Posted on 01/17/2008 9:04:34 AM PST by FreeManDC
Hillary Clinton has come up with a brilliant solution to the problem of millions of illegals flooding our countryside. Ready for this? Simply declare them legal — at least when it comes to women. Mrs. Clinton needed only four words to unveil her novel proposal during a Nevada campaign stop earlier this week: “No woman is illegal.”
The idea of opening the floodgates to foreign women is intriguing. Of course the pesky Fourteenth Amendment does promise “equal protection of the laws,” an ideal that presumably was intended to apply to members of the male sex.
So we could add a codicil to the Equal Protection Clause that reads, “Members of the female sex are hereby exempted from this provision.” Better yet, we could enact FWRSEA, the Foreign Women’s Rescue, Safety, and Empowerment Act, the name rendering the bill politically bulletproof. FWRSEA would create a generous revenue stream to hire hundreds of women’s studies grads who would otherwise be unemployable.
Just consider the advantages of Mrs. Clinton’s solution. Right now if an illegal woman needs a work permit, she must endure the rigamarole of finding a lawyer, tediously filling out paperwork, and then hoping for the best.
Good grief! That imposes a tremendous psychological burden on the woman and costs the American taxpayer a bundle. Why not do away with the legal formalities altogether?
All we would need to do is open up a separate entrance at the borders, “Women Only.” As women stream through the gates, a Citizenship and Immigration Service representative would distribute American passports, blue-tinted voter registration forms, and K-Mart discount coupons.
She (naturally) would also pass out brochures explaining how to qualify for welfare benefits. The brochure would go something like this:
“Bienvenidos. President Hillary Clinton and First Laddy Bill welcome you to the United States of America, richest nation on Mother Earth. Follow these four easy steps and the good life will be yours:
Get involved with a man, preferably a guy with a steady job and a nice house. Accuse him of raising his voice, throwing ashtrays, or any other form of domestic violence. It’s simple — you only need to blurt in front of the judge: “He abused me and I feel afraid.” Those magical words will entitle you to free legal services, housing assistance, priority on welfare benefits, and much more. If you get pregnant, keep it a secret from the father. Move out as soon as possible. When you fill in the birth certificate, write in the name of any well-heeled dude you’ve seen around town. That will put him on the hook for 18 years of tax-free child support payments – that’s real money! If the father learns of the pregnancy, tell everyone it was a “forced pregnancy,” creating the specter of marital rape. That will gain you immediate custody of the child and child support, plus all the welfare services. Remember, in our great country you don’t have to provide an ounce of evidence, you only need scream, ‘Abuse!’” Naturally this brochure would need to be available in Spanish, French, Sanskrit, and Tagalog. Translators would help, too.
Of course there are cranks like Camille Paglia who believe Hillary simply has it in for men. Writing in Salon she notes, “Contemptuous condescension seems to be Hillary’s default mode with any male who criticizes her or stands in her way. It’s a Nixonian reflex steeped in toxic gender bias.”
Paglia digs deeper: “Hillary’s willingness to tolerate Bill’s compulsive philandering is a function of her general contempt for men. She distrusts them and feels morally superior to them.”
And here’s the zinger: “Hillary’s disdain for masculinity fits right into the classic feminazi package.”
Unfortunately, Ms. Paglia doesn’t seem to understand this cardinal rule of American politics: You can never do too much to satisfy your female constituency. So just ignore Paglia’s inchoate rant.
So in one fell swoop you’ve solved the immigration conundrum and you’ve added millions of newly-minted voters to the Democratic rolls. Plus, you’ve sent scads of men, all would-be abusers, to chill out in the slammer, now unable to vote.
The political genius of that woman.
Here’s that warm-hearted vomit-inducing line “no human is illegal.”
Tell that to a woman whose husband was murdered by one.
I strongly support unlimited immigration for hot Brazilian and Venezuelan babes. But only if they’re hot.
Hellary is brilliant. She can solve the terrorism problem by declaring “No one is a terrorist”.
Therefore, Karla Faye Tucker should be running around free today.
