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Inmate Set for Death Plans Joke as Final Words
Fox News ^ | June 25, 2007 | Associated Press

Posted on 06/25/2007 2:28:31 PM PDT by Hazwaste

Condemned inmate Patrick Knight is ready to die, and die laughing.

Knight, 39, convicted of the fatal shooting of his neighbors almost 16 years ago outside Amarillo, has been considering dozens of jokes he's been receiving in recent weeks since drawing attention for his desire to tell a joke as part of his final statement from the Texas death chamber gurney.

He's scheduled for lethal injection Tuesday evening in Huntsville.

(Excerpt) Read more at foxnews.com ...


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: deathrow; inmatejoke
This animal killed his neighbors execution style, and wants to tell a joke as his last statement prior to his own execution. The AP is enabling him by publishing his story.

What a world.

1 posted on 06/25/2007 2:28:33 PM PDT by Hazwaste
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To: Hazwaste

Right before he states the punchilne they should pull the plug and yell “Joke’s on you!”


2 posted on 06/25/2007 2:29:59 PM PDT by Borges
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To: Hazwaste

I nominate: “Take my life—please!”


3 posted on 06/25/2007 2:30:42 PM PDT by TruthShallSetYouFree (Abortion is to family planning what bankruptcy is to financial planning.)
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To: Hazwaste

Always leave ‘em wanting more.......


4 posted on 06/25/2007 2:32:25 PM PDT by Red Badger (Bite your tongue. It tastes a lot better than crow................)
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Comment #5 Removed by Moderator

To: TruthShallSetYouFree

“Two guards and a convict walked into the Death Chamber........


6 posted on 06/25/2007 2:33:17 PM PDT by Red Badger (Bite your tongue. It tastes a lot better than crow................)
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To: Hazwaste

“I’d rather be in Philadelphia”


7 posted on 06/25/2007 2:34:16 PM PDT by Republican Red (The word "courage" is not in the liberal vocabulary)
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To: Hazwaste

Is he going to flash his tie and run his fingers through his hair like Letterman does afterwards?


8 posted on 06/25/2007 2:34:32 PM PDT by Extremely Extreme Extremist
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To: TruthShallSetYouFree

I should not laugh. I am, but I should not.


9 posted on 06/25/2007 2:36:15 PM PDT by Frank_Discussion (May the wings of Liberty never lose a feather!)
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To: Hazwaste; mikrofon; Charles Henrickson; aculeus; dighton; Thinkin' Gal

Dying is easy.

Comedy is hard.


10 posted on 06/25/2007 2:36:37 PM PDT by martin_fierro (Try the veal.)
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To: Hazwaste
Wow! Tough Crowd!
11 posted on 06/25/2007 2:39:20 PM PDT by SmithL (si vis pacem, para bellum)
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To: TruthShallSetYouFree

hee hee hee....

good one


12 posted on 06/25/2007 2:39:42 PM PDT by Mr. K (Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help)
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To: Hazwaste
Three women are about to be executed for crimes. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blonde.

Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

Suddenly the brunette yells, "Earthquake!!" Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape.

The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

The redhead then screams, "Tornado!!" Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.

By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She also says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

The blonde shouts, "Fire!!"
13 posted on 06/25/2007 2:40:07 PM PDT by HaveHadEnough
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To: All

Reports of my demise have been greatly....ARRRGH!


14 posted on 06/25/2007 2:40:37 PM PDT by Hazwaste (Now with added lemony freshness!)
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To: HaveHadEnough

You win.


15 posted on 06/25/2007 2:41:13 PM PDT by Hazwaste (Now with added lemony freshness!)
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To: Hazwaste

“A murderer, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a death chamber...”


16 posted on 06/25/2007 2:44:17 PM PDT by reagan_fanatic (..and the horse you rode in on!)
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To: Hazwaste

I hope this POS is alive long enough to hear the boos and jeers.


17 posted on 06/25/2007 2:46:44 PM PDT by dforest (Fighting the new liberal Conservatism. The Left foot in the GOP door.)
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To: Hazwaste

That will be his LAST laugh.


18 posted on 06/25/2007 2:48:23 PM PDT by no dems (Ted Kennedy's car has killed more people than my gun.)
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To: martin_fierro

Yep, that’s comedy, either you kill, or you die...


19 posted on 06/25/2007 2:48:51 PM PDT by hunter112 (Change will happen when very good men are forced to do very bad things.)
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To: Republican Red

Hey, I’m dying to tell this one...


20 posted on 06/25/2007 2:49:03 PM PDT by skimbell
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To: reagan_fanatic

“A murderer, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a death chamber...”

Congress?


21 posted on 06/25/2007 2:57:45 PM PDT by picard (The Sphinx and Pyramids are an abomination to Allah! They must be destroyed!)
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To: Hazwaste

I got a joke for this terrible waste of skin.

Knock,knock.
Who's there?
Dead man walking.

Ha!

22 posted on 06/25/2007 2:58:49 PM PDT by mdittmar (May God watch over those who serve,and have served,to keep us free)
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To: Hazwaste

Cut his tongue out and feed it to him. Then let him tell his funny little joke.


23 posted on 06/25/2007 3:01:54 PM PDT by TDA2
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To: Hazwaste

When that murderer stands before God, it won’t be a joke.


24 posted on 06/25/2007 3:42:45 PM PDT by TexasRepublic (Afghan protest - "Death to Dog Washers!")
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To: Hazwaste
Gosh, he wants to tell a joke, see? Even cold blooded, ultiple murderers have redeeming qualities (gag), we should release him and not add to our crime of allowing Tootsie or whatever to die.

If we insensitive Neanderthals allow another killer to be killed, our punishment will be....a bad joke, exacerbated millions of times by media repetition. Adding insult to injury. And adding, and adding, and adding...

25 posted on 06/25/2007 4:01:17 PM PDT by cake_crumb (May I never live to see the day America has a 'popular war'. God bless our troops.)
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To: SmithL
Wow! Tough Crowd!

LOL!

26 posted on 06/25/2007 4:03:34 PM PDT by OHelix
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To: Hazwaste

Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!


27 posted on 06/25/2007 4:11:19 PM PDT by Loyalist (Social justice isn't; social studies aren't; social work doesn't.)
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To: Loyalist
Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!

I don't get it.

Of course, I don't speak German, either.
28 posted on 06/25/2007 5:15:13 PM PDT by fr_freak
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To: martin_fierro; Hazwaste; mikrofon; Charles Henrickson; dighton; Thinkin' Gal

Handpick the witnesses/audience for the joke.

Let him tell the joke.

When he wonders why no one laughed explain: “We imported them from Russia yesterday. They don’t understand English.”

Then insert needle.


29 posted on 06/25/2007 6:59:04 PM PDT by aculeus
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To: Hazwaste
This is really really sad. I don’t understand his desire for jokes. I think I believe him when he says he doesn’t remember all of it clearly. But I don’t understand him wanting to turn this into a comedy routine.
30 posted on 06/25/2007 7:07:22 PM PDT by mamelukesabre
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To: Borges

That’s EXACTLY what my hubby said.....GREAT IDEA!!!


31 posted on 06/25/2007 7:09:18 PM PDT by NordP (The greatest gift God can give us is LIFE. The greatest gift man can give to another is FREEDOM.)
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