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Man wins divorce from wife 'too shy' to sleep with him
Taipei Times ^ | Monday, Feb 12, 2007 | DPA, TAIPEI

Posted on 02/13/2007 10:43:22 AM PST by DogByte6RER

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Hmmmm...

I think I can hear Rodney Dangerfield tight now.

1 posted on 02/13/2007 10:43:30 AM PST by DogByte6RER
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To: DogByte6RER
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting "Take my wife, please!"
2 posted on 02/13/2007 10:44:22 AM PST by DogByte6RER ("Loose lips sink ships")
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To: DogByte6RER

Dude, that's Henny Youngman you hear.


3 posted on 02/13/2007 10:45:50 AM PST by Huck (Soylent Green is People.)
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To: DogByte6RER

"My wife cut me down to one time a month. I guess I shouldn't feel so bad because she cut off the other two guys completely."


4 posted on 02/13/2007 10:46:14 AM PST by dfwgator (The University of Florida - Championship U)
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To: DogByte6RER; mikrofon; martin_fierro; dighton; dead; Tijeras_Slim; Xenalyte

Maybe he was being too demanding. Probably a Taipei personality.


5 posted on 02/13/2007 10:47:41 AM PST by Charles Henrickson (Pacific Rimshot.)
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To: DogByte6RER
Lin must compensate Chen NT$300,000 = US$ 9,070.
6 posted on 02/13/2007 10:47:48 AM PST by KarlInOhio (Samoans: The (low) wage slaves in the Pelosi-Starkist complex.)
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To: dfwgator

"I got in a cab the other night. I asked the driver to take some place where I could get some action. He took me to my house!"


7 posted on 02/13/2007 10:47:59 AM PST by RexBeach
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To: DogByte6RER

I cannot make a final determination until I see what this guy looks like.... LOL!


8 posted on 02/13/2007 10:49:39 AM PST by BossLady ("People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own soul" - Carl Jung)
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To: dfwgator

These days I'm satisfied if I can get into a tight parking space.


9 posted on 02/13/2007 10:49:51 AM PST by babble-on
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To: dfwgator

With my dog I don't get no respect. He keeps barking at the front door. He don't want to go out. He wants me to leave.

What a dog I got. His favorite bone is in my arm!

Last week I saw my psychiatrist. I told him, "Doc, I keep thinking I'm a dog." He told me to get off his couch.

I worked in a pet store and people kept asking how big I'd get.

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

I'll tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless!

One night I came home. I figured, let my wife come on. I'll play it cool. Let her make the first move. She went to Florida.

I asked my old man if I could go ice-skating on the lake. He told me, "Wait til it gets warmer."


10 posted on 02/13/2007 10:50:55 AM PST by InvisibleChurch (Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.)
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To: RexBeach

Bump for later read.


11 posted on 02/13/2007 10:52:23 AM PST by albee (The best thing you can do for the poor is.....not be one of them. - Eric Hoffer)
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To: InvisibleChurch

"My mother didn't breast feed me, she told me that she liked me as a friend."

"I figured I would walk my dog to pick up girls. Turns out my dog was using me to pick up other dogs."


12 posted on 02/13/2007 10:53:12 AM PST by dfwgator (The University of Florida - Championship U)
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To: DogByte6RER
On the wedding night, Lin slept fully dressed and wrapped with a quilt, the daily said, without citing any sources.

Chen, better check "her" hardware there.

13 posted on 02/13/2007 10:54:29 AM PST by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: dfwgator

Just before he died I remember him saying as he was admitted to the hospital, "If things go well, I'll be out in two weeks, if they don't, I'll be out in two hours."


14 posted on 02/13/2007 10:54:39 AM PST by Sax
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To: Charles Henrickson

LOL

Maybe this guy should rent "The Crying Game."


15 posted on 02/13/2007 10:55:26 AM PST by william clark (DH4WH - Ecclesiastes 10:2)
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To: DogByte6RER

You mean this isn't normal....?


16 posted on 02/13/2007 10:55:55 AM PST by gracesdad
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To: RexBeach

I come home from work and there's a guy running naked in front of my house. I asked, why are you running naked in front of my house? He said, because you came home early!


17 posted on 02/13/2007 10:56:41 AM PST by Moonman62 (The issue of whether cheap labor makes America great should have been settled by the Civil War.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I hate myself for laughing at that, and you should be ashamed.


18 posted on 02/13/2007 10:57:15 AM PST by tcostell (MOLON LABE)
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To: Charles Henrickson
On the wedding night, Lin slept fully dressed and wrapped with a quilt, the daily said, without citing any sources.

All night, or just formosa the night?

19 posted on 02/13/2007 10:57:46 AM PST by Tijeras_Slim
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To: DogByte6RER

I think someone should have explained to her what "consummate" meant before she signed the contract. *chuckle*


20 posted on 02/13/2007 11:01:06 AM PST by LaineyDee (Don't mess with Texas wimmen!)
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To: DogByte6RER

"When Chen tried to sleep with her, the report said, she pushed him away shouting: "You are ridiculous!"

LOL!


21 posted on 02/13/2007 11:01:14 AM PST by No Blue States
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To: Moonman62

God, I miss Rodney. He was the king of the one-liners. What a funny guy he was.


22 posted on 02/13/2007 11:01:20 AM PST by reagan_fanatic (Every time a jihadist dies, an angel gets its wings.)
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To: DogByte6RER
With me, food has replaced sex.

I installed a mirror above my dining room table.

The other day my kid walked in on me. I had to cover my main dish.

