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YOU MIGHT BE A TALIBAN IF...'
Velvet Hammer ^ | 3-6-08 | self

Posted on 03/06/2008 10:05:44 PM PST by Nachum

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can’t afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon “unclean.”

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can’t think of anyone you HAVEN’T declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You’ve often uttered the phrase, ” I love what you’ve done with your cave.”

10. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.

11. You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.

12. You’ve ever had a crush on your neighbor’s goat.


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: be; might; taliban; you
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To: equaviator

i thought it was a lot bigger, its only as big as a bar of soap?

whats it called?


21 posted on 03/07/2008 3:07:45 AM PST by beebuster2000 (choice is not not peace or war, but small war now, or big war later masquerading as peace now.)
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To: beebuster2000

Muslims believe (without proof) that the revered “black stone” (Alhajar Al-Aswad) is a special divine meteorite, that pre-dates creation that fell at the foot of Adam and Eve. It is presently embedded in the southeastern corner of the Kaba. Muslims touch and kiss the black stone during Hajj but non-Muslims are strictly forbidden to even touch it.

The stone has been attacked many times and is now composed of several pieces and fragments, bound together by a silver ligature. It is semicircular and measures about ten inches horizontally and twelve inches vertically. Here a woman and her husband touch the stone.


22 posted on 03/07/2008 3:11:07 AM PST by beebuster2000 (choice is not not peace or war, but small war now, or big war later masquerading as peace now.)
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To: beebuster2000

Rock-on-a-rope?


23 posted on 03/07/2008 3:12:48 AM PST by ovrtaxt (Member of the irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men.)
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To: ovrtaxt

more intersting history of the stone:

“Before Muhammad appeared, the Kaaba was surrounded by 360 idols, and every Arab house had its god. Arabs also believed in jinn (subtle beings), and some vague divinity with many offspring. Among the major deities of the pre-Islamic era were al-Lat (”the Goddess”), worshiped in the shape of a square stone; al-Uzzah (”the Mighty”), a goddess identified with the morning star and worshiped as a thigh-bone-shaped slab of granite between al Talf and Mecca; Manat, the goddess of destiny, worshiped as a black stone on the road between Mecca and Medina; and the moon god, Hubal, whose worship was connected with the Black Stone of the Kaaba. The stones were said to have fallen from the sun, moon, stars, and planets and to represent cosmic forces. The so-called Black Stone (actually the color of burnt umber) that Muslims revere today is the same one that their forebears had worshiped well before Muhammad and that they believed had come from the moon. (No scientific investigation has ever been performed on the stone. In 930, the stone was removed and shattered by an Iraqi sect of Qarmatians, but the pieces were later returned. The pieces, sealed in pitch and held in place by silver wire, measure about 10 inches in diameter altogether and several feet high; they are venerated today in patched-together form.)” (The Joy of Sects, Peter Occhigrosso, 1996)


24 posted on 03/07/2008 3:13:52 AM PST by beebuster2000 (choice is not not peace or war, but small war now, or big war later masquerading as peace now.)
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To: beebuster2000

Interesting isn’t it? Allah is apparently just a common demon, nothing special, who made a successful power grab with Mohammed’s help.

You have to give allah credit for a nice effort. Still, his knee will bow to Jesus Christ.


25 posted on 03/07/2008 3:27:24 AM PST by ovrtaxt (Member of the irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men.)
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To: beebuster2000

...”In 930, the stone was removed and shattered by an Iraqi sect of Qarmatians,”...

I don’t think he really means “Iraqi” in that context.


26 posted on 03/07/2008 3:31:09 AM PST by equaviator ("There's a plane on the horizon coming in...see it?")
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To: ovrtaxt

dont want to bust your balloon but all religions, including judaism and christianity have precursors in practice. islam isnt any different in that respect.

there are a bunch of “relics” in christianity that are sound similarly ridiculous to the meteor in mecca.

i was on a greek island last year and people were crawling on their bellies a couple miles to kiss the glass box that supposedly had some saints bone in it.

whats the diference?


27 posted on 03/07/2008 3:32:34 AM PST by beebuster2000 (choice is not not peace or war, but small war now, or big war later masquerading as peace now.)
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To: beebuster2000
The Joy of Sects, Peter Occhigrosso, 1996

LOL I love that title.

