Good evening Hitch.
I'm Mother Teresa and I'll be your server tonite.
May I tell you a little about our specials?
Posted on 05/26/2008 7:33:44 AM PDT by Nony
The other night, I was having dinner with some friends in a fairly decent restaurant and was at the very peak of my form as a wit and raconteur. But just as, with infinite and exquisite tantalizations, I was approaching my punch line, the most incredible thing happened. A waiter appeared from nowhere, leaned right over my shoulder and into the middle of the conversation, seized my knife and fork, and started to cut up my food for me. Not content with this bizarre behavior, and without so much as a by-your-leave, he proceeded to distribute pieces of my entree onto the plates of the other diners.
No, he didn't, actually. What he did instead was to interrupt the feast of reason and flow of soul that was our chat, lean across me, pick up the bottle of wine that was in the middle of the table, and pour it into everyone's glass. And what I want to know is this: How did such a barbaric custom get itself established, and why on earth do we put up with it?
(Excerpt) Read more at slate.com ...
oh good grief! tsk tsk
Ha, I thot he was using this as an example of Marxism — ‘Distributing your stuff to others, so that all may share equally.’ Followed by Slate’s ‘aha’ as he realized he was, truly, a conservative after all.
But no, just a whine... (um, a wine whine).
Actually, a good waiter or waitress SHOULD pour/refill your wine for you. I guess the writer was just too used to ordering his chardonnay by the glass at Applebee’s...
(not that there’s anything wrong with that!)
Answers the question. The author thinks his waiter is doing a poor job, yet he puts up with it, thus reinforcing the action in question. Then much later, he feels manly enough to act indignant.
Show a pair and put your hand over your glass or take back the bottle and politely say, "Thanks, but we'll take care of the wine."
This is much better than leaving in a miff and going off into seclusion to write an article asking why people in general put up with it.
With disastrous timing the waiter brought the humous and the taramasalata and the rest of it at this point, failing miserably to encroach on an intimate moment or kill a punch line.— Kingsley Amis, Stanley and the Women.
I want the three minutes of my life it took to read this nonsensical article back.
I agree, but a “good” waiter would have the wine in a bucket near the table, not on it.
I’m a speedreader; only took 20secs to get thru this thread. But I want that back, too.
I fall more along the lines of Peter Mayle, who celebrated has such talent with passages such as:
Now watch him at work. It seems effortless. There is no furtive wrestling with the wine bottle; the cork never sticks or breaks, but comes out with a smooth turn of the wrist, to be given a brief, considered sniff of approval. Nothing is rushed, and yet all you need --- cornichons to go with the pate, or a good fierce mustard for the daube --- is there on your table when it should be. The bread basket is refilled; the glasses are topped up. You don't have to ask for anything. Your man is telepathic: He knows what you need before you know it yourself.
(From French Lessons by Peter Mayle.)
“I want the three minutes of my life it took to read this nonsensical article back.”
That is what I was going to post...LOL. Precious moments that we will never get back!!
Tsk, tsk... Hitchens knows that fine wine should be fed to guests only through an intravenous method. It’s the only way to suitably impress them.
I thought that was so humorous and apt. I cannot tolerate intrusive waiters. I much prefer to pour my own wine and carry on a conversation with the people dining with me.
I love it when Hitchens is in high dudgeon.
Hitch ?
Must have been on his semi-best behaviour, he
usually orders his booze by the drum-load.
I’m lysdexic...so I’ll untie.
Good evening Hitch.
I'm Mother Teresa and I'll be your server tonite.
May I tell you a little about our specials?
That’s outrageous ....
... ly funny.
BTW: I still think it is pathetic how our country, the greatest one on earth, is fifth in world wine production, but only 33rd in consumption.
BTW: I still think it is pathetic how our country, the greatest one on earth, is fifth in world wine production, but only 33rd in consumption. Even the Argentineans and Chileans are in the top 10!
As an experienced waiter, I have found that you run a much greater risk by not refilling wine glasses, of appearing non-attentive. Guests should never have to pour their own wine. I know if I’m gonna pay the 200%+ mark up, I am also paying for the services that come with the purchase.
And yes, I want my 20 minutes back too.
Why do I picture this guy looking like Vincent Price?:
BTW: I know what Hitch looks like, but somehow I see him morphing into Vincent Price in one of his many drunken stupors.
I always insist (or at least try to, anyway) on pouring my own wine.
I’ve too often seen a waiter/waitress, over pour in order to empty the bottle faster so you “feel obligated” to order another one.
At a recent dinner with four dining, the waiter brought the ordered bottle and used it all on the first three glasses. Had any of us been pouring we would have evenly distributed it among the four glasses.
I’ve read that this is an old trick that is taught to waiters/waitresses to up wine sales.
If you don’t want to pour it yourself, I’d suggest requesting the wine be evenly divided before the pouring begins.
I’ll have to go tith Hitch on this one. The act of pouring wine for one’s friends adds to the festivities and the aroma of the brew.
I used to make wine and the first pour is always a thrill.
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