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Dad, What's Unabhängigkeitstag?
VANITY | July 4, 2007 | Nathanbedford

Posted on 07/04/2007 4:11:23 AM PDT by nathanbedford

A few years ago I published this vanity and many FReepers were kind enough to express appreciation so I have grown a tradition of my own by posting it every Fourth of July

DAD, WHAT's UNABHAENGIGKEITSTAG?

"Is that when the thirteen colonies broke away from England?" My ten year inquired out of nowhere at 6 AM German time this morning.

"Yeah, why do you want to know, eat your breakfast," I mumbled, too sleepy to be very curious. "Because I am afraid my teacher will ask me, since I am wearing this T-shirt and I'm the only American in the class." With an effort, I adjusted my gaze upward to his white T-shirt. It was brand new. Prominent on his breast was an image of the flag and below that:

OLD NAVY

FREEDOM 2005 TRADITION

Waking up now, I reflected that if the Old Navy company could so shamelessly trade on the image of the flag, it ought in decency at least amend the line below to:

FREEDOM 2005 COMMERCE

But then I thought, what could be more traditional in America than commercializing the flag?

"Waddayamean, you're the only American in class, what's that got to do with the Fourth of July?" My paternal antannae were also coming to life. I remembered that the kids had sometimes returned from Gymnasium, German high school, and recited seemingly off-hand remarks from professors disparaging America and especially George Bush. Some of the hearsay reports had been pretty rough, describing America as killing Iraqis or causing global warming and the like.

"I think he will call on me to explain the Declaration of Indepencence to the whole class," masking his apprehension.

"So, what will you tell them?"

"That is how we got free of England," he replied, in German. "That's right, as far as it goes. Never mind breakfast, lets get to the computer, it time to search FreeRepublic." A few minutes later we had a copy of the declaration printed out, with the font changed to italics for psuedo verisimilitude to the venerable document. "There are actually a couple of ideas in here that are more important than announcing our break with England," I said, highlighting with a yellow marker this passage:

that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights

And this passage too:

Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed

"This means that who you are, what rights you have, come directly from God and not from the government. In fact, the government is there to serve you, as a child of God, not the other way around, and when the government takes away your rights, the government is not legitimate, and you can change it."

"What's legitimate?" Ah, " berechtigt," I answered. I must have gotten it right for he seemed satisfied with the translation and his Deutsch is better than mine. Handing him the printout, I said, "take this with you, read it on the bus, and when you get to class you tell them these ideas are America's gift to the world. A lot of people in Europe think your rights come from the government, not the other way around. No one had ever done this 'for real' before. Look what it says here just before where they signed it, it means they knew they were risking their lives:"

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor

"OK, dad, see ya."

An hour later, his mother asked me, "Did you give him a printout of the Declaration of Independence?" "Yup," I proudly responded.

She laughed, "He said, 'Dad really expects me to read this on the schoolbus'"



TOPICS: Constitution/Conservatism; Foreign Affairs; Government; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS:
Happy Independence Day everyone!


1 posted on 07/04/2007 4:11:24 AM PDT by nathanbedford
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To: nathanbedford
Und einen Glücklichen Unabhängigkeitstag zu Ihnen!

And a happy Independence Day to you!

2 posted on 07/04/2007 4:16:37 AM PDT by mainepatsfan
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To: nathanbedford

It’s good to have guys like you and your family in germany.


3 posted on 07/04/2007 4:18:21 AM PDT by Rummenigge (there's people willing to blow out the light because it casts a shadow)
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To: mainepatsfan

Ich habe einen Hund. Er heist Optimus Prime.


4 posted on 07/04/2007 4:19:25 AM PDT by SoldierMedic (Rowan Walter, 23 Feb 2007)
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To: mainepatsfan

Und auf ihre Familie auch.


5 posted on 07/04/2007 4:21:43 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: nathanbedford

Danke.


6 posted on 07/04/2007 4:24:35 AM PDT by mainepatsfan
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To: nathanbedford

Sagenhaft!

Wunscht, dass mein Deutsch besser war, obwohl.