She won't be running very quickly.
She could probably keep up with Christopher Reeve.
If a Democrat advocates ignoring a law, and no one in the media sees it, did a Democrat advocate ignoring a law?
So does this mean Hillary will allow Jewish women to remain in the West bank?
I sometimes worry that this is what some of our candidates mean when they say they will get rid of all the illegals.
Clinton is giving up on the Black vote and is going for the Hispanic vote.
Didn’t I read somewhere the Democrats are demanding voter I.D. in the Nevada primary? They’ll want EVERYONE to vote in the General.
Hypocrites!
I think you need to quantify your post with some pics to show what you mean. Also the statement about brazilians and venezuelan babes is racist for many hot latinas come from other countries south of the border! We musn’t be close minded! :)
The dirty little secret that you will never hear from the drive-by media is that over 50% of the legal hispanic population is also against illegal immigration. They don't want the third world to take over their neighborhoods.
"We do not have this problem. There ARE NO illegals."
“No woman is illegal.”
But all men are!
Oh goody. Then they can all move to Massachusetts and enjoy Romney's Drivers License renewal "Transgender" checkoff.
I’ve notice the news media trying to underplay the immigration issue and pushing the ‘economy’. a deflection if you ask me.
This latest survey shows Immigration is important to the GOP base!
What are the most important issues to you heading into the 2008 election cycle? (select ALL that apply)
Fighting the War on Terror (97%
Securing our borders 93%
Reducing the tax burden 67%
Iraq War — Stay the Course 67%; (Withdrawal 13%)
Protecting the Unborn 59%
Stop Abuse of Marraige 58%
Gas costs 57%
Social Security 56%
Radical environmentalism/Global warming scare 32% (Protecting the environment 11%)
http://www.firesociety.com/article/21158/src=111
I actually read an article some years back that was in the L.A. Times that included a statement by a third generation Hispanic man. He was complaining that, as a truck driver, he could not compete with the illegals and continue to keep his house and his family in L.A. It should be common knowledge that illegals are taking jobs from working class Americans of all ethnic backgrounds.
Prolly with a hatchet in her hand, which I was told was unsafe (by my 2nd grade teacher).
If the immigration issue quiets down, people will assume it was taken care of. Then a rider can be slipped in on a bill more successfully.
Her wit is immeasurable. (Measurement requires quantity)
No woman anyway.
LOL...yeah, they’re divided between those who support Hillary and those who support Obama, and Hillary’s campaign actually filed a suit to keep the Culinary union (which supports Obama and is all the casinos) from taking ballots, thus not only flip flopping on the voter ID issue but disenfranchizing voters as well. I can’t believe this seems to have flown under FR’s radar.
So women don’t have to obey the law, according to Hillary? Sheesh!
You do have to admit that HRC provides leadership in that particular area. :)
Ahh, Camile Paglia. I haven’t read her columns in quite some time. Does anyone know if she’s actively writing columns again?
Although I disagree with her on many subjects, I class her along with Christopher Hitchins as someone I greatly respect and would love to meet and have a beer with while discussing... pretty much anything. She’s brilliant, an awesome speaker (if you can keep up with her), and I wish that I had her as an art teacher: I’m sure that with a teacher like her I could have developed an appreciation for fine art.
Mark
A new fragrance...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9yRJiP4f_EU
“Clintorious”
Presumably this will be her litmus test for appointing Supreme Court Justices.
“Mrs. Clinton, if you now consider “No woman is illegal” then do you now also consider no woman is a bimbo?”
should ask >>>
.
Excellent potlatch!
Very effective graphics!
Only pictures of women illegals I could find, and they were being deported!
Bill would approve of that policy.
.
Too bad you coud not put the “Flight Attendant” at the head of the line!
Hitlery is criminally incompetent, so I guess she’s illegal.
Oh wait, she’s got male genitalia.
Never mind.
She’s directing traffic.
.
lol!
Trafficking in what?
Deportation of illegal women!
.
I know!
What do you know?
This can be ongoing..heh
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