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To: Aliska

You’re right there, the tests aren’t always right, it doesn’t really matter even if they’re wrong because that’s still a human child, and it doesn’t matter if the baby feels pain or not because again that is still a human child and killing that baby is wrong regardless of how much pain can be felt.

I would’ve made the same choice. I would not want my child to go down a destructive road, and I would not want to seem like I was condoning it. It would be too hard to watch, too. She’s in my prayers.


22 posted on 07/03/2008 9:04:50 AM PDT by lymelady (I have too much respect for women to ever be a feminazi.)
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To: lymelady
I agree with you about their being human. People used to accept their misfortunates and just learn to cope with it before we came up with all these tests and have to have a perfect baby. There ain't no such thing.

When I think over my positions and stances, I consider what if it were me, and I had a very disabled child? So it's not that I don't emphasize with what some people go through. But I had healthy children, the usual childhood stuff, a few bad times, it's life, and if I had a child that was so bad off I couldn't cope with it, I might institutionalize it, but now we know what happens to some of those poor, defenseless children. There is a lot of help out there for people with disabled children. Sometimes they even seem to get more preferential treatment in some ways than normal children, if they manage to be born. Only if they live. The social agencies, schools and services move heaven and earth for these children. Some they mainstream when they shouldn't imo. Many turn out to be great blessings to their families.

Thank you for your prayers for my daughter and in support of my decision. I think I would do it all over again except if it were just the divorce issue, most people think I am too picky about that, and indeed, maybe I am. I tried to raise them right with good values and morals, but I guess my mind was on my generation, and I was simply unprepared to cope with some of the things that I was confronted with in their generation. I was a single, divorced mom, never had a live-in boyfriend, never married again. But there comes a time when you cannot control the choices your children make.

My daughter has some some new devices inserted into her fallopian tubes (I wonder how safe they are over the long haul). She should NOT have any more children. My advice was to quit screwing around. But she decided to do it. I told her there was enough catholic left in me that I couldn't help her in her decision, even though I know she should not have any more children. With this last one, she at first wanted an abortion, couldn't be an enabler for that either, knowing full well then the problems that lay ahead. Trying to do the right thing is very hard sometimes, and I am by no means any saint. Funny, it was their father with the drinking problem, I drank socially but wanted to set an example, so don't drink at all for years and years now. A lot of good it did. All three of my kids have had serious drinking problems, each one different. I had to get to the point where I quit blaming myself. That one daughter, my son and I went down and got her committed once. Then I didn't want her to feel I betrayed so I told her and asked her if she was going to wait for the police to come pick her up or would she get in the car and I take her there. She got in the car.

A lot of good it did. She went for a hearing a week or so later, her friends all showed up, I was there all by myself, was so nervous didn't present my case very well, and the liberal judge let her go, problem (a serious health issue that need immediate attention as well, bad pap smear) unresolved. How those girls cheered and laughed at me. Then she took off for CA again. But eventually the chickens come home to roost. Then I have to watch that.

That's enough. I talk too much.

23 posted on 07/03/2008 10:17:53 AM PDT by Aliska
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