Wir brauchen mehr Vater wie Sie in der Welt!

Have a wonderful and happy Independence Day!


7 posted on 07/04/2007 4:24:58 AM PDT by stevie_d_64 (Houston Area Texans (I've always been hated))
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To: nathanbedford

BUMP!


8 posted on 07/04/2007 4:26:12 AM PDT by browardchad
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To: SoldierMedic

Keine Katzen?


9 posted on 07/04/2007 4:26:57 AM PDT by mainepatsfan
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To: SoldierMedic
Ich habe zwei Pherde die "Slick Willie" und "Monica Lewinsky" heissen.

I imported the mare, Monica Lewinsky, from Poland. If you tap her fron legs with a crop she will get down on her knees.


10 posted on 07/04/2007 4:26:58 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: stevie_d_64

“Wir brauchen mehr Vater wie Sie in der Welt!”

We need more father than you in the world?

Wie, bitte?


11 posted on 07/04/2007 4:28:19 AM PDT by toddlintown (Six bullets and Lennon goes down. Yet not one hit Yoko. Discuss.)
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To: stevie_d_64
Sehr nett von Ihnen.


12 posted on 07/04/2007 4:29:35 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: toddlintown

I figure Steve has no umlaut on his American keyboard.


13 posted on 07/04/2007 4:33:12 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: nathanbedford

“I figure Steve has no umlaut on his American keyboard.”

I just got it. Going for more coffee.


14 posted on 07/04/2007 4:35:04 AM PDT by toddlintown (Six bullets and Lennon goes down. Yet not one hit Yoko. Discuss.)
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To: nathanbedford
I've got here some US-German history in pictures - maybe worth looking at today:


15 posted on 07/04/2007 5:09:30 AM PDT by Rummenigge (there's people willing to blow out the light because it casts a shadow)
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To: nathanbedford
Freiheit spricht viele Sprachen. Es spricht mit dem Herzen, der Meinung und der Seele. Das ist ebenso universal wie Gott, der uns schuf, um Aufschlag andere Männer aber in der Freiheit nicht zu sein, Ihm und Ihm allein zu dienen!

Glücklich am 4. Juli, Amerika!

16 posted on 07/04/2007 5:14:57 AM PDT by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives In My Heart Forever)
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To: nathanbedford
Auf Gott vertrauen wir.


17 posted on 07/04/2007 5:23:36 AM PDT by oyez (Justa' another high minded lowlife.)
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To: oyez
Genau


18 posted on 07/04/2007 5:28:16 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: nathanbedford
Wie machen Sie ein umlaut? Ich kann es nicht finden.

Oh, und ein froehlichen UNABHAENGIGKEITSTAG feur Sie.

19 posted on 07/04/2007 5:38:38 AM PDT by raybbr (You think it's bad now - wait till the anchor babies start to vote.)
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To: raybbr
Mitt umlaut wird Vater als mehrfach geschrieben.


20 posted on 07/04/2007 6:03:04 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: nathanbedford

Mitt einer deutschsprachigen Tastatur.


21 posted on 07/04/2007 6:09:22 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: toddlintown

Yeah, that stupid translation site kinda stinks...

At least it didn’t say something about massaging a member of your family...That would have been awkward...

I’d be in big heap trouble...hehehe


22 posted on 07/04/2007 6:21:41 AM PDT by stevie_d_64 (Houston Area Texans (I've always been hated))
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To: nathanbedford

Yep...

#22 speaks my Mea Culpa...

I’ll stick to english, thank you very much! hehehe

Going to de-bookmark this abomination...

http://www.freetranslation.com/


23 posted on 07/04/2007 6:24:38 AM PDT by stevie_d_64 (Houston Area Texans (I've always been hated))
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To: toddlintown

We need more father than you in the world?

That should have been:

“We need more fathers “like” you in the world.”

Oh well, back to the grill...


24 posted on 07/04/2007 6:27:45 AM PDT by stevie_d_64 (Houston Area Texans (I've always been hated))
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To: stevie_d_64

“Wir brauchen noch mehr Vatern so wie Dich au der Welt.”

Umsonst...