28 posted on 03/07/2008 3:33:13 AM PST by magslinger (cranky right-winger)
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To: beebuster2000

“Before Muhammad appeared, the Kaaba was surrounded by 360 idols, and every Arab house had its god. Arabs also believed in jinn (subtle beings), and some vague divinity with many offspring.”...

Even then it was all about “change”...very interesting.


29 posted on 03/07/2008 3:39:22 AM PST by equaviator ("There's a plane on the horizon coming in...see it?")
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To: beebuster2000
There's a difference between religion and the Person of Jesus Christ.

It was religious people who insisted that He be nailed up. Remember? Religious people pursued Paul and tried on multiple occasions to murder him. Religious people killed scores of Jews and Christians during the Inquisition. Religious people killed scores of famous martyrs throughout history, in fact.

There's a vast difference between following some religion and being friends with Jesus on a personal level.

30 posted on 03/07/2008 3:40:09 AM PST by ovrtaxt (Member of the irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men.)
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To: magslinger

that is funny, hadnt noticed.

its also intersting how many religions sound when you describe the sacred worship part in clinical terms.

or is it just me?


31 posted on 03/07/2008 3:40:29 AM PST by beebuster2000 (choice is not not peace or war, but small war now, or big war later masquerading as peace now.)
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To: beebuster2000

A meteorite fell in the ar-Rub al-Hali desert & left some craters now called the “Wabar craters”. The place has always been known for having similar glass blocks & it was popular with caravan routes, so there were plenty of opportunities to pick up these rocks.

There’s a Middle Eastern legend of the city of Ubar, destroyed from the sky by G-d for its king’s disobedience of a prophet. The city was located in that area & the craters were actually re-discovered by Europeans when they were looking for Ubar. Ubar is our Atlantis of the Middle East.


32 posted on 03/07/2008 3:46:23 AM PST by forkinsocket
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To: beebuster2000
"One man's religion is another man's bellylaugh." -- Robert A. Heinlein

Although I believe he was thinking specifically about his friend L. Ron.

33 posted on 03/07/2008 3:47:12 AM PST by magslinger (cranky right-winger)
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To: ARE SOLE
If you revere an illiterate, murderous, misogynistic, pedophile, yet will murder anyone who insults same.

If you claim to belong to the Religion of Peace, yet continually want to turn other in "pieces."

34 posted on 03/07/2008 3:52:12 AM PST by Conservative Vermont Vet (One of ONLY 37 Conservatives in the People's Republic of Vermont. Socialists and Progressives All)
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To: beebuster2000

Is that thing supposed to look like a vagina?


35 posted on 03/07/2008 3:54:23 AM PST by Fresh Wind (Vaclav Klaus on global warming skeptics: "a whip of political correctness strangles their voice")
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To: beebuster2000

I commend you on your grasp of Islam, sir (or madame). Very impressive, very impressive indeed.


36 posted on 03/07/2008 3:54:59 AM PST by yankeedame ("Oh, I can take it but I'd much rather dish it out.")
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To: equaviator
Arabs also believed in jinn (subtle beings), and some vague divinity with many offspring.”

They still do. As it goes, jinn are a race that are generally invisible to humans & have magical powers. Shaytan was a jinn named Iblis who was thrown out of paradise for refusing to bow to Adam. The Arabs believe the jinn to have free will just like humans, as opposed to angels. They also are born, get married, die, & all the normal human things except that they live longer & can shapeshift.

37 posted on 03/07/2008 4:00:24 AM PST by forkinsocket
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To: ARE SOLE

14. You can’t take a joke!


38 posted on 03/07/2008 4:05:26 AM PST by Recon Dad (Marine Spec Ops Dad)
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To: ovrtaxt

“Religious people killed scores of famous martyrs throughout history, in fact.”

So, they were all famous martyrs before they were killed? Had they been killed by non-religious people, would they still have been “martyred”? I’m trying to get 4 out of what should be a matter of simply putting two and two together but there’something about that statement that doesn’t want to add up. No offense but...


39 posted on 03/07/2008 4:05:32 AM PST by equaviator ("There's a plane on the horizon coming in...see it?")
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To: equaviator

No, they’re famous now, largely because of John Foxe.

And you’re a martyr if you die for refusing to deny your faith. Doesn’t matter what the murderer’s motivation is, but it’s usually religious in nature.


40 posted on 03/07/2008 4:09:03 AM PST by ovrtaxt (Member of the irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men.)
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