Posted on 12/03/2007 10:10:13 PM PST by blam
Sperm donor pays maintenance to lesbians
By Graham Tibbetts
Last Updated: 8:42pm GMT 03/12/2007
A sperm donor who helped a lesbian couple have two children is now being forced to pay thousands of pounds for their upbringing, he said.
Andy Bathie, 37, agreed to assist Sharon and Terri Arnold - who were united in a religious blessing ceremony - after they assured him he would have no involvement in raising the boy and girl.
Andy Bathie: Legal challenge
But after the couple split up he was tracked down by the Child Support Agency and forced to make regular maintenance payments.
Mr Bathie, a fireman from Enfield, north London, said the financial burden was preventing him from starting his own family.
"These women wanted to be parents and take on all the responsibilities that brings. I would never have agreed to this unless they had been living as a committed family. And now I can't afford to have children with my own wife - it's crippling me financially," he said.
He is now bringing a legal challenge to remove his responsibilities as a parent to the two children in a case believed to be the first of its kind.
Mr Bathie, who pays £450 a month in maintenance, cannot afford to employ a solicitor or barrister to take up his case but will approach his local MP, Joan Ryan, in the hope she can highlight his plight in the Commons.
He is seeking a retrospective change in the law that would place paternal responsibility on Sharon Arnold, who was the non-biological mother in the lesbian relationship.
Mr Bathie was approached by the couple five years ago after they had unsuccessfully asked other male friends, but no formal legal arrangement was put in place.
Last November he was astonished to be contacted by the CSA, who demanded payments and ordered him to take a £400 paternity test to prove he was the father.
He has only met his offspring on a couple of occasions.
"When they (Terri and Sharon) first approached me I did look into the legal side and understood that as a couple they would be the parents, not me. I was never 'Daddy'," he told a newspaper.
"The only reason these children are here is because they wanted children as a couple which means they should take responsibility. The CSA admit that mine is an unusual case - this is double standards and I'm having money stolen by the Government."
At the time of the donation, Mr Bathie was in a relationship with a woman who had been sterilised and was not planning to have children. He has since married another woman.
The Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority said that private sperm donors are liable financially unless they donate through a licensed clinic.
"We would warn men providing genetic material that the only time they are not the father is when they donate through a licensed fertility clinic. This does not apply to unlicensed websites or home insemination," said a spokesman.
Natalie Gamble, a fertility law expert at Lester Aldridge who advised Mr Bathie recently, said the non-biological mother in the lesbian relationship currently had no legal responsibility for the children's upbringing.
"At the moment she has no responsibility at all, which seems rather unfair. She ought to have some responsibility towards the children she has helped bring into the world," she said.
The Government is seeking to reform the legislation to give equal parenting rights to same-sex couples who form civil partnerships.
Had it been in place when Mr Bathie donated sperm it would have meant his right as a father would have passed to the non-biological mother.
Mrs Gamble said the law was becoming obsolete as a result of changes to the family structure.
"Lots of women and same-sex couples are having children through home insemination, because its cheaper, or they want somebody to have involvement in the child's upbringing or because they want to know who the father is.
"But the law is struggling to keep up with these modern scenarios. Until things go wrong it's difficult to say how the law applies."
She urged would-be parents and donors to ensure they have an agreement in place so all parties are aware of their rights and responsibilities.
Sharon and Terri Arnold could not be contacted for comment.
Could it be they are admitting marriage is between a man and woman? Could it be they’re admitting it requires a man and woman to raise a family?
Naw. This is just further persecution of evil men.
If Sharon wanted to play the man, she should get the full experience. Make her pay.
He was not annonymous.
I now pronounce you ... Man and Wife!
Who does the paying probably coorelates best with straight White male than any other term. (They have it coming to them!)
As Clint Eastwood tersely remarked in “Unforgiven,”:
“Who said anything about fair?”
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