Posted on 07/03/2008 2:27:32 PM PDT by forkinsocket
The article leaves out the horrific effects, financial, emotional and legal, that fall solely on the man when a divorce (which is usually initiated by the woman, takes place.
i will be interested to see if there are any posts like that on this thread.
Men, he argues, need marriage for psychological stability. Marriage/monogamy increases your chances of surviving and reproducing, which is what our genes demand of us. And he commonly lives a happier and longer life. Without women men revert to packs, and spend summer nights chawing tobacco, swilling moonshine, and baying at the moon. Above all men need to feel useful. And that can only mean one thing.
That's nothing. I'm single AND an only-child. I'm about as low on the primordial ladder as you can get! O
There is no TV playing because there is no TV. The house is quiet except for the AC in the window, and the occasional bump from one of the catz. I LIKE THAT. It lets me freep while I work from home, and actually concentrate.
I have a work project spread out over part of the back yard, and the grass needs mowed, and I'm working on putting up a 40meter antenna.... and NO-ONE complains.
Thanks... I'll stay single.
/johnny
There are other issues that make marriage avoidable for me but, by and large, I'm an insular person who finds extensive relationships tiresome. I think what I like the most is the ability to focus on my interests without distraction.
That's the nice way of saying I'm selfish, I suppose.
Still, my best friend has a wife, 3 daughters and a son......and once in while, I envy him more than anyone I know.
But once in a while, he envies me.
jeeesh...
Makes me feel like a complete failure!
My short screed on marriage.
I've been married for 32 years.
Sometimes it feels like 5 minutes...
...under water.
Good to see a level-headed objective analysis and comment.
A good marriage and family life enriches your life. A bad marriage makes your life hell. To marry someone just to get married is not good. Odds are you will end up with a bad marriage, and would have been happier staying single.
It all comes back to the person you marry and how compatible you are. A lot depends on common life goals, common interests, common understandings of what you want out of family life together. The web site that advertises 29 areas of compatibility is on to something.
Bump!
That's not a bad thing.
I was married for over 20 years, raised the kids (good kids, veterans that married veterans), did the whole thing.
I value the quiet and my ability to control my own life.
I dated a beautiful, intelligent younger woman for a while, a year or so ago. I'm not up for the drama and lifestyle required to support a relationship, so I let it go.
Better all around I think.
Keep the faith, bro. You got some advantages. Just make sure you use them, and don't worry about being lonely, it's just a feeling. Getting interrupted in the middle of a project... that's a fact.
/johnny
LOLOLOLOLOLOL! Very descriptive.
/johnny
The article is interesting, though full of passive-aggressive claptrap (being single is a death knell/being single is the province of geniuses!). It is whatever it is. Yes, it’s lonely. Can’t tell you, though, how many married people have confided in me how little affection and love they receive from their mates. I find that depressing, frankly, since single people imagine that marriage cures loneliness.
When I was younger, I was scared of marriage - all the divorce going on - wanted to be sure - now that I’m a bit older, it seems even odds that many American women just want to steal my money, steal my kids, hang the boys on the wall, make me sit down to piss, etc.
What I found interesting in social and work circles - it’s one thing to be a playboy -it’s expected, etc. A threat, callous, but manageable apparently. But somehow, if someone actually takes marriage vows seriously (yours *and* theirs*) - generally conducts themselves as a gentleman, etc, that is entirely UNACCEPTABLE, for some reason. Go figure.
That's not a bad thing.
Agreed, and I wish more people were open-minded about that. I sometimes feel all-too-often like singlehood is treated like some sort of a "disease" that needs to be "cured." When I personally don't think it's all that bad, and can be a perfectly natural lifestyle for one to choose. IMHO, our society is ***far*** too obsessed with relationships and marriage.
When someone brings it up to me, I'm fairly vocal that somewhere, out there, there is a woman that's glad I'm still single. And I am, too.
/johnny
Dogs cure loneliness. So does a relationship with God.
Catz provide companionship, and remind us why we aren't married.
/johnny
Well, with me, see, especially being an only-child...I just can’t...share...thing.
I know that sounds childish and petty, but it makes me extraordinary apprehensive about ideas like relationships and marriage. I have my own bathroom. My own stuff. I can spend my money on whatever I want. I can go anywhere I want and stay there as long as I want and not be accountable. I can eat whatever or wherever or whenever I want. It’s FREEDOM. For me, being single equals being free.
And that freedom and personal space are the most valuable things in the world to me, and I cringe at the thought of having to give it up FOREVER, devoting my life to a spouse and kids, and for what? “Affection,” “Intimacy,” and “Companionship”...things I grew up without, and don’t feel any need for at all.
Am I going to do that again? No.
If you want to share, join the Marine Corps. You'll share a toothbrush, if things get hairy.
The only closer intimacy any person can have than with a spouse, is in the military. Even the AF has that.
Sharing isn't a problem, in fact, giving too much is a problem.
I just like the quiet. Very quiet.
/johnny
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