25 posted on 07/04/2007 6:38:50 AM PDT by patton (19yrs ... only 4,981yrs to go ;))
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To: stevie_d_64
The first time I drove in Germany, I asked my wife to find this town "umleitung" on the map.

That means "detour"

I know a fella who wrote down the street name of his hotel so he could give it to a taxi driver after a pub crawl. He wrote down "Einbahnstrasse". The taxi driver scratched his head when his betrunkener passenger handed him the paper.

That means "one way street."

No one has embarrassed himself more in a foreign language than I have. With age it gets harder. We gotta just keep on trying.

I just tell myself my execrable foreign accent is exotic. The kids would rather die than be seen in public with me.


26 posted on 07/04/2007 6:40:14 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: nathanbedford


Morgen, Nathan! It's good to see you are alive and well and tutoring your son,
even if he may not fully appreciate your efforts yet.

.

27 posted on 07/04/2007 6:51:35 AM PDT by OESY
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To: OESY
Top'o'd' Morgen to you.

Unless I miss my guess that is a painting from the Minge Romantic School of my new Heimat, Chiemsee.

Thanks for that.


28 posted on 07/04/2007 7:02:28 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: nathanbedford
I married my first wife when I was stationed in Germany. Afer we got back to America, we were driving down the expressway one day and she asked, "Why do we never get to that town, I keep seeing the sign, but we never get there?".

To wit, I asked, "What town?"

In her German accent, she said "grest ahhreah."

She had been seeing the "Rest Area" signs.

A few years later, she had joined a local women's club, and they were discussing something and she stood up in front of the entire assembly and said, "Well, if you can't join them, lick them.".
29 posted on 07/04/2007 7:03:03 AM PDT by FrankR (Fred Thompson, the cure for America's current nonsense)
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To: FrankR
My father-in -law took my 7 year old son to get haircuts. When the barber asked him how he wanted it cut, grandpa didn't have a clue so he asked his grandson to translate.

The little smart ass responded, "that will cost you two euro." He made him pay.

By God, I've got a capitalist!


30 posted on 07/04/2007 7:11:56 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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To: SoldierMedic

Ich habe zwei Hunde, sieben Katzen, einen Meerschweinen, und fünf Fische. Mein Haus ist ein Zoo.


31 posted on 07/04/2007 7:19:08 AM PDT by G8 Diplomat (Senators suck...the ones in Washington and on Ottawa's NHL team)
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To: nathanbedford
I was confident you would recognize it.

The title of the painting is Sonniger Morgen am Chiemsee, by Hans Fredrick Gude.

Here's an interesting link you may have already found: ArtRoots.com

.

32 posted on 07/04/2007 7:23:19 AM PDT by OESY
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To: FrankR

My mother once exclaimed that it seemed that all exits on the Authobahn were leading to “Ausfahrt,” obviously one hell of a big city. Of course, I had to explained to her it means “exit.”


33 posted on 07/04/2007 10:16:12 AM PDT by toddlintown (Six bullets and Lennon goes down. Yet not one hit Yoko. Discuss.)
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To: toddlintown
We had a band over there in the 60's, we called ourselves the "Pathfinders".

We scheduled a concert at a German club, and all of the posters and advertising listed us as the "Fahrtfinders.
34 posted on 07/04/2007 11:41:42 AM PDT by FrankR (Fred Thompson, the cure for America's current nonsense)
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To: patton

Yep...What you said...

My American keyboard really is an anchor...


35 posted on 07/04/2007 1:46:23 PM PDT by stevie_d_64 (Houston Area Texans (I've always been hated))
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To: nathanbedford
I imported the mare, Monica Lewinsky, from Poland. If you tap her fron legs with a crop she will get down on her knees.

Lol
36 posted on 07/07/2007 4:58:37 AM PDT by SoldierMedic (Rowan Walter, 23 Feb 2007)
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To: OESY
Thanks

I have been exploring that link.


37 posted on 07/09/2007 7:33:29 AM PDT by nathanbedford ("I like to legislate. I feel I've done a lot of good." Sen. Robert Byrd)
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