23 posted on 02/13/2007 11:04:03 AM PST by Moonman62 (The issue of whether cheap labor makes America great should have been settled by the Civil War.)
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It could have been worse.. Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
24 posted on 02/13/2007 11:04:10 AM PST by No Blue States
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To: DogByte6RER
Dude, you got a wrong comedian!

"Take my wife, pleeeze!"

25 posted on 02/13/2007 11:04:25 AM PST by Revolting cat! (We all need someone we can bleed on...)
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To: Froufrou

This thread has some serious joke potential.


26 posted on 02/13/2007 11:07:16 AM PST by JamesP81 (Eph 6:12)
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To: Moonman62

"With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me."


27 posted on 02/13/2007 11:08:33 AM PST by eyedigress
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To: DogByte6RER
When Chen tried to sleep with her, the report said, she pushed him away shouting: "You are ridiculous!"

Funny but at the same time, not funny. Poor SOB.
28 posted on 02/13/2007 11:09:00 AM PST by HEY4QDEMS (Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.)
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To: DogByte6RER

I take it he didn't test drive the car before he bought it.


29 posted on 02/13/2007 11:11:24 AM PST by CzarNicky (The problem with bad ideas is that they seemed like good ideas at the time.)
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To: No Blue States; Charles Henrickson; martin_fierro

Maybe she actually said he was "really dickless"...


30 posted on 02/13/2007 11:12:09 AM PST by mikrofon (Time to Taiwan Ahn)
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To: reagan_fanatic

"I know my wife cheats on me....I bought a used car and found her dress in the back seat!"

"And kids these days! They get pregnant from eating chicken. It's finger-licking good and one thing leads to another!"


31 posted on 02/13/2007 11:12:13 AM PST by fredhead (Teach a man to fish.......and he'll fish for a lifetime.)
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To: DogByte6RER
It wasnt because "she" was shy. He just has the wrong equipment.
32 posted on 02/13/2007 11:12:29 AM PST by DogBarkTree (The United States failure to act against Iran will be seen as weakness throughout the Muslim world.)
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To: mikrofon

"she refused to consummate the marriage on the wedding night because she was too tired "

Hey, ive heard that one a lot too.


33 posted on 02/13/2007 11:16:05 AM PST by No Blue States
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To: mikrofon

Yes sir, it's true: this man has no dick.


34 posted on 02/13/2007 11:16:23 AM PST by VRWCmember (Everyone is entitled to my opinion.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

giggle


35 posted on 02/13/2007 11:23:26 AM PST by Lorianne
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To: RexBeach

I heard about a man that rented a motel room and made a call to an escort service. His wife seemed to have a permanent headache and didn't want him to bother her in bed.


He was very shocked when she knocked on his door.


36 posted on 02/13/2007 11:24:04 AM PST by seemoAR (Absolute power corrupts absolutely)
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To: DogByte6RER
"The first time I had $ex, it scared me to death! I was all by myself!"

Thanks, Rodney, you were great...

37 posted on 02/13/2007 11:27:34 AM PST by Chinito (6990th Security Group, RC-135/Combat Apple, SEA Class of '68)
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To: DogByte6RER
He should have just got a lap pillow instead. Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
38 posted on 02/13/2007 11:27:47 AM PST by No Blue States
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To: JamesP81; presidio9; Millee; Shimmer128

I'm thinking Chen has very small feet and drives a very big car.

Trashy Tuesday ping!


39 posted on 02/13/2007 11:29:52 AM PST by Froufrou
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To: Moonman62

"There's only one thing wrong with my wife's face - it shows!"


40 posted on 02/13/2007 11:30:14 AM PST by RexBeach
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To: william clark

I agree. Methinks someone needs a chromosome test.


41 posted on 02/13/2007 11:32:06 AM PST by Cyman
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She'a Man baby


42 posted on 02/13/2007 11:32:57 AM PST by freeplancer
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To: Charles Henrickson

Good excuse for the guy to hit the local pub and Taiwan on.


43 posted on 02/13/2007 11:39:16 AM PST by TruthShallSetYouFree (Abortion is to family planning what bankruptcy is to financial planning.)
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To: LaineyDee
I think someone should have explained to her what "consummate" meant before she signed the contract.

She thought it had something to do with soup.

44 posted on 02/13/2007 11:40:41 AM PST by TruthShallSetYouFree (Abortion is to family planning what bankruptcy is to financial planning.)
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To: DogByte6RER

I think that was Henny Youngman.


45 posted on 02/13/2007 11:42:32 AM PST by Bob J (RIGHTALK.com...a conservative alternative to NPR!)
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To: DogByte6RER
When Chen tried to sleep with her, the report said, she pushed him away shouting: "You are ridiculous!"

That's when you get up the next morning to have the marriage annulled.

46 posted on 02/13/2007 11:43:10 AM PST by Centurion2000 (If you're not being shot at, it's not a high stress job.)
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To: DogBarkTree

That's a sturdy woman !


47 posted on 02/13/2007 11:43:51 AM PST by CORedneck
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To: TruthShallSetYouFree

I thought she might have misunderstood it to mean "salad dressing". *chuckle*


48 posted on 02/13/2007 11:48:11 AM PST by LaineyDee (Don't mess with Texas wimmen!)
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To: DogByte6RER

Dude shoulda tried gettin' her all liquored up.


49 posted on 02/13/2007 11:52:48 AM PST by rogue yam
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To: rogue yam

Marriage seems to end a great sexual relationship.


50 posted on 02/13/2007 11:58:35 AM PST by TYVets (God so loved the world he didn't send a committee)
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