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Friends of Edwards form consortium to purchase National Enquirer, return it to it's "Roots"
Liberal Lunacy ^ | 8/20/08 | Liberal Lunacy Staff

Posted on 08/20/2008 7:01:44 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32

It's been learned that a consortium of John Edwards supporters, not Edwards himself, have formed a consortium to purchase the National Enquirer with a promise to return the paper to its tabloid roots.

Said a spokesperson, "The National Enquirer has begun delving into what they consider serious news. We feel the Enquirer belongs at the top of the supermarket checkout rack with other such notable tabloids as the Sun and the Globe. This is not an attempt to silence the Enquirer in any way and any inference to that end is misguided."

"Stories which they are now printing involving well known nation-wide personalities, with an eye towards increased sales belong only with reputable media outlets such as ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC, CNN and so on. As you know, these outlets don't consider these stories about Edwards worth printing, covering or commenting on. We trust their judgement much more than we do the Enquirer, you should too."

"We also want to ensure the paper doesn't in any way infringe on the presumptive Democratic Party nominee by delving into his past and printing information which may be detrimental to his campaign. Again, the mainstream media doesn't consider this important, and neither do we."

"In the future the Enquirer will be printing obviously false stories involving space aliens, the success of the surge and the like, thus returning the paper to it's roots."

Developing..


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: edwards; humor; nationalenquirer; obama; satire; scandals; tabloid

1 posted on 08/20/2008 7:01:45 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

bttt


2 posted on 08/20/2008 7:02:35 AM PDT by ConservativeMan55 (Obama is the Democrats guy. They bought the ticket, now they must take the ride.)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

3 posted on 08/20/2008 7:03:11 AM PDT by Red Badger (All that carbon in all that oil and coal was once in the atmosphere. We're just putting it back.....)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

Takes your breath away.

Dem gets caught. Repress freedom of the press to avoid further embarrasment.


4 posted on 08/20/2008 7:03:14 AM PDT by whitedog57
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

Got me.


5 posted on 08/20/2008 7:04:00 AM PDT by listenhillary (Obama - The Wizard of Uhs)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

This is beyond transparent. Obviously, their Liberal/Socialist allies in the MSM won’t print the truth, anyone that does will be attacked by these Socialist Liberals.


6 posted on 08/20/2008 7:04:44 AM PDT by ExTexasRedhead
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

Very Oniony of them.


7 posted on 08/20/2008 7:04:56 AM PDT by Ron in Acreage (Drill here. Drill now. Drill Paris.)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

This stuff is not supposed to happen. The glory days of democRATs getting away with anything are long gone. I guess it’s time for the democRATs to “even the playing field”.


8 posted on 08/20/2008 7:05:11 AM PDT by lormand (The Savage Nation - a parody by liberals of conservatives)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32
"Friends of Edwards"

______________________________________________

From John Edwards' official website:
"Danny Glover Campaigns for John Edwards"
Video at site!
http://www.johnedwards.com/media/video/glover/
______________________________________________


9 posted on 08/20/2008 7:06:15 AM PDT by ETL (Lots of REAL smoking-gun evidence on the ObamaRats at my Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32
Freekin’ hilarious!
10 posted on 08/20/2008 7:08:26 AM PDT by ryan71
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

Good satire is difficult to distinguish from the real truth. I’d say this fits to a T. Took me a few sentences to figure it out.


11 posted on 08/20/2008 7:09:35 AM PDT by According2RecentPollsAirIsGood
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To: GeorgiaDawg32
There is always truth in satire. Quotes I have read on Bill O’Rielly and his self censorship vis a vis Edwards read like the Onion as well.
12 posted on 08/20/2008 7:11:21 AM PDT by JimSEA (just another liberal-bashing fearmonger)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32
...with a promise to return the paper to its tabloid roots.

Roots?

Sounds suspiciously like Stalinist repression of free speech and inquiry Roots of Edwards (and "supporters" if you choose to believe that.)

13 posted on 08/20/2008 7:15:21 AM PDT by Seaplaner (Never give in. Never give in. Never...except to convictions of honour and good sense. W. Churchill)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

The National Enquirer - the offical paper of people in SUPERMARKET CHECKOUT LANES! They should buy the Weekly World News — then it would OFFICALLY be the ‘OFFICAL NEWSPAPER OF THE MOONBATS - LIKE EDWARDS SUPPORTERS’.


14 posted on 08/20/2008 7:29:17 AM PDT by RightWingTeen (Caution: homeschooled teen with a Brain that works - LIBERALS you can't control me!!)
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To: ETL

Is that like “friends of Carlotta”?


15 posted on 08/20/2008 7:32:35 AM PDT by sheik yerbouty ( Make America and the world a jihad free zone!)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

LOL, Darn...I’m going to miss his baby’s pics!


16 posted on 08/20/2008 7:33:09 AM PDT by Melinda
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

IF such a group does succeed in purchasing a publication that exposed their “friend” for what he really is, then go ahead and put up your money and convince the current owners that this is a good thing.
The reporters will only go over to The Star, U S Weekly, or whatever other scandal rag that is out there and take their sources and their stories with them.
You cannot hold hostage the current employees of the Enquirer and if I worked there, I would resent having the paper sold because we had a really juicy story that was true about a very public figure.
That would only incite me to go after all the “important” politicians I could find dirt on.
Who knows what kind of a hornet’s nest this could stir up?
Maybe one of the papers that inherits reporters from the Enquirer could set up subscriptions with a supply of popcorn with it........
More popcorn, please??


17 posted on 08/20/2008 7:38:08 AM PDT by ridesthemiles
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To: According2RecentPollsAirIsGood; writer33
Good satire is difficult to distinguish from the real truth. I’d say this fits to a T. Took me a few sentences to figure it out.

Me too. LOL!

Ping

18 posted on 08/20/2008 7:40:45 AM PDT by PGalt
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To: GeorgiaDawg32
When I was in college, the left would on occasion pick up all of the copies of the school newspaper if they didn't like what it contained.

This is the same infantile tactic on a grand scale.

19 posted on 08/20/2008 7:41:04 AM PDT by Bosco (Remember how you felt on September 11?)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32
"...reputable media outlets such as ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC, CNN and so on..."

What a HUGE JOKE!

20 posted on 08/20/2008 7:49:47 AM PDT by blondee123 (NO-BAMA for President in 2008!!!)
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To: GeorgiaDawg32

Except for page 3 (TRUE stories of Liberal Lunacy), the stories contained on these pages are entirely satirical in nature and exist only in the demented mind of the author.


21 posted on 08/20/2008 8:00:37 AM PDT by Bizzy Bugz
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To: Bizzy Bugz

Read the source


22 posted on 08/20/2008 8:02:20 AM PDT by Bizzy Bugz
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To: Bizzy Bugz

John Edwards has some awesome friends.


23 posted on 08/20/2008 8:14:59 AM PDT by Joyell
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