Nerd's wife. I win!I’ve always had crushes on nerds.
Insightful bump
Yes, it’s quite perceptive.
I think the biggest mistake nerds make is not going out for sports. It is one of the few kid-approved activities which are purposeful and recognize ability and hard work. The nerdy kids may never become the most-popular jocks, but they can get healthy exercise and a measure of respect from going out.
185 lbs. Rugby player, cliff climber, spelunker and I like to design and build my own telescopes.
I am a nerd.
Nerd's wife. I win!I am not a nerd - I’m a mental hunk...
One answer besides homeschooling, if for some reason you can't manage that, is to send a child to a smaller private or parochial school.
After investigating our local public schools, I sent my kids to religious schools. The great thing about the smaller schools is that the adults really set out to affect the culture and do succeed. There's still some of the cliqueishness and a minor degree of bullying that goes on, but it's softened by a serious effort to make nerdishness 'cool' and to make sure that every kid has a group that he's comfortable in. And with more adults and fewer kids, it works.
I've got one kid who's definitely a nerd (academics, music, and theater) and one kid who is not academic enough to be a nerd but would probably be picked on in public school. He's found his niche in sports, but is not good enough to be one of the star jocks. But that's o.k., because in the small school he has a circle of friends and a teacher-coach who keeps an eye on him.
ping... you nerd
Excellent essay! Very, very accurate description of what it's like in way too many schools. The essay is worth reading twice or thrice, and it should be required reading for school teachers and school boards. And I thought what I went through a few decades ago was hell. I'm glad I didn't have any kids that would have had to endure this more recent and much worse school hell.
Jealousy! Everyone knows that nerds are great in bed while “whitecaps” (ie Jocks) prefer showering with eachother in front of their “top”, er, “coach.”
IN my senior class the smartest kid in the class was also the class president and the city teenager of the year.
Ping for later...
The vital thing is for nerds to have nerds for parents. Nerd parents can do things like play role games with them, make bottle rockets using mentos and lots of other off the wall stuff.
We raised three and were able to give them full nerd reign even if it meant marathon sessions of slashdot.org., or tomshardware.com.
We are the proud nerds of proudly nerdy engineers who make lots and lots of money who are married to lovely nerdy lady engineers.
We are expecting third generation nerds someday.
But, but...even if one of them has an A list kid at some point, we will still love it.
I sat at what was referred to as the “’head” table. Funny thing is, most of us weren’t potheads (although a few were).
Doing stupid stuff like that is what flags a person as a geek.
I agree.
I was a persecuted nerd in secondary school (amazing how different elementary school was!), though I wasn't that smart (neither am I that successful now). I also wasn't part of any "nerd group"--especially any that used drugs. My experience was that drugs were for the cruel popular kids (who were also often the smartest students).
American compulsory education is a sad, flawed, broken institution that cripples a lot of lives. How it can be fixed, or even if it can be, is beyond me.
Thanks for posting the article.
I was a member of a group of four guys. All four of us were very good athletes. I was probably the best of the bunch, played all sports and went to college on an athletic scholarship. Two of us were very popular, one was not popular but was a great guy. He wasn't real smart but we all liked him and still do. I was not at all popular.
I scored a perfect score on all sections of the Florida Senior Placement Test except for verbal ability which I think was at the 83rd percentile. Despite this, my grades were only average.
I think I had poorly developed social skills. I could and did hang out with the most popular guys but was painfully shy around the most popular girls. Despite this, I eventually married one of the real beauties. She had a near perfect record in College, often being named outstanding student in her department. She was also a high school queen. Years later I eventually got over my shyness.
I think I would have been a nerd, despite hanging out with the "A" types.
This part really struck me: A woman I know says that in high school she liked nerds, but was afraid to be seen talking to them because the other girls would make fun of her.
I had a huge crush on a nerd my junior and senior year of high school. We went to school all 12 years together. I never told anyone. I wasn't part of the popular rowdy crowd, but the popular preppy, yuppie, semi-arty crowd (I think they let me hang out with them because I was funny).
Anyway, Brian (my crush) wasn't particularly attractive in the classic sense, but he seemed so mature and even though he was probably just as insecure as the rest of us, he had a quiet confidence about him that I thought was so cool. While the other boys were making fart jokes, he and his friends talked about physics and things way over my head, but was I fascinated! I flirted with him so subtly that I don't even think he knew. I prayed he would ask me to prom, but he didn't. He was so smart that I'm sure he's doing something benefiting mankind while I am sitting on my couch watching hockey.