Sincerely, Al
Posted on 11/05/2008 4:46:07 PM PST by Bokababe
BARACK Obama swept to victory last night as millions of Americans lapped up all that bull about change.
The Illinois senator made history as the first black American to become President and the 44th man to win the office with a lot of vague platitudes and an army of creepy spin doctors.
He told a crowd of 250,000 supporters in his home city of Chicago: "Remember, change is something that happens in the middle of the night when we're all fast asleep and very often the next morning no-one can tell that anything has actually changed.
"I promised you change you can believe in, I did not promise you change you can actually see."
He added: "You believe in Jesus don't you? Right, but have you ever seen Jesus? Exactly. Just making sure we're all on the same page."
Mr Obama said he would bring about change by working closely with the vast and terrifying multi-national corporations that had funded his campaign and pledged to end the war in Iraq in order to create a much bigger war in Afghanistan.
"But instead of some middle-aged white guy doing it, it'll be me and I'm half-Kenyan. D'you see?"
Bill McKay, a college student from Denver, said: "I can't believe I now live in a country where an African American can be elected to the presidency after spending just $600 million on advertising."
He added: "Give me a hug!"
Meanwhile, in the UK, thousands of people talked about staying up all night to watch the drama unfold, but then didn't.
Martin Bishop, from Oxford, said: "I was going to follow the coverage and have the significance of every result explained to me by Lord Dimbleby but then, at the last minute, I decided to go to bed because I don't care."
Denys Hatton, from Guildford, added: "If your life is such that you're placing all your hopes in a politician, then may I humbly suggest you get yourself a crate of superlager and a cardboard box and stop wasting everyone's time."
Warning the language is pretty rough, but go to the website and below the article, see a map of the USA and how they see it.
BO is fulol of BS, Besides, he is guilty of conspiracy to murder. Each time an abortion is performed in the State of Illinois, he is an accomplice to it because of the legislation he passed there. Barack Obama is a murderer
bump for later
LOL! Thanks for that. I needed a chuckle! Bookmarked.
yeah, the McCain/^*&*%$nut ticket in the map is hilarious /s
ping for a giggle
56 million didn’t vote for the bullcrap change
Sincerely, Al
Actually, that is the one thing I missed. You are right, it's out of line.
New Orleans is pretty bad, too. Can you say co-ruption?
I have two words. School. Buses.
LOL! Yea, that was laugh worthy. I felt like e-mailing them though and ask them why they didn’t include Alaska and Hawaii on that map. I’d be curious to see what the would come up with for AK and HI labels.
How dare you! Obama is a legitimate businessman! Er, politician.
No surprise at all. Millions of Americans buy all that advertising crap on TV everyday. Complete nonsense sells!
“”Remember, change is something that happens in the middle of the night when we’re all fast asleep and very often the next morning no-one can tell that anything has actually changed.”
Like being yanked out of your bed and hauled off to a gulag with your relatives too terrified to ever speak of what happened to you?
That whole website is hilarious. Got it bookmarked!
I’m practically choking I’m laughing so hard. It’s unfortunate, however, they we will be laughing less when the PC police really start to crack down.
If you lose your sense of humor, you might as well already be in "a gulag"!
Actually 43d. Listing Grover Cleveland twice doesn't make him two persons
In such a case, I would take two or three down with me, and die a happy woman.
I have know a lot of Chicago businessmen and politicians. Check my hammer out.
Regards,
Big John D
“That whole website is hilarious. Got it bookmarked!”
I know!
BANKS TO LEND YOU YOUR OWN MONEY
THE government is to invest £500bn of your money in British banks so they can lend it back to you with interest.
The historic move is being hailed as a lifeline for the financial system as long as nobody asks too many questions.
Julian Cook, chief economist at Corbett and Barker, said: “The government will give your money to the banks so the banks can start lending you that money, probably at around 7% APR.
“Thanks to all the interest you’re paying on your own money, the banks will make billions of pounds again and normality will be restored.
“After a few years of this the government will cash in the bank shares it bought with your money and use the profits to build a huge ####ing dome somewhere.”
He added: “In case you hadn’t already worked it out - the entire global financial system is predicated on the assumption that you’re an idiot.”
Chancellor Alistair Darling said the decision had been taken in tandem with the banking industry, adding: “They used a lot of dirty words I’d never heard before and one of them had an angry looking dog.”
Meanwhile, Emma Bradford, a sales manager from Bath, said: “Why doesn’t the government just give my money to me so I can buy stuff from businesses who will then make a profit and put it in a bank?”
But Mr Darling insisted: “Shut up.”
Sincerely,
Rahm
Is this like The Onion? Pretty funny.
Great Britian can see it but our own electorate cannot. Everyone who voted for Obama was wrong, flat out wrong.
I was laughing so hard & loud when I read this that my dogs started barking and my husband came running in wondered what was the matter!
LOL!
Right on.
Back when I was in my “Stevie Nicks” clothing phase, the bikers were always freaked by just how many daggers I could stow away in the flowing folds of a gauzy skirt.
After a while, they started calling me “Shari Scissorhands” simply because of the number of knives I might have on my person at any given time.
Ha.
They shoulda seen the sword collection at home.
[this creepy state won’t let me carry a gun and damn if I’m gonna be walking around “naked”]....:)
Reminds me of the comedian who said that he came home and found that someone had broken into his apartment, stolen everything he had - and replaced them with identical items.
Possibly the most profound thing my dad ever said to me was “I’m afraid if I don’t keep laughing, I might start screaming.”
I’ll get my sarcastic groove back, eventually.
Right now, I’m shell shocked by the same-day death of my dog and my country so it *might* take a tad longer than usual.
Oh that's awful! I am sorry for giving you hard time. It so hard to lose a pet. My condolences.
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