Neeps & Tatties!!! MMMMmmm!!!
I’ll stick to the meat (pork) & steak pies! Stewart’s Bakery in Kearney, NJ makes the best!
Aye. Before slicing the Haggis, you can recite "Ode to a Haggis" by Robert Burns...as is traditional.
An' afterwards, wit a full belly, ye can recite this lal dittay:
Ode Tae A Fart
Oh whit a sleekit horrible beastie
lurks in your belly after the feastie
Jist as you sit doon amang yer kin
There starts tae stir an enormous win
The neeps ntatties n mushy peas
Start workin like a gentle breeze
But soon the puddin wi the sauncie face
Will hae ye blowin a ower the place
Nae matter whit the hell ye dae
Abodys gonny huv tae pay
Even when ye try tae stifle
Its like a bullet oot a rifle
Ye hawd yer bum ticht tae the chair
An try tae stop the leakin air
Shiftin yersel fae cheek tae cheek
An pray tae god it disnae reek
But aw yer efforts go asunder
When oot it comes, a clap o thunder
Richochets aroon the room
Michty me a sonic boom!
God Almichty it fairly reeks
Hope a huvnae shat ma breeks
Tae the bog a better scurry
Aw whit the hell, its no ma worry
Abody roon aboot me chokin
Wan or twa ur nearly boakin
All feel better fur a while
Canny help but raise a smile
Wis him! I shout wi accusin glower
Alas too late, hes just keeled ower
Ye durty bugger! they shout and stare
A dinna feel welcome any mair
But where ye go ,let yer win gang free
Sounds like jist the job tae me
But whit a fuss at Bobbys party
Owe the sake O wan wee farty.
I think I’ve suddenly turned vegetarian.
The checkout lady at the supermarket yesterday appeared to have rather spectacular tatties and neeps.