out to from the Cross.
"Please turn to today's reading...located on page 142 of your Cruise missal."
Excellent!
I'll turn Cruise in to the local mental health department for thirty pieces of silver. Kissing him on the cheek will cost a lot more.
Cruise joined the Church of Scientology in the 80s. Leader L Ron Hubbard claimed humans bear traces of an ancient alien civilisation.
Wow. Talk about understating all that is nutty in Sciencefictiontology.
*ouch* LOL

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Never.
Over my dead body, in fact.
!!!Viva Cristo Rey!!!!
Big time
So let's nail him up, let him die, bury him, and see if he comes back alive in a few days.
Cruisify Him!
Yeah! Who do they think they are? The Beatles???
Scientologists appear to be masters of Cruise control.
The nice thing is that we won't start riots and demand people lose their jobs or be beheaded for saying it.
OMG!!! Hilarious!! (well, sort of...) :)
L Ron put out a more goofy far out creation story than any I have heard so far. A Scientologists brain would have to be in the pounded into jam stage before they would believe any of it.
It must be that by the time they are initiated into the so called inner mysteries, crock of crap tho they are, they have spent too much time and money and are so indoctrinated and incriminated that they cannot quit.
"So let's nail him up, let him die, bury him, and see if he comes back alive in a few days."
Mission Impossible IV????
LOL
Does "wtf?" count as a question?
That's snrk not Snark...Rhymes with irk, not ark....
I guess I had vowel envy...never mind...
ping
Seriously, I personally knew some members of the "Ron is God" club